I’ve been on this quest to find out what was wrong with my knee...right up until the shitty insurance at this job told me its $500.00 copay for an MRI. They already forced me to get a pointless x-ray. Not only did I have to pay a co-pay for that, I had to pay for an office visit for the ortho guy to tell me that an x-ray was worthless for a knee. No shit. I’ve decided to say fuck it. My medical PTSD already made this very hard and the fucking knee doesn’t hurt anymore. I’m worried about how it's damaged, but damn, son. I’m going to find some exercises on the web for the strengthening the knee and do those. If I’m being honest, I wasn’t going to let them do anything but assign exercise and/or physical therapy anyway. I’ll have surgery again only when abso-fucking-lutely necessary. So fuck you very much to United Healthcare Oxford.

I am gonna call the psych person for an appointment. I just haven’t done it yet. Doing these medical things is like moving a boulder uphill for me, the fear and avoidance is over the top.

The gangster neighbors are gone and a property search reveals that the house has been auctioned. It's also been winterized and the power, gas, and water shut off. I’m thinking we are not getting new neighbors for a while. The kitty-corner across the road lady with the abusive husband is gone too. I saw him for a while getting the last of his shit after the lady was gone. That house is now empty too, although I expect that there will be someone there sooner rather than later.

I’m working on my now well aged novel again. I have a lot of passion for it, but I’m starting to feel as if I don’t have the knack for the nuts and bolts of fiction. You know, describing things well and setting the scenes. I do world-building like a motherfucker, but the rest doesn’t come easy. It's also intimidating to live with someone who is five months out on their PHD in….creative writing. She’s very encouraging, always positive about it to me. But she’s so far beyond me in the craft I can’t even *see* her from here.

We had a party for those who helped us move in April. Had about 15 people over, it went pretty well. We smoked a brisket on my 22” Weber grill. Took about 11 hours. It came out great. They DESTROYED it and the two loaves of Turbo Bread I made to go with it, as well as my wife’s extensive cheese plate. Much scotch was drunk and all were happy, so that’s good. Still trying to clean up after that.

I’m going to Los Angeles for a supremely boring conference next week for three days. Then I’m gonna take some time off for Thanksgiving. One more trip to SF after that and I’m done traveling for the year.

Speaking of Traveller I put the campaign I’ve been running for the last six months on hiatus. I’m burned out somebody else is gonna have to step up. I hope that isn’t the end of the little group of internet randos I’ve been playing with for the better part of two years.

Anyway, that’s it for now. I’ll try harder to post more, promise. You should too.