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By spiralx (Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 06:49:09 AM EST) (all tags)
Good morning all. Let's see if this diary takes less time than the last one to write!

Poll: how is your life now compared to five years ago?

 Saturday evening I went out to a party I'd been looking forward to for quite a while called Ravewatch, basically a small night put on by some friends who live in a communal arts space... ok, squat... in Leytonstone. I think it was about 60 people, probably two-thirds of which I knew, some good drum and bass and dubstep and I spent a fun night/morning dancing, chatting to various people, and enjoying my first acid in about six months. And I fulfilled my CBT goal of limiting the amount of ketamine I bought, so it was all good. Got back to my place with one of my housemates and a friend about midday Sunday and had pizza and watched nature documentaries before crashing.

This week at work I'm fixing some bugs in the Python plugin I wrote for the WYSIWYG XML editor used by the editorial staff here. Unfortunately, the monograph where the bug is cropping up in is "Gonorrhea Infection". Fortunately, the editor opens most of the document collapsed, so I'm spared any images...

I went to see a play last night which my ex-housemate girl Sam's (as opposed to one of my other housemates, boy Sam) new housemate was in. It was called The Typographer's Dream, and was about three people - a typographer, a geographer and a stenographer - and was pretty good. Had a few drinks in Brick Lane after with the friends I'd gone with, and left at a reasonable time to get home.

Got a busy weekend ahead; out on Friday to Therapy Sessions for some proper rinsing drum and bass, meeting my friend John for drinks Saturday evening, and then having Sunday lunch with my family the day after, will get to see my 4-month old niece which I'm looking forward to :)
< All your electricity has done is give me more power to do - electric boogaloo! | big day! >
Push pineapple shake the tree | 33 comments (33 topical, 0 hidden)
I voted 'Better' by ambrosen (4.00 / 3) #1 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:13:11 AM EST
But only because I look at the big picture and ignored the fact that someone had just inserted the hook from 'Agadoo' into my brain.

The bastard! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:34:19 AM EST
Some people eh? 

[ Parent ]
Heh, yeah. by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #7 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:09:21 PM EST
In terms of how my life is, it's not so shabby at all. Given that I was in the midst of 6 or 7 years of depression and misery 5 years ago, yeah, much better hits the spot. I'm still piss poor and behind in terms of, you know, stuff I own, job experience and all that crap, but yeah, life's great.

[ Parent ]
Never really rated Ketamine by jump the ladder (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 10:52:34 AM EST
As a drug so never had a problem saying no.

My life is different from 5 years ago.

And by anonimouse (2.00 / 0) #5 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 04:16:38 PM EST're posting much less diaries than 5 years ago.

Girls come and go but a mortgage is for 25 years -- JtL
[ Parent ]
I voted much worse by Cwis (4.00 / 0) #4 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 12:33:04 PM EST
Due to various unconnected occurances, circumstances and a couple of complete gits.

I'm far more cynical, far more defensive, far more pessimistic and slightly more paranoid.   I also find an undercurrent of anger lying under the surface of my persona that wasn't there before. Maybe I've just manned the fuck up?

I work to live, rather than the other way round, and have returned to a previous employer so I can walk in to work.
The work I do is boring and unchallenging but I do it amongst pleasant people. It should last a few more years while I complete my exit strategy from the IT industry.

And I'm single and staying that way.

Manning up by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #16 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 06:03:42 AM EST
Maybe I'm just some kind of limp-wristed metrosexual, but I don't think anger, defensiveness, pessimism and paranoia constitute "manning up". Sorry to hear you're not in such a great place though.

[ Parent ]
Pussy! by Cwis (2.00 / 0) #18 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 11:15:48 AM EST
You're right, of course. I was far too trusting and naive - maybe I've overcorrected.

I feel it's temporary, and probably a defensive posture that is understandable in context.

[ Parent ]
better by MrPlough (2.00 / 0) #8 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:23:47 PM EST
but boy has it been worse in the meantime...

No work.
ouah by Merekat (2.00 / 0) #14 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:32:09 AM EST
All the names are delurking.

[ Parent ]
I suspect.... by MrPlough (2.00 / 0) #32 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 07:57:18 PM EST
..that may have been my first comment in about 5 years...

No work.
[ Parent ]
WIPO: DiffereNT by kwsNI (4.00 / 2) #9 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:24:57 PM EST

Much worse by ana (4.00 / 1) #10 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 07:46:45 PM EST
But then 5 years ago it was uncommonly better than usual.

"And this ... is a piece of Synergy." --Kellnerin

To elaborate by ana (2.00 / 0) #24 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 03:22:39 PM EST
somewhat, see here.

"And this ... is a piece of Synergy." --Kellnerin

[ Parent ]
flat. by dev trash (2.00 / 0) #11 Wed Mar 09, 2011 at 09:24:10 PM EST
I make more money, if only slightly.
I have savings, if only a bit.
I've lost weight.

But I'm a mess emotionally.  flat.


*hug* n/t by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #30 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:10:39 PM EST

[ Parent ]
same same but different by Merekat (4.00 / 1) #12 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 03:31:57 AM EST
A longer version will merit a standalone.

Perhaps we should all do a standalone by Cwis (2.00 / 0) #15 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 05:38:54 AM EST
On the last 5 years? It seems to be a subject that makes us de-lurk!

[ Parent ]
girl Sam & boy Sam by codemonkey uk (4.00 / 1) #13 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 03:40:57 AM EST
That cracked me up, my eldest son refers to two of the kids in his class at school as "boy Reece" and "girl Reece".


--- Thad ---
Almost as Smart As you.

Great minds think alike :) n/t by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #17 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 06:12:44 AM EST

[ Parent ]
It's really great to see you back here. by muchagecko (2.00 / 0) #19 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 12:11:32 PM EST
5 years, eh?

I'm on the cusp of greatness, so things are definitely better. Although I miss the East Coast something fierce.

A purpose gives you a reason to wake up every morning.
So a purpose is like a box of powdered donut holes?
My Name is Earl

O RLY? by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #27 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:05:17 PM EST
How so? 

[ Parent ]
I start a great job next week by muchagecko (2.00 / 0) #29 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:10:24 PM EST
in an industry I love, making a fantastic wage.

A purpose gives you a reason to wake up every morning.
So a purpose is like a box of powdered donut holes?
My Name is Earl

[ Parent ]
Win! n/t by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #31 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:11:05 PM EST

[ Parent ]
How is my life now compared to five years ago? by me0w (2.00 / 0) #20 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 01:24:11 PM EST

Turns out I'm crazy.

Same here! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #25 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:03:45 PM EST
See my previous diary. Hope it's going well for you :) 

[ Parent ]
Still working out the kinks. by me0w (4.00 / 1) #33 Fri Mar 11, 2011 at 07:00:52 AM EST
Turns out there are lots of combinations of antipsychotics, mood stabilizers, and sedatives.

I'm glad the meds are working well for you :D

[ Parent ]
I am going to be brutally honest by theboz (4.00 / 2) #21 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 02:25:05 PM EST
I voted "worse", but that doesn't mean that I don't have things I am happy about.  Obviously, I am happy to have my two kids and still have my wife put up with me.  I am happy that I make more money than I did back then.  However, overall I don't really feel like I'm enjoying my life at all.

My typical day could be described as, "Wake up, brutal drive in to work, put up with a bunch of bullshit at work, brutal drive home, arrive home exhausted but expected to be ready to deal with kids, feed kids, run errands, get kids ready for bed, go to bed and get five hours of sleep."

I know things will get better, but a third kid is on the way, my job is sucking worse and worse, traffic is getting worse, everything is getting more expensive, and I am tired of living in the suburbs.

So I do appreciate that I'm not starving in the streets, rotting in a prison in Libya, or dealing with illness on behalf of myself or anyone in my family.  I realize my life is pretty good, but that doesn't mean I enjoy it.
- - - - -
That's what I always say about you, boz, you have a good memory for random facts about pussy. -- joh3n

Sorry to hear that by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #26 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:04:31 PM EST
Sucks being stuck in a rut.

[ Parent ]
Five years ago by curmudgeon (2.00 / 0) #22 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 02:51:40 PM EST
I was getting laid a bit more often, but the slide towards a sexless marriage had already clearly started, and I could see it happening.  Then as now I was very conflicted on what to do, so I've mostly done nothing.  Maybe then I felt a bit more that if I were just somehow a better person, or if other circumstances in our lives were different, the slide would stop or reverese.  Now I know far more about the medical issues behind it, which possibly makes me even more conflicted.
Get over it.
Sounds hard by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #28 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 04:06:37 PM EST
Sex is very important in a relationship... hope you can sort things out one way or another. 

[ Parent ]
Much Better! by mmangino (4.00 / 2) #23 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 03:17:52 PM EST
 In the last 5 years I:
I have no idea how the next 5 years can possibly compare.

Awesome! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #34 Fri Mar 11, 2011 at 08:23:12 AM EST
That really is a list of epic win :) 

[ Parent ]
Push pineapple shake the tree | 33 comments (33 topical, 0 hidden)