Before I regale you with tales of my fabulous exploits (which, I assure you, are quite fabulous, indeed), I hereby announce HuSi Poops Fun Challenge, First Daily! The rules are simple; you try to make some poops, you succeed, or you fail, then you submit your poopsmaking effort, which I then trump with the sheer awesomenity of my own poopsmaking abilities, and the ease with which I produce such vile excrement. Then I am declared the winner of Poops Fun Challenge, and the cycle begins anew. Got it? Good. Go make poops. IN THE TOILET, PEOPLE, IN THE FUCKING TOILET. Anyone who makes poops on the floor or in their pants is disqualified for being an asshole, and, quite possibly, a homeless asshole, at that. And we all know that homeless assholes aren't even technically human, and therefore can be killed with impunity. I know where you are, people. I can see you from the Dial-a-view hovering 25 miles above your head. I can see your tiny little subhuman heat signature, and I can see that even tinier steamy brown log coming out of your ass. I'm homing in on that right now. You have mere seconds to live.