Print Story Well, you could knock me down with a feather
By Cloaked User (Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 03:12:50 AM EST) life, PC, DIY, work, lazy good-for-nothing sperm (all tags)
A personal thank you from the client, communicated via our MD, as requested when he was at a do with some rather high-level people. That gave me a nice, warm glow for at least 5 seconds. Maybe 10, tops.

Inside: Test results! I want my house back! Upgrade trials and triumphs! Tonight!

Test results
So, we had our first IVF consultation a few days ago, where we were given the results of my sperm test. The lazy little fuckers are apparently asleep on the job; in fact the result was so bad, I have to do another one in a few weeks just to make sure it wasn't just a one-off. If it isn't, then we're going to have to have the procedure that most people think of when you say "IVF", ie direct injection of a sperm into the egg.

On the plus side, that particular procedure actually ups our chances of success, so in a way it's a good thing.

I want my house back
We're redecorating with a vengeance at the moment. That means lots of bare plaster walls, half-finished doorways as doors and frames are removed then replaced, missing skirting board, bare floors, dangling wires - you name it, if it makes the place look like a building site, it's happening. It'll all be worth it by the time it's finished, but I really can't wait for that time to come. Still, the woodworking and electrics will be finished in the next few days and the new flooring is being fitted a week or so later, and I'm taking some time off next week to get the decorating finished. Not long now; then there's just the upstairs rooms to do...

Upgrade trials and triumphs
I finally got my upgrade ordered. With a little deft swapping around of exact models of components, I managed to afford both the pair of hard drives and the two gig of RAM, thus satisfying all of my technolust for a full on geekgasm. I couldn't get a new case like I'd wanted to, but that can wait.

The final spec was:

  • Gigabyte K8N PRO SLI motherboard¹
  • Athlon X2 4400+
  • two gig of Corsair Value RAM in a matched pair
  • two Maxtor DiamondMax +10 250GB SATA2 drives
  • a GeForce 7800GTX
  • a Hiper HPU-4K580 modular PSU
1 no plans to actually use the SLI capabilities, but the price was right even ignoring that

I had a frustrating couple of evenings trying to install XP to a striped RAID array. I had slip-streamed the required drivers into an XP Pro install CD, and it installed, but blue screened on booting to Windows. Everything was fine installing to one of my old IDE drives², so I tried installing to a single SATA drive. That was fine, and appears to have revealed the problem - on logging in to Windows, it bitched about a missing source file for the NVidia RAID driver. Looks like I fucked up the slip-streaming process. Never mind, I'll give it another go at the weekend.

2 apart from losing some data I actually meant to keep in the process - d'oh!

Apart from that, the system is fantastic. I've not really put it through its paces, but in a brief play with UT 2004 it handled everything at max at 1600x1200 with no noticeable slowdown. In fact, at first I didn't believe that the resolution change had taken effect.

Now all I have to do is get the damn thing set up properly...

Tonight I'm taking a well-earned rest from work, DIY and the PC and meeting up for drinks 'n' dinner with Cute Receptionist. Now I know what you're thinking, but her boyfriend and my fiancée and daughter will be there, so you can cut that right out. Should be good though - we've been meaning to meet up for absolutely ages, but could never seem to find a time when we could all make it.

< Moment 25 | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
Well, you could knock me down with a feather | 21 comments (21 topical, 0 hidden)
So by jump the ladder (4.00 / 9) #1 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 03:17:53 AM EST
how do you know the first kid is yours then if your sperm are lazy sods? Or does virilty suddenly stoip past 25?

oh SHI by webwench (2.00 / 0) #16 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 11:56:00 AM EST
who else isn't surprised? by garlic (4.00 / 6) #2 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 03:37:12 AM EST
the best way for cloaked user to have children with his fiance does not include him having sex with his fiance.

I think it'd be best, by ambrosen (4.00 / 3) #3 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 03:42:35 AM EST
if he were to pay for someone else to be the surrogate father by the traditional method of insemination.

[ Parent ]
My name's Rogerborg, and I'm by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #6 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 04:58:58 AM EST
Reporting for duty

Reporting for duty.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

[ Parent ]
Not to be a bastard. by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #8 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 05:05:03 AM EST
Oh shit, well I'd better not write this comment, then. Here goes, anyway:

Maybe the PEF gets such an elevated level of commitment because she is every bit as attractive as his enthusiasm says.

That's it, if in doubt, write it in such a convoluted manner no one could understand it anyway.

[ Parent ]
Borg-sense tingling! by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #9 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 05:54:55 AM EST
Someone is being trolled!  But who?  I have to think, dammit.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
I think, by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #11 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 06:14:09 AM EST
but obviously I'm far too nice to say it, even if I'm in a pissed off and bitter mood, I was implying PEF may be a minger.

[ Parent ]
Ah, I read it the other way by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #12 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 07:19:16 AM EST
After the amount of public emasculation that she's put him through, I'd expect that she'd better be librarian hot.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
My brothers are both librarians. by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #13 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 07:33:01 AM EST
Well, the one with the waist length blond hair's technically only a library assistant, but you see where I'm coming from.

[ Parent ]
Then they're "library-guys" by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #14 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 09:08:54 AM EST
Only broads and monkeys can be librarians.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
I think you'll find by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #15 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 11:05:34 AM EST
He's an Orang-Utan

[ Parent ]
So it's true? by webwench (4.00 / 1) #17 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 11:58:11 AM EST
That a guy will put up with any level of batshit-crazy if the girl's good-enough looking?

Color me unsurprised.

"some days it just doesn't pay to chew through the straps." - clock

[ Parent ]
Dunno by jump the ladder (4.00 / 1) #18 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 12:55:36 PM EST
I think most women are batshit-insane from a bloke's point of view (and vice-versa is true also). It's just a matter of degree.

[ Parent ]
My life is nothing if not ironic (n/t) by Cloaked User (4.00 / 1) #4 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 04:29:53 AM EST

This is not a psychotic episode. It is a cleansing moment of clarity.
[ Parent ]
What sort of knickers do you wear? by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #5 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 04:37:22 AM EST
Loose ones are best for sperm health, so toss the tightie whities and boxer briefs.

I have an idea how to increase your sperm count by Rogerborg (4.00 / 9) #7 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 05:00:17 AM EST
Ask your fiancée - nicely - if you can have your testicles back.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
Or by Breaker (4.00 / 1) #10 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 06:00:49 AM EST
A few dinners here (NSFWFUP)  might put a bit of spark in your spermatazoa.

[ Parent ]
question by yankeehack (2.00 / 0) #19 Fri Feb 17, 2006 at 02:30:20 PM EST
how much unprotected sex have you been having to figure out that certain parties needed to go to a specialist?
"...she dares to indulge in the secret sport. You can't be a MILF with the F, at least in part because the M is predicated upon it."-CBB
You really think Cloaked User is getting by debacle (2.00 / 0) #20 Sun Feb 19, 2006 at 05:21:23 PM EST
unprotected sex?

More than likely the IVF is a result of the most efficiency cockblocking campaign evar!


[ Parent ]
Answer by Cloaked User (2.00 / 0) #21 Mon Feb 20, 2006 at 04:58:10 AM EST
A fair amount, to be honest. In fact, I can only remember the two of us having protected sex a couple of times in the eight years or so that we've been together.

We don't have sex quite as often as I'd like, it's true, but neither are we celibate.

This is not a psychotic episode. It is a cleansing moment of clarity.

[ Parent ]
Well, you could knock me down with a feather | 21 comments (21 topical, 0 hidden)