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Awesome Elements of "Attack of the Clones"

By tps12 (Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:02:49 AM EST) Star Wars, Attack of the Clones, centipedes, monsters, bugs (all tags)

Element 1

Ewwwwww.

The Killer Gigantic Centipedes are IMHO some of the creepiest characters to appear in a Star Wars film, in no small part because they are based on the creepiest characters in real life.

Real, everyday centipedes drain their prey of blood. They are born looking like adult centipedes, only smaller. And they hunt in packs, just like velociraptors. No movie monster can really match that in pure scariness terms, but these things come close.

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Awesome Elements of "Attack of the Clones" | 40 comments (40 topical, 0 hidden)

Frist Post! by 606 (2.00 / 0) #1 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:06:32 AM EST

oh no not again...

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imagine dancing banana here

I don't remember these by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 1) #2 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:07:25 AM EST

Did I get to the theater late?

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You might have gone to0 early by georgeha (4.00 / 2) #4 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:14:59 AM EST

Lucas added them digitally a few months into the theater run, as a developer at ILM came up with a new centipede algorithm, and Lucas wanted to try it out.

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Raid shot first! by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 2) #8 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:28:07 AM EST

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: shoot han first! by monkeymind (4.00 / 1) #12 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:37:18 AM EST

then work through the rest of the cast.

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possibly by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #5 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:16:40 AM EST

These guys were used to try to assassinate Senator Amidala right before the opening chase sequence. Looks like chapter six on the DVD.

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Oh wait, is that her bedroom? by DesiredUsername (2.00 / 0) #6 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:20:44 AM EST

That's not a giant centipede, that's a regular centipede.

And yes, totally ripped off from Star Trek, as are many other SW elements.

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yes, it's her bedroom by tps12 (4.00 / 1) #9 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:30:00 AM EST

Didn't you notice the My Little Dewback bedsheets?

As for Star Wars having somehow ripped off Trek, the first episode of which, "Encounter at Farscape," aired several years after the third Wars installment and nearly a decade after A New Hope...well, I'm not biting.

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: (nt) by DesiredUsername (2.00 / 0) #11 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:32:00 AM EST

Nice Try

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You uncultured callow youth! by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #3 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:12:59 AM EST

Charitably, one could say Lucas is paying Homage to the first really good Star Trek film, Ricardo's Wrath, where Ricardo picks up some small centipede like critters and shoves it up Sulu's ear, where it enters his head and crawls around his brain, driving him crazy!

Less charitably, you could say he stole the idea. To not mention it at all reveals a seriously lacking foundation in filmed science fiction.

good point by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #7 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:22:30 AM EST

Obviously, I must have repressed memories of what is truly one of the more disturbing scenes in movie history. In Lucas's defense, his space-o-pedes don't burrow into people's brains. In my defense, well, what can I say, I'm uncultured, callow, and urban.

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How do you know? by DullTrev (4.00 / 1) #18 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:08:03 AM EST

They got killed too soon.

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DFJ?

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: I don't think by monkeymind (2.00 / 0) #24 Tue May 31, 2005 at 12:02:20 PM EST

They were going to burrow into her Brain

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Wow by theantix (4.00 / 1) #10 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:31:13 AM EST

You've just highlighted something fairly interesting to me -- I can't recall a single scene in Attack of the Clones. I'm sure I saw it, but the whole thing was so forgettable that I can't isolate any particular element in it. Or maybe I didn't see it after all. I sure remember the first one...

_{Sure, you've got the facts on your side -- but that's just your opinion.}

I remember two things by MillMan

(2.00 / 0) #13 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:38:24 AM EST

Yoda fighting with Dooku, and Yoda saying "around the survivors a perimeter create."

Now that I'm thinking about it I remember a few more things, but I don't remember the plot at all.

"Just as there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no libertarians in financial crises." -Krugman

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around the survivors a perimeter create by monkeymind (2.00 / 0) #17 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:02:36 AM EST

my god how I begged for someone with a decent sniper rifle after that. sure yoda would be dead but it is no biger timeline screw up than Lucas has already made.

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I dont understand by MillMan

(2.00 / 0) #26 Tue May 31, 2005 at 03:12:00 PM EST

what you mean by this.

"Just as there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no libertarians in financial crises." -Krugman

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In the beginning... by monkeymind (2.00 / 0) #27 Tue May 31, 2005 at 04:37:46 PM EST

Yoda was teh bomb, sometimes he got his syntax wrong, sometimes he was correct. A bit like someone who had learnt English late in life and made the occasional mistake. Much like my yoga sensei, who did not learn English until her 40's.

EPI-III. Yoda got it wrong the same way every time. What had been endearing became tedious. This is my basic problem with the second serious. It all became very formulaic. when he said the perimeter line I thought. 'That's it kill him now, I am over this'

Lucas went to so much effort to tie things up and ended up making plot holes that you could fly a star destroyer through

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I'd fly my star destroyer by debacle (2.00 / 0) #38 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 04:30:50 PM EST

Through Lucas' plot holes any day.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

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Now that's by monkeymind (2.00 / 0) #39 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 04:34:01 PM EST

A euphemism I have not come across before.

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: Perhaps you should come across by debacle (4.00 / 1) #40 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 04:43:03 PM EST

My euphemism more often.
;-)
IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

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Wow by theantix (2.00 / 0) #19 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:20:15 AM EST

I'm really starting to think that I've not seen it and just assumed that I had. Or, I blocked it from my memory.

_{Sure, you've got the facts on your side -- but that's just your opinion.}

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Surely you remember the by DesiredUsername (2.00 / 0) #14 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:39:52 AM EST

released-straight-to-video-game factory scene! And the "Muppets flung across the stage == martial arts" scene! And the "Gladiator did well, can we work a coliseum into the our space epic" scene!

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in that case by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #15 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:45:22 AM EST

You're sure to benefit from my diary for the next couple days!

Seriously, the concept for this series of diaries was inspired by a recent viewing of the movie, and realizing that, while there isn't a lot in there that's exactly memorable, there's a fair few elements that are indisputably awesome. And no, Battle Yoda is not one of them.

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How is that not one of them? by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #20 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:33:51 AM EST

Three movies of a guy hobbling around with a cane then all of a sudden he goes woop-ass crazy. And that's NOT cool?

And for those that say it wouldn't be possible, my mom's cat begs to differ. (Waiting for the snickers to die down.) She's old and frumpy and walks like it hurts, then she decides it's time to play and she bounces around like a little kitten. So, having seen that, Yoda going from gimpy old dude to ass-kicking flippy-bitch was perfectly reasonable.

Fuck the nay-sayers. Yoda battling was almost as cool as R2 handing those two big droids they rear cams in EP. III.

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

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it just isn't by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #22 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:57:07 AM EST

Trust me.

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I detect bullshit. by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #25 Tue May 31, 2005 at 12:14:53 PM EST

And I hereby declare you unfit to wear George Lucas's Jock ~~on your face, even~~.

The only two battles that were cooler throughout the movies were Darth Maul's vs. Obi + Qui Gon and Anakin vs. Obi. Maybe equal to Yoda vs Palps, but only on comedic value. (I mean, come on, Palps head first suplex style into the chair? I wanted to start chanting E-C-W! E-C-W!)

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

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i think by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #28 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 02:36:14 AM EST

You and I may have very different standards when it comes to deciding the Awesomeness of fights. Qui-Gon vs. Maul was a stinker, IMO.

Anyway, I'm not saying that Battle Yoda isn't funny or entertaining, just that he is no Awesome Element.

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WTF? by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #29 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 03:50:12 AM EST

So, the fight scene that wins "Best Saber Duel" for the entire series is a stinker? What kind of crack are you taking? For gord's sake, the actor playing Maul actually had martial arts training so he knew what he was doing, and you could tell it.

Granted, Christopher Lee probably has more on-screen sword fighting experience than anyone else alive today, and his on-screen duel in EP III really wasn't all that. But I blame editing for that.

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

[ Parent ]

eh, well by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #30 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 04:04:23 AM EST

The actors are not good enough (even if Maul was trained in martial arts, Liam Neeson isn't exactly a black belt) and there is not enough ridiculous wirework to make the fights impressive to me on a technical level. Best Saber Duel? Maybe. But "sand is rough and dry, you are soft and moist" might well be the series' Most Romantic Line, and I'm not about to grant it Awesomeness based solely on its superlativity.

The fight is a stinker because it's overly self-conscious and predictable. What should be an emotional high point of the film is devoid of any suspense, and the choreography alone is not enough to save it. The scene really picks up once Qui-Gon bites it, though.

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Wow. by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #31 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 04:15:16 AM EST

What crap. Just so your aware, my "Best Saber Duel" comment was not my own. That's taken from several different online polls I've seen on the issue. So you may be alone in your feeling about this.

Frankly, there's few moments cooler in the entire series than Maul's initial saber light-up. And from that moment until the end of the duel, where Maul smiles, then suddenly looks like he's thinking "oh, shit," then he's toasted, is one big bad-ass battle. The music even adds to the drama. How you can feel no emotion during that is beyond me. (And one of your qualifiers is ridiculous wire-work? Yikes.)

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

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it takes all kinds by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #32 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 05:16:19 AM EST

We have different tastes, and I doubt either of us would change them based on opinion polls. Let's just agree that what the series really needed was a Master Jar-Jar and leave it at that.

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This I can agree with. by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #33 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 05:21:06 AM EST

Funny thing about that. I'd heard originally that the plan was to make him a Jedi Master. Now, all the people that bitched and moaned that they wanted to see Jar Jar die bitched so much that they had him relegated to a smaller role so as not to annoy the fanbase. But, if they would have just shut the fuck up about him, he would have been a Jedi Master at the time of the slaughter, and all Jedi save two were killed. So, see, if people would have just let it be, they could have seen him killed. Instead, he survived, to annoy them another day.

To which I say, good. They deserve it. I liked Jar Jar, and think that the new TV series should be based on his entire life.

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

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hm by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #34 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 05:28:03 AM EST

Was this comment the only place you'd heard that? If so, then I'm sorry to report that I was joking about that being in the original screenplay (not that it would surprise or disappoint me to find out that that was the case). If not, then, well, awesome.

I would watch a Jar Jar show. I really would.

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Nope. by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #35 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 06:03:49 AM EST

I actually heard this around the time of Episode I being released. The plan was to keep Jar Jar fairly prominent in the entire trilogy, giving him the rank of master around the same time the whole scene of Anakin being denied the rank of master, thus making Anakin even MORE angry with the Jedi. Frankly, I think that would have added a whole lot more depth to the entire turn angle. But, supposedly, Lucas heard about the fan backlash to Jar Jar as a character, and slowly phased him out.

Which pisses me right off. Jedi Master Jar Jar would have fucking ROCKED. Damn would that have rocked.

___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave

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wow by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #36 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 06:09:49 AM EST

I must have absorbed that idea into my subconscious and then regurgitated it thinking it was an original thought.

Goddamn Lucas for caving to fan pressure.

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: No shit. by Lost In A Dream (2.00 / 0) #37 Wed Jun 01, 2005 at 06:13:37 AM EST

Not only would Jar Jar Jedi Master have been the coolest thing ever, but can you imagine the confrontation scene? Supposedly one of the final elements of the turn was Anakin's confrontation of Jar Jar, ending in Jar Jar's spectacular death. Now there's a saber duel that could have knocked Maul out of number one. Jar Jar vs Anakin. The possibility of those floppy ear-fins as Jar Jar flipped and flew around the room. . .
Ah, what might have been.
___________________________________
. . .What you want in a marriage is, something like that town in Pennsylvania that's built over a burning seam of coal.". -- ti dave
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:( by infinitera (2.00 / 0) #21 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:38:40 AM EST

Battle Yoda is definately the only one.

Unfortunately, my plan to handle stress with thrice-daily blowjobs keeps getting shot down. — ucblockhead

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: sorry, you're wrong by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #23 Tue May 31, 2005 at 11:58:08 AM EST

The scene is amusing, but ultimately claptrap, and decidedly not Awesome.

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I only remember one scene by The Fool (4.00 / 1) #16 Tue May 31, 2005 at 10:58:14 AM EST

And that's when Natalie Portman gets her clothes ripped off by animals.

Sadly, no hot grits were included in the shot.

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Awesome Elements of "Attack of the Clones" | 40 comments (40 topical, 0 hidden)