Print Story Dude, like, no way!
By Dr Thrustgood (Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:00:22 AM EST) fun loving cowqaas. (all tags)
Totally sober Dr T diarising ahead!

Poll: Have you ever woken up somewhere with a bastard hangover and no idea where you are let alone who this "person" offering tea is?

So, lemme see, things that have been happening:

This week I have left the flat on several occaisions. I even went to a meeting today and like totally had to interact with people!

I have decided that my local Japanese takeaway is the best place in the world. Reasons include: Pretty  Japanese staff girlies that are cute and delightfully attentive; sushi; err, that's it.

Guitar rocking is coming along. If I try really, really hard, I can sometimes change chords with but a "one - two - three - four" delay. RAWK!

Having been far too busy/lazy to clean up my flat, it appears that a travelling circus of mice have been entertaining themselves in my kitchen. So, I've been trapping the (small, furry) bastards. Irritatingly, they don't appear to be interested in chocolate, bacon, butter, anything but my finest reserve gruyere. This is where a drunken "I'll be nice and treat them before they die" moment gets you.

I like a band called Clor.

I have yet to find a mother and sister combination willing to indulge in simultanious naughtiness. Surely there must be one profile out there on an intarwebnet dating site?

< Where *does* the time go? | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
Dude, like, no way! | 39 comments (39 topical, 0 hidden)
Mice by lm (4.00 / 1) #1 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:03:58 AM EST
I always bait mouse traps with either a combination of nachos and peanut butter or Nabisco's Cheez-Its.

Kindness is an act of rebellion.
Peanut Butter by Improbus (4.00 / 1) #2 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:42:22 AM EST
The last time I was mouse hunting I used peanut butter to bait the mouse traps and it worked great.  I had three dead mice in the space of a couple hours.  If there were more than three mice in the house none of the others wanted to sign up for a Darwin Award.

If you immediately know the candlelight is fire, the meal was cooked a long time ago. --- Oma Desala
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Tried it by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 1) #9 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:33:35 PM EST
Fuckers refuse to bite.

Typical. I would get the mice with class.

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Or allergies by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #15 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:12:35 PM EST
You should put tiny poisoned inhalers out for them.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
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I *like* the way you think by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 1) #19 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:19:50 PM EST
I have been marginally evil, with baiting traps without setting them so that their little micey brains can think "Yay! He's set out the yummy machines o' food again, this is great, woo yayshi-"

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Have you tried the plain old poison baits? by lm (2.00 / 0) #26 Thu May 11, 2006 at 03:25:08 PM EST
I've also had good luck with those. The only drawback is that the mice stink up whereever it is that they die off.

Kindness is an act of rebellion.
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ugh by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #39 Fri May 12, 2006 at 09:47:14 AM EST
i once had one die in my water cooler compressor. ick.
Send me to Austria!
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Mother and sister? by motty (4.00 / 1) #3 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:53:15 AM EST
I think there's a reason you can't find any of those - it doesn't make any sense: you either want a mother and daughter or two sisters, though obviously this is one of those values of 'you want' which means 'no you fucking well don't, not really, just how barking would they have to be and in what way and why oh why oh why actively choose to go there...'

I amd itn ecaptiaghle of drinking sthis d dar - Dr T
Feh by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 4) #10 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:34:40 PM EST
Doesn't make sense; doesn't make SCHMENSE!

What can I say, I've now accepted that psyco/fucked-up is my "type." Fun.

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*Exactly* by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 3) #17 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:18:01 PM EST
Now I'm just waiting for a new one to turn up so that I can fall hopelessly in love and then have my entire life torn to shreads over the course of a year at which point I can turn to boozing heavily again.

Still, it will be fun.

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What are shreads? by motty (2.00 / 0) #31 Thu May 11, 2006 at 04:40:51 PM EST
Are they like shreds?

I amd itn ecaptiaghle of drinking sthis d dar - Dr T
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They're smaller. by Breaker (4.00 / 2) #37 Fri May 12, 2006 at 06:35:13 AM EST

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Sister-sister action is available in Thailand by komet (4.00 / 1) #4 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:56:15 AM EST
for a modest fee.

<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.
What? by Alice Pulley (2.00 / 0) #32 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:25:59 PM EST
Those 2 twin girls from the US TV show? Sweet.


'But they're adults and perfectly capable of working it out themselves. And if not, well, fuck em.' - Nebbish '06.

[ Parent ]
Mother-daughter ain't all it's cracked up to be by BadDoggie (4.00 / 2) #5 Thu May 11, 2006 at 12:08:54 PM EST
It's pretty weird, especially in the morning. More than a year later an it still weirds me out. Just find yerself a couple Best Friend For Life!!!1!!11 That's a lot less complicated and has the added benefit that they might go for each other and leave you in peace the next day.


OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

Hee-hee, you trumped thrusty by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #8 Thu May 11, 2006 at 12:56:04 PM EST
and you're USian.

[ Parent ]
Yeah yeah by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 3) #12 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:36:09 PM EST
Is he 41st in line to the British Throne? Thought not.

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41st in line? by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #24 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:28:04 PM EST
And you don't have any lackies to vet the fillies you get together with?

What is the aristocracy coming to?

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That's the problem! by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #25 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:29:02 PM EST
Too much vet, not enough filly!

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Oh dear. by ni (2.00 / 0) #30 Thu May 11, 2006 at 04:21:49 PM EST
Now, this is just begging for alteration.

Reports indicate he is interested in carnal knowledge of a mother and daughter (or possibly mother/sister). Some have implied that this is indicative of the monarchy's intuitively incestuous nature.

my experience is that people will do amazingly stupid things in conjunction with their crotches -- persimmon

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Oh my! by Dr Thrustgood (4.00 / 1) #11 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:35:34 PM EST
Good man!

Me? Jealous? Dunno what you're on about...

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Tell me about it by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #21 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:22:47 PM EST
And when your dad finds out, it gets really awkward.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
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Who do you think was holding the camera? by Dr H0ffm4n (4.00 / 1) #40 Wed May 17, 2006 at 10:40:19 PM EST

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coincidence by jacob (2.00 / 0) #6 Thu May 11, 2006 at 12:24:28 PM EST
  1. I read this diary: "I like a band called Clor."
  2. Immediately afterwards, I go to Pitchfork, and here's the top story.
It's amazing!

(Yes, amazing! that somebody actually reads Pitchfork, yeah yeah yeah.)


What? by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #13 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:36:39 PM EST
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Someone actually reads that site! Argh!

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Trick to playing guitar chords by cam (2.00 / 0) #7 Thu May 11, 2006 at 12:42:39 PM EST
and bass for that matter is to do 1,2,3 in the chord than strum an open G while you get your fingers in the right position for the next 1,2,3. Listen to any super happy tune, it is full of fast chord changes where the fourth beat is missed and just strummed/picked open.

Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

Ah, good stuff! by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #14 Thu May 11, 2006 at 01:38:20 PM EST
Right now, I'm still at the chord - 2 - 3 - 4- chord - 2 - 3 - 4 etc. stage, but am hoping to improve this... soon.

That, and learning to do typing first, practising last. My poor, poor sodding fingers

[ Parent ]
i think you have to be classically by cam (2.00 / 0) #20 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:21:53 PM EST
Trained to be able to do 1234 1234. I think it was leo kottke in acoustic guitar that didn't care if his playing was clean or not, and his stuff sounds awesome.

Dirty playing with open strings, clicks because the string is muted by the left or right hand, or even just a hanging unmuted note are more interesting than perfectly clean guitar.

Look forward to your mixing of electronica and guitar fuzz in future MFCs.

Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

[ Parent ]
Ah, the joys of being classically trained by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #23 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:27:20 PM EST
It made learning jazz trumpet after 11 years of hardcore classical... interesting ;)

Agreed about perfect, clean guitar sounding... well, it sounds flat frankly. Don't like it, so have been attempting to get dirtier, but controlled dirtiness. Christ, when have I ever gone for that?

Have been thinking of how/when/what-in-God's-name-it's-going-to-sound-like  with my, err, style. Have recently bought a distortion pedal that I'm hoping to break garageband with. It shall be... interesting ;)

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The training by skippy (2.00 / 0) #27 Thu May 11, 2006 at 03:34:27 PM EST
I always did contemporary piano, which helped a lot when I switched up to jazz during highschool.  Plus working with chords for years made learning guitar easier than it otherwise would have been.  That, and having played the ukelele for several years back in elementary school - that solved the whole strumming/picking side of the equation before I even started learning the chords for the guitar.

Distortion-wise, it's too bad you already bought a pedal.  Otherwise I would say bust out a soldering iron and try to borrow a copy of Craig Anderton's "Electronic Projects for Musicians".  I made the "tube-sound fuzz" project from there between highschool and university - my first ever experiment with soldering.  It has to be one of the nastiest-sounding fuzz pedals I have ever used.  Whether or not that's the design or just my [then non-existant] soldering skills, I'm not sure.

The character of the distortion completely changes depending on the strength of the battery.  It's entirely possible that I soldered something wrong, because I've found that with a brand-new battery I have to create a partial high-resistance ground loop (or something?) by putting my bare foot on the metal shield of the out plug while playing and resting part of my strumming hand on the... uh... bridge, I think it is.  The metal dealie that holds the strings.  By varying the amount of contact between the cable/my body/the guitar, on a fresh battery I can have the system make squealing/screeching sounds which can be frequency modulated down to middle or even low frequencies (sounds like a growling/thumping coming from the amp).  The best battery for the setup that requires the least amount of fuss is a half-drained rechargeable 9V.

Wow, that was rambly.a

[ Parent ]
best EP evar by cam (2.00 / 0) #28 Thu May 11, 2006 at 03:46:12 PM EST
Superfuzz Bigmuff by Mudhoney. I recall seeing circuit diagrams for bigmuffs in the old guitar magazines 20 years ago, I am sure the internets have them.

Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

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Hey, a budding rawker! by Eveley (2.00 / 0) #18 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:19:19 PM EST
I have a few questions. Feel free to ignore them completely.

Are you just running through basic open chords for now, or do you practice scales as well? Are you following a course or just choosing what you want to play by yourself?

An advice: It is said that the best is to start out with a classical Spanish nylon-stringed guitar, since the finger-setting is a bit harder due to the wider neck. Ignore them. I assume you have a guitar but when buying your next one, try every guitar in the shop and take the one most comfortable to you (in your price range, of course.) Electric, acoustic, it doesn't matter. You should be one with your guitar.

I started (at age 12) with a nylon and learned the basic chords on that. After a long period of not really playing I borrowed a cheap Chinese-made "Stratocaster" (affectionately called the 'Crapstrat') from a friend three years ago when I was 24 - I still have it, and it's what I really learned playing on.

As an example and possible motivation: After three years of undiciplined practice (listening to songs and trying to play them) this is what I'm almost able to play today. The rushes are a bit too much still, but I'm getting there.

If you have a grain of self-dicipline you'll be able to do that in a couple of years at the most :)

Hehe by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #22 Thu May 11, 2006 at 02:23:14 PM EST
Right now, I'm taking lessons from some hippy rocking teacher. So far, this is consisting of spending half my time practising moving from a barre chord to a power to a crazy 7 plus 9 plus 11 plus argh my head hurts and back again. Well, generally moving about the guitar neck making chords like that.

Then, I spend the rest practising basic solo techniques. Real basics, hammer-on, pull-offs, vibrato etc.

So far, is fun, and treating myself to an old Fender made-in-mehico strat hasn't hurt ;)

I look forward to rocking as per your sample, rawk!

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Cool. by Eveley (2.00 / 0) #29 Thu May 11, 2006 at 04:10:15 PM EST
I admire the dedication to more or less structured practice as it's impossible for me to find it myself :)

Wanking all over the fretboard has been my approach. What the chords are called I have no idea of apart from the basic open ones. Don't ask me where a Dsus4 is, it's all become a combination of intuition and memory. Probably why things are going so... slow.

You've made a good choice of guitar. Strats are wonderfully easy to play and abuse, and the Mexico-produced ones aren't bad -- myself, I now caress a slightly worn 1964 Gibson SG Jr inherited a few months ago. Good old P-90 soapbar loveliness ;)

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+1 fretwanking by Breaker (2.00 / 0) #35 Fri May 12, 2006 at 01:01:40 AM EST
HuSi MFC needs YOU, sir!

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Next time, gadget -- next tiiiime... by Eveley (2.00 / 0) #36 Fri May 12, 2006 at 04:26:18 AM EST
I'll try and get my butt off the PHP chair and record something for the next MFC.

I suck at composing, though, but hey it's the music FUN challenge, right :)

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Good work fella by Breaker (2.00 / 0) #38 Fri May 12, 2006 at 06:39:57 AM EST
Yeah, the M*F*C is all about the fun.  And the music.

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Poll... by Alice Pulley (4.00 / 1) #33 Thu May 11, 2006 at 11:37:18 PM EST
...oh yes, waking up confused in 16* yr olds bedroom then walking downstairs to meet the parents was fun.

My most favourite confused morning was in Dublin. Was in the Guiness Brewery hostel in a mixed dorm. Attractive Australian lass and beefy bf were in the bunks opposite. Woke up bleary headed, opened eyes to findy beefy staring directly at me from his top bunk. Realised his gf was in bed with me. I, Scared and confused. He, left hostel shortly after. She, went on to sleep with another of the group I was with, then later  explained to us both via email she had an STD. Beautiful story, Disney have option on script.

*Fingers crossed.


'But they're adults and perfectly capable of working it out themselves. And if not, well, fuck em.' - Nebbish '06.

Poll by Phage (2.00 / 0) #34 Fri May 12, 2006 at 12:25:11 AM EST

Dude, like, no way! | 39 comments (39 topical, 0 hidden)