Print Story A Day in the Life
By ReallyEvilCanine (Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 04:48:56 AM EST) A Day in the Life, Nintendo, Windows 2003, unsupported, fuckwit, pie (all tags)
In My Sights

Lasers! Pew pew pew!

MAME's running and I'm busy playing Nintendo's 1980 Radar Scope in preparation for the next time I visit my brother so I can finally give him the ass-whooping he so richly deserves. He owns an original upright and practices the only game he could ever consistently beat me on. I'm in the zone on wave 5 with all my ships and still no damage when Jabber pops up.

Yo, REC!
I got a little problem maybe you can help.

Poll: Best Nintendo arcade game of 1980
x-posted to da brog.

I hit pause. This can't be good, but Joey's cool. We've gone out a few times and I like him so the game has to wait.

REC: What's up?
Joey: I got this guy with a problem with the Dev client. If it manages to open, it freezes. If it gets past the freeze it crashes. Same thing happens with the connected client. They're on Windows.
REC: OK, Windows what?
Joey: XP. They said they're on a supported platform.
REC: Did they tell you it was on XP?
Joey: No, but it's got to be that or Win2K.
REC: It don't gotta be nuttin'.

A little bell was going off in my head.

REC: Happens in both Dev and Connected client?
Joey: Yeah. I've been trying for a week but I can't reproduce it.
REC: But normal browsers work?
Joey: Sometimes.
REC: Sometimes?
Joey: That's what he said, but I wanted to just focus on the Dev and Connected clients to rule out the server stuff.
REC: Hold on a sec...
Joey: ok...

Clicky-clicky-clicky where the fuck is that goddamned ticket? I know it, I know it, I just sorted this same shit out maybe a week or so ago. And another light bulb: Joey's been working on this problem since about the time I dealt with mine.

REC: When did you get this ticket?
Joey: last Wednesday

Clicky-clicky ORDER BY DATE clicky-clicky

You motherfucker.

REC: The guy you're dealing with, his name is Abodha, right?
Joey: Yeah. You looking at my ticket now?
REC: Nope. Have a look at ticket 12-A45-33701
Joey: Hold on.

Abodha, This is a summary of our communications so far:

18FEB Abodha: I have installed Connected Client on my Remote Machine. Still doesn't work.
18FEB REC: Are you getting any errors when trying to access using a supported platform ?
20FEB Abodha: We are not facing this problem on other Remote Machines which are having Micrisoft Windows XP only 2003
20FEB REC: Windows 2003 is not certified as a client OS
27FEB Abodha: Escalate!!
27FEB REC: Escalate what? OS is unsupported.
29FEB Abodha: Problem is on server with windows server 2003.
29FEB REC: Windows 2003 not supported. Does it work on your XP workstations?
03MAR Abodha: We are talking about connected client on server not workstation
03MAR REC: Windows 2003 server is not supported for running ANY client. You cannot run a Connected client on your server.
05MAR Abodha: Your documents don't say windows 2003 is not supported
05MAR REC: Our documents don't list more than 70 million programs that aren't supported. We only list what we do support. Windows 2003 is not on that list as I explained in painful, technical detail two weeks ago.

You can't run a client on any Windows Server platform, period. This ticket is closed.

Joey: I've got tickets piled up waiting because of this guy!
REC: I don't. My short temper is an asset.
Joey: You're still an asshole sometimes
REC: You say that like it's a bad thing. I'm outta here at 4pm today. How about you?
Joey: 8pm if I'm lucky.
REC: By then I'll be downloading Dirty Jobs and drinking a large glass of port-finished Edradour.
Joey: Fuck you.
REC: If only you'd said that to Abodha.

A twenty says that fuckwit files the another ticket again today or tomorrow, tweaking it further to hide his lies. One E-Mail to management, one to all my SYSOPS homies.

Root Cause: सप्तदश ("saptadaza")

< on a personal foible | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
A Day in the Life | 16 comments (16 topical, 0 hidden)
You never fail... by belldandi (4.00 / 1) #1 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 05:06:01 AM EST
to entertain. I must say that I like reading your posts, as well as anecdotes about Zippy and others; it's like a more profane version of Dilbert. I guess I'm also glad that my Dilbert moments don't seem to ever be as bad as what I read about here.

Thanks for the smile this morning,

I think for christmas by joh3n (4.00 / 1) #2 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 05:38:29 AM EST
We should all pitch in and buy you a short with 'Escalate!!!' embroidered on it.

I just ate about 7 pounds of meat

I was thinking of doing a Cafe Press shirt: RC:17 by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #3 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 05:46:54 AM EST
But even I wouldn't shell out 20 bucks for that. My experiences with their products have been less than stellar.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
80's video games by sasquatchan (2.00 / 0) #4 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 06:00:07 AM EST
Since I had to google yours, and it doesn't ring a bell, I wonder if you know of a galaga like game I recall playing as a kid.

It was like galaga/space invaders -- you shot oncoming swarms. Only it was bugs (like galaga), yet you could "capture" lots of bugs -- have something like 8 bugs on either side of your ship, and on some bonus levels, you'd "bounce" the oncoming ones -- kept shooting them, and they'd bounce back up, and more points etc.

No luck ever remembering what it was. Played it at sports camp many, many years ago.. MAME didn't help me, nor wiki.

Probably 'Gaplus', possibly 'The End' by ReallyEvilCanine (2.00 / 0) #7 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:44:11 AM EST
'The End' was the first Konami game Stern licensed for the US (others followed) in 1980. Gaplus was a Namco game from 1984. Both had bugs but Gaplus had a tractor beam to and bonus round screens where you'd shoot a few bugs and they'd go up a bit then fall down to the left or right alternating with each shot.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
I followed wiki by sasquatchan (2.00 / 0) #8 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:49:15 AM EST
to gaplus, but the description they gave didn't sound right from what I recall.

And I tried googling it, but too many of the sites are blocked here (even google pictures) so I couldn't make a call on it..

But your comment about bonus rounds bouncing the bugs sounds spot on... I just remember "juggling" the bugs got more points -- the bonus was for how many bugs you hit, and each time you hit one and it recoiled back up, you could keep shooting it for a long time, racking up the points..

[ Parent ]
I can't recall any other bouncing bug bonus games by ReallyEvilCanine (2.00 / 0) #11 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:58:48 AM EST
Gaplus is the only game which meets your description and I feel stupid for including "The End" except that it had bugs and maybe you'd confused the gameplay of two machines.

Gaplus was a the third in the Galaxian series (after Galaxian and Galaga). It also didn't hold you on the bottom of the screen but allowed you to move... [starts up MAME, starts Gaplus, waits, tests] a full halfway up the screen which could be useful but also very dangerous.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
Guess I'll need to look into by sasquatchan (2.00 / 0) #12 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 08:07:55 AM EST
it as well. Gotta go fine my 3gb cache of MAME roms I lifted a looong time ago and see if it's in there..

(I'm afraid I lost those ROMs, though I leeched many from back when they actually linked to roms for emulators like MAME and nesticle, SNES emus etc)

[ Parent ]
I'm still seeding a good torrent. by ReallyEvilCanine (2.00 / 0) #13 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 08:48:46 AM EST
If you PM me I can set you up an account on my FTP to leech it. Not complete but the best collection I have so far. ISO -- I use Alcohol to run it. Downside: have to hit OK each time to start a game.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
You doth protest too much by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #5 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 06:47:41 AM EST
Can't you save some time by nmap -O'ing these beeyatches while they're still thinking what lie to tell you?  Or require a systeminfo dump or else the ticket gets sent to wherever Rove's email went.

I think you like talking to these klutzes.  Screwing midgets, and all that.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

We can't stop them filing. by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #9 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:52:18 AM EST
But at some point we always nail 'em. Usually it's within the initial mail or two, or if not that then the damned logs (thank you HijackThis and msinfo), but with shitheels like these relief only comes when we give in and do a Web conference, allowing us see everything for ourselves. The first thing we do is hit that fucking Start button to see which OS they're on.

Even after being busted they'll try to keep us on the phone, talking at us the way old people blabber on to the cashier. They're desperate to talk to someone... even me. For the life of me I can't imagine why. I've thoroughly dressed down Mook-Man for wasting my time but he keeps coming back like a battered wife, trying to get me on the phone for his latest system destruction. This explains a lot about a number of my problems with $BigBank since I have multiple accounts at multiple divisions of theirs.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
Whatever happened to by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:02:25 AM EST
"The customer is always right"?

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

a 40 kilo SLA happened to customer service -nt- by clover kicker (2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 07:53:32 AM EST

[ Parent ]
Nintendo...Pffft by Phage (2.00 / 0) #14 Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 11:25:34 PM EST
There was only Defender

You can't play Defender with a keyboard and mouse by ReallyEvilCanine (2.00 / 0) #15 Thu Mar 13, 2008 at 02:16:11 AM EST
Donkey Kong, Mario Bros., Punch-Out and all the VS and Playchoice games work just fine. That said I'd give up one of my pinball machines for a Defender or Stargate upright.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
*hug* by duxup (2.00 / 0) #16 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 06:18:44 AM EST
A Day in the Life | 16 comments (16 topical, 0 hidden)