Print Story Life never goes quite how you think it will
By mmangino (Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 10:18:54 AM EST) (all tags)
 The last time I wrote one of these it was to eulogize my wife. Oh how life has changed since then!

 I was really surprised about how hard it was after Jen died. I know that sounds kind of dumb, but I had assumed since I'd known the end was coming for so long, I had already done my grieving. It turns out that I hadn't. Over time things did get easier. After about 7 weeks, I realized that I was lonely and really wanted some additional human contact. With that, I signed up or Plenty of Fish.

Online dating is not at all what I expected. It's amazing how much easier it is to talk to people when you have self confidence and know what you want in life. It was super easy to brush off rejection. After a few days, I started chatting with a woman named Heather. She was my age with 3 kids. A Navy veteran who had a good job and shared my values. After a few days, I got up the courage to ask her out on a date. On 5/31, we met for what was expected to be lunch.

I was a nervous wreck! We met for tacos and what I was sure would be a disaster. I fully believed I would get there and feel like it was way too soon. When she walked down the street I was shocked. She was even more beautiful than her pictures would have led me to believe. We had tacos and lunch was over way too soon. Since neither of us were ready to leave, we moved to a bar. What felt like a few minutes later, I looked down at my watch to see that it was 5:30 and I was late to get my kids. I frantically called my nanny to apologize and headed home.

The next week, she came over for dinner and we talked until 2am. I even kissed her on the cheek when she left (I'm very forward!) A few days after that, I went France. Around the time I was getting back, she went to Florida with her 17 year old and 13 year old. Since we weren't very serious at this point, I went out on a few other dates while she was gone. After all, online dating was amazing! Only it turns out that it wasn't online dating, it was Heather that was amazing. A few crappy dates later and I was happy for Heather to return. I kept talking to other women, but never really found anyone else I wanted to go out with. A few more dates later and Heather mentioned that she wasn't going to see other people.

In many ways it's crazy, but around our 5th or 6th date we started talking about getting married. I can't believe how quickly we went from "I'm not sure I'm ever going to be ready to get married again" to "I can't imagine being with anybody else" Maybe we're crazy, but on 8/30 I proposed and she said yes. We'll be moving in together when her kids are done with school. 

It's going to be interesting with 5 kids between the two of us :) My kids are super excited. They love Heather and have a blast with her kids. They are great with her 4 year old and really look up to her older kids. Her kids are all great with mine. I have no idea how I've gotten this lucky, but I'm thrilled. Like I said, life certainly isn't what I expected, but it's wonderful. 

Here's a picture of all of us (minus her 13 year old who was with a friend)

< HELLO FROM CALI-FOR-NIA!!!! | I don't think this is supposed to be how it works >
Life never goes quite how you think it will | 22 comments (22 topical, 0 hidden)
Damn Dude! by clock (3.75 / 4) #1 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 10:58:04 AM EST
Congrats! This is great news!

Life seems to move fast sometimes, but really? It's moving at the right pace.

Again, this is great!

I agree with clock entirely --Kellnerin

Congratulations by lb008d (4.00 / 1) #2 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 02:03:59 PM EST
It's great to read about more love existing in the world.

Hell yes by Gedvondur (4.00 / 2) #3 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 02:39:47 PM EST
That's amazing. You made my morning with this story. I'm so happy for you!

Congratulations by anonimouse (2.00 / 0) #4 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 03:03:12 PM EST
 It is definitely a good feeling to walk out of the tunnel into some light.

Girls come and go but a mortgage is for 25 years -- JtL
that's great by sasquatchan (2.00 / 0) #5 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 03:27:17 PM EST
I didn't want to barge in on the "fiancee" comment you made earlier.. thanks for the update.

Fantastic by Phil the Canuck (4.00 / 1) #6 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 04:57:38 PM EST
Life moves fast and you just have to do your best to keep up.

You're one shy of a Brady Bunch reboot by lm (4.00 / 2) #7 Mon Oct 21, 2019 at 11:20:07 PM EST
I'm glad to see some good news.

There is no more degenerate kind of state than that in which the richest are supposed to be the best.
Cicero, The Republic
We've talked about it by mmangino (2.00 / 0) #8 Tue Oct 22, 2019 at 08:20:16 AM EST
 I'm just not sure if I'm that much of a glutton for punishment!

[ Parent ]
I can't believe that it's only been a week ... by lm (2.00 / 0) #19 Wed Oct 30, 2019 at 04:41:39 AM EST
... since I wrote that comment, being genuinely excited for your and being 100% certain that I wasn't looking for a serious relationship so soon.

I had no idea what I was in for.

There is no more degenerate kind of state than that in which the richest are supposed to be the best.
Cicero, The Republic
[ Parent ]
I get it! by mmangino (2.00 / 0) #20 Wed Oct 30, 2019 at 07:07:34 AM EST
Heather and I went from talking about how neither of us was looking for anything serious to talking about marriage in just a few weeks. You just never know what's going to happen :) 

[ Parent ]
Congrats! by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #9 Tue Oct 22, 2019 at 08:42:30 AM EST
That's a good looking family to be.

congrats! by StackyMcRacky (2.00 / 0) #10 Tue Oct 22, 2019 at 09:05:45 AM EST
I am so happy for you!

I love it by kwsNI (2.00 / 0) #11 Tue Oct 22, 2019 at 05:33:30 PM EST
Thanks for the update and let us updated.

adorbs by MillMan (2.00 / 0) #12 Wed Oct 23, 2019 at 01:25:36 PM EST

"Just as there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no libertarians in financial crises." -Krugman

Lovely news! by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #13 Wed Oct 23, 2019 at 06:12:12 PM EST
Thanks for sharing. And congratulations!

Fantastic!!!!!!! by me0w (4.00 / 1) #14 Thu Oct 24, 2019 at 12:03:37 PM EST
I am so happy for all of you!!

Last year, on the advice of my psychiatrist, I dipped my toe into the online dating world and mostly got responses from married men looking for something on the side ... and an abundance of dick pics. After that jaunt into the dating world, I'm okay with being single. I am very happy that it worked out for you!

Uggh by mmangino (4.00 / 1) #15 Thu Oct 24, 2019 at 02:51:14 PM EST
Men are gross. The only Dick pics I've sent are of Cheney and Nixon. I don't envy being a woman on those sites! 

[ Parent ]
The best thing to send by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #16 Thu Oct 24, 2019 at 04:38:22 PM EST
is this:

[ Parent ]
Just use this pic to send back by Orion Blastar (4.00 / 1) #22 Thu Nov 07, 2019 at 01:58:17 AM EST
<a href=""></a>

It should scare them from sending more dick pics.

"I drank what?" - Socrates after drinking the Conium
[ Parent ]
Woohoo! by yankeehack (2.00 / 0) #17 Sun Oct 27, 2019 at 04:36:25 PM EST
"...she dares to indulge in the secret sport. You can't be a MILF with the F, at least in part because the M is predicated upon it."-CBB
Hooray! by iGrrrl (2.00 / 0) #18 Tue Oct 29, 2019 at 05:39:13 PM EST
Late to the party, and happy for you!

"Beautiful wine, talking of scattered everythings"
(and thanks to Scrymarch)

I am glad by Orion Blastar (2.00 / 0) #21 Thu Nov 07, 2019 at 01:18:49 AM EST
things are doing better for you.

"I drank what?" - Socrates after drinking the Conium
Life never goes quite how you think it will | 22 comments (22 topical, 0 hidden)