Print Story I am old.
By komet (Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 01:02:25 PM EST) old (all tags)
Today, I yelled at some kids to get the hell off my lawn.

Well, not quite, but almost.

Some kid was driving around the parking lot on his quad and making a gigantic racket. In this weather, I am more or less required to have my office window open, especially as I was in a meeting and already subjecting the client to enough of my B.O. as it was. So I went over to the window and yelled at the kid. Yes, apparently my pissed-off voice from a third floor (US: 4th floor) window is louder than an unmuffled two stroke engine directly underneath you. The kid and his friend made a runner for it, and I felt awful. Oh, how I lack the punk rock.

What's next? Rocking chairs and prostate exams?

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I am old. | 13 comments (13 topical, 0 hidden)
TURN DOWN YOUR RADIO by aphrael (4.00 / 2) #1 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 01:13:30 PM EST
I can't hear myself think.
If television is a babysitter, the internet is a drunk librarian who won't shut up.
that's actually very punk rock by fleece (4.00 / 3) #2 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 01:24:16 PM EST
you're the angry man in the suit shaking your fist while the sk8-boarders olly over your bonnet in a traffic jam.

I don't know about you by komet (4.00 / 2) #3 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 01:26:59 PM EST
but I've suddenly got a craving for Mentos.

<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.
[ Parent ]
Be sure to wash them down with Diet Coke. /nt by Ignore Amos (4.00 / 1) #5 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 02:28:43 PM EST

[ Parent ]
Try playing pickup hockey with teenagers by cam (4.00 / 2) #4 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 01:40:37 PM EST
I spend three hours yelling "get of the f**king ice you little c**t!"

Little f**kers wont get off. Their f**king parents should be teaching them about ensuring your team has a fair-go not some irate stranger.

Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

I made my son get a haircut last week by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 2) #6 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 02:46:18 PM EST
He looked like a damn hippie!

Now accepting suggestions for a new sigline
damn straight by webwench (4.00 / 2) #10 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 05:19:05 PM EST
#2 guard straight across.

Getting more attention than you since 1998.

[ Parent ]
You use a guard? by atreides (2.00 / 0) #12 Fri Jun 16, 2006 at 03:59:48 AM EST
What? You want your kid to look like a hippie or something?

Have you seen The Passion yet? Here's a spoiler for you: Jesus dies.
"...compassion is more than a 16 point word in scrabble." - MostlyHarmless

[ Parent ]
How's your cholesterol? by ad hoc (4.00 / 2) #7 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 02:50:39 PM EST

Close friendships and a private room can offer most of the things love does.
did you get enough by alprazolam (4.00 / 2) #8 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 04:01:37 PM EST
fiber today?

don't feel awful by martingale (4.00 / 1) #9 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 04:25:54 PM EST
Feeling awful is the mind killer. Feeling awful is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face the awfulness. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the innter eye to see its path. Where the awful feeeling has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Kids. Fuck'em. There's plenty more where they come from.
$E(X_t|F_s) = X_s,\quad t > s$

Did you hear? The Dried Prune Marketing Board by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #11 Fri Jun 16, 2006 at 02:14:26 AM EST
Is now the Dried Plum Marketing Board.  Those sell-outs are never getting another cent from me again.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
Don't fear the prostate exam, dude. by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #13 Fri Jun 16, 2006 at 05:25:37 PM EST
You're in for a surprise.

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

I am old. | 13 comments (13 topical, 0 hidden)