Print Story okay, so i've totally quit and everything,
By rmg (Tue Feb 14, 2006 at 06:24:59 PM EST) environmentalism, trolling, rmg (all tags)
but i was looking through my old slashdot posts, which aren't too remarkable in general, i admit, and i came across this one:

i'm telling you, people, they don't make 'em like this anymore. if only i had the karma bonus at the time... also, notice that none of the respondants called me a troll, despite talking about moon bases, intergalactic missile defense, and a senile reagan quote.

annotated text below:

here's a special treat for all of you who think i am boring, which is to say those of you who, like slashdot readers, are too obtuse to understand my sense of humor: i'm going to annotate one of my trolls so you see what's going on.

Global Warming is a serious threat.
(Score:3, Insightful) [damn right.]
by the talented rmg (812831) on Tuesday March 01, @08:46PM (#11819396)

With winters getting warmer every year, it's only a matter of time before we are up to our necks in industrially poisoned ocean. Glaciers are receeding at an alarming rate and El Nino [irrelevant] only makes matters worse.

It's interesting, though, that with all the talk from liberal groups like the Sierra Club about how industry [use of parallel language to highlight contradiction with previous paragraph] is the culprit, that we come to find out that it might be the SUN ITSELF that's depleting the ozone layer [subtle: not the same as global warming]! In the wake of the recent CBS debacle [completely gratuitous political remark -- nearly all of my slashdot posts contain at least one], maybe it's time we started viewing such activists with a more suspicious eye [joke/weirdness: CBS's logo is an eye -- my posts are full of things like this].

Maybe it's time we stopped looking for more problems on earth, and start looking to controlling threats from outer space [nearly a direct quote from a famous Reagan speech] -- threats like solar storms and asteroids [irrelevant, but vaguely connected to article -- my favorite type of offtopic nonsense]. With our current level of intercelestial preparedness, it would take only one oversized meteor or a solar storm to fry this intergalactic [repetion of lexical elements] backwater [hgtg] we call earth to a crisp. We need to step up efforts to expand orbital missile defense [recall: this article is about global warming] and lunar and martian defense outposts [i've suggested we expand such outposts] or we'll have only ourselves to blame when some freak cosmic event destroys life as we know it.

i would like to draw the reader's attention to the surrealistic elements of the above post. it is my expert opinion that surrealism is one of the single most effective and entertaining tactics in oppressive moderation environments. it allows a radical degree of freedom in subject matter, throws the idiocy of biters into greater relief, and confuses biters and moderators alike, deterring negative moderation and increasing the hilarity of responses -- unfortunately, since this is a slashdot post, all of the responses are the same, but generally, one gets more amusing responses using this tactic.

unfortunately, slashdot trolling is too labor intensive (constantly looking for a new article, having to think of something to troll about even when you don't know anything about the topic at hand, and then write the damn thing in under three minutes) for me and i'm really too busy for any sort of serious trolling -- except dailykos diary trolling (which i highly recommend to anyone with the creativity and cleverness for it). my most recent works there have used surrealism (particularly in the sense of brecht) to very good effect. of course, my skill in impersonation of females and ability to create a convincing narrative voice are crucial to my success and i wouldn't expect any of you to be able to replicate it. even so, i would be interested to read any works of active dailykos trolls, so shoot me a gmail if you have any good material.

by the way, i've been particularly interested in wikipedia trolling these days. some of you may be aware of the outstanding work of "deeceevoice." i particularly recommend to troll afficianados "her" works surrounding the semi- and especially super-conductivity of melanin and its connection to "soul." if anyone has contacts within the wikipedia trolling community or any knowledge about it, i'd be interested to hear about it.

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okay, so i've totally quit and everything, | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden)
+1 FP by gzt (4.00 / 1) #1 Tue Feb 14, 2006 at 07:43:21 PM EST

indeed by theantix (2.00 / 0) #2 Tue Feb 14, 2006 at 11:05:46 PM EST
The term "global warming" is in itself a pretty stupid term, as after all the sun is doing the warming.

I Like Layered Texts. by CheeseburgerBrown (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 01:12:05 AM EST
You should submit this to some rabbis and get a swaddling layer of commentary. Everybody loves more commentary.

I am from a small, unknown country in the north called Ca-na-da. We are a simple, grease-loving people who enjoy le weekend de ski.
-1 PLZMV2HLKTHX by BadDoggie (4.00 / 1) #4 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 03:24:27 AM EST
It's one thing to be drunk and revel in the past glory of certain comments or scribblings. It's another to tell the world you're doing it.

It's even worse when you think you have to point out every trollish feature in a particular post to the people who didn't bite.


OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

oh please. by rmg (4.00 / 1) #7 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 04:00:01 AM EST
number one, the fact that someone didn't bite doesn't mean they're smart or savvy. it just means they didn't read the post. no one who read and understood my comment failed to bite on it. indeed, the main reason for not biting my trolls is just not getting it.

secondly, you and i both know that no one would have noticed the eye joke if i hadn't pointed it out. readers have just learned of a new dimension to my writing. it's like finding out there's a cane hidden in each page of where's waldo after you've already memorized the locations of waldo -- everything becomes new once again.

[t]rolling retards conversation, period.

[ Parent ]
Wow. by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #5 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 03:46:53 AM EST
You have a really high slashdot UID, n00b.

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

i have another around 10000, by rmg (4.00 / 1) #6 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 03:55:44 AM EST
but i don't use it anymore.

[t]rolling retards conversation, period.
[ Parent ]
that's what i want to know! by rmg (4.00 / 1) #9 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 01:56:33 PM EST
that guy was a master. people say he quit, but no one really quits, as we all know perfectly well.

[t]rolling retards conversation, period.
spectacular, you say? by rmg (4.00 / 1) #11 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 02:32:09 PM EST
that must be quite a rumor.

[t]rolling retards conversation, period.
[ Parent ]
so hard-core he only needed two letters. by gzt (4.00 / 1) #12 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 10:26:08 PM EST
i mean, jiminy.

[ Parent ]
okay, so i've totally quit and everything, | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden)