Print Story Brained by Falling Masonry
Furries
By MohammedNiyalSayeed (Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 07:36:27 AM EST) (all tags)
I never thought you'd go so far
chloroform
I never thought you'd go so far oh no
she's out cold now
I'm so alone now take that back please stephanie black
and don't be so torn by chloroform


Friday, we went to see Jarhead.

It was OK, but not violent enough.

Puppies Are Coming To Visit

It's either this Friday night, or Saturday during the day, that my Mom and Dad are coming to visit, and bringing with them my adorable little puppy sister and brother. The pups will be staying with me for 9 whole days, and I'm greatly looking forward to it. I do, however, need to puppy-proof the house, lifting some cables up out of puppy-chewing reach, and generally moving stuff around and cleaning a bit. Woohoo!

Parents Are Meeting la mia Barista

One side benefit (by which I mean that I am more thrilled about the puppy visit than I am this) is that Mom and Dad will be meeting Miss la mia Barista. I've told them she's younger than me, but that was some time ago, back when I thought it was going to be a dealbreaker in the long term field. At least they won't be surprised. Really, though, I expect it to go fairly well. My parents are easy to get along with, and so is lmB, so what could possibly go wrong? I mean, as long as she loves puppies, and she does... Speaking of which, the parents will be coming back from my brother's house a day before Thanksgiving, and spending the holiday here, so lmB and I are thinking it might be nice to have Thanksgiving dinner at her parents', with my parents, the puppies, and her parents' doggie. All out party in Chapel Thrill!

I don't know how well her parents' dog and my little brother puppy will get along. He can be kinda grouchy sometimes, particularly when meeting dogs he doesn't know. We'll see, I guess.

How About A Nice, Steaming Cup of STFU?

Somehow, I got volunteered to construct a wiki and blog server for work. That's right, a wiki and blog server. Utterly fucking pointless, but whatever, the CEO wants it, so until I am getting paid by someone else, I'll do it.

Now, mind you, I'm not in the habit of working on weekends any more. I'm salaried, and I'm on call, so if something breaks, and it's an emergency of some sort, I'll fix it, but project work can wait until Mondays. ${newBigBoss} is generally just not around during the week, much less during market hours, so it's not unusual to get email from him asking about the status of shit late in the evening, which, during the week, I generally answer when I get them. This weekend, though, at 4:00pm market close, I shut down my AIM client, and categorically refused to open it again until Monday morning. I checked email every 3 minutes, as usual, but any work email got put aside until Monday. During this time period, ${newBigBoss} send three emails asking about the status of the wiki/blog server, in increasing amounts of desparation to find out what he wanted to find out.

ATTENTION NEWBIGBOSS MOTHERFUCKER: STATUS IS AS FOLLOWS:

SAME AS IT WAS ON FRIDAY, AT FUCKING MARKET CLOSE. IT'S THE FUCKING WEEKEND, YOU TWIT. I REFUSE TO WORK ON THIS SHIT DURING WHAT I CONSIDER TO BE "MY TIME". TOO BAD FOR YOU, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT, BITCH??? THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT! NOW FUCK OFF!

That was the first draft. I went through eight of those until I finally got rid of the obscenities, then sent it. Apparently, it was still pretty strongly worded, as I got an apologetic "Sorry, I wasn't trying to pester you, and I don't expect you to work on the weekends" email. Best defense? GOOD OFFENSE!

I've Got Nothing Nice To Say

It's a love song, inverted, to ex-veterinarian gf. Man, hate songs: so much easier to write than love songs! Also, I used the newly-implemented "podcast" functionality of Apple's blojsom-based weblog server. As such, RSS-using infidels may now subscribe to my "podcast" via this handy-dandy URL. Buy my mp3s! Or download them for free, but only if you want to. Also, they are not for sale, as I keeps it REAL. Realer than real.

I have a new baby neice!

That's why my parents are dropping the dogs off. After they do that, they're driving up to the Washington DC/Baltimore, MD area to meet my new little hair-covered neice. Well, not hair-covered, but she has a lot of hair on her head. Enough that, were I my brother, I would be checking the mailman out to make sure I was really the dad. I'd post a picture of her, but I can't be arsed.

France.

I've been reading a lot about the situation in France, running the gamut from Thomas Crampton (posting at Joi Ito's site, whom I normally disagree with on almost any and everything) who is currently in France (also: obligatory link to CK Prahalad's "The Fortune at the Bottom of the Pyramid" goes here, as a reminder to myself to buy it and read it). Jay at hiphopmusic.com is obsessing over his own misperception of what's going on, and how, although the vast majority of the participants may be Islamic in background, it's really just a race/class riot. I can't help but wonder, were the rioters Christian in background, if he wouldn't feel the need to discredit the connection between their religious background and their behavior.

Ultimately, it's a poverty problem. Why the fuck that's the government's responsibility to address is beyond me, but France is a Cradle to Grave welfare state, and I don't understand that, either. It seems to me if you want to wage a war on poverty, it'd behoove you to address the real problem, rather than looking for excuses why that problem exists. Sadly, it seems no one has the balls to call for wiping out poor people. If you get rid of poor people, poverty ceases to be a problem. Allow me to say it; IT'S TIME WE START GETTING RID OF POOR PEOPLE. You may think that's just plain evil, but you can shove it up your ass; I don't need you forcing your fucking morals on me. These are mine.

Iraq

OK

I suppose I should probably get back to scrambling the contents of my last week's "task list" to get ready for this week's developer conference call, the bulk of which I plan to spend browsing dice for jobs and such. And, of course, with half a pizza for dinner last night, followed by delicious Cottonwood Pumpkin Ale after delicious Cottonwood Pumpkin Ale (x6), I expect I'll be making THE POOPS shortly. Woohoo! My plans for Taco Hell yesterday were foiled by MillMan's subversive Wendy's suggestion, so perhaps I shall facilitate the making of poops by going to Taco Bell now. Who knows? I LIVE ON THE EDGE, FUCKERS!

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Brained by Falling Masonry | 35 comments (35 topical, 0 hidden)
I'll take "Cyrano de Bergerac" to block by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #1 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 07:44:29 AM EST
Killed from behind... by lackeys.

Say, on what end of the age curve do you and lmB fall?  Are we talking you spoon feeding her, or her spoon feeding you?

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

She's four by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #3 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:04:20 AM EST

And I'm 50-something. Er, wait, no, that's not it, she's 26 and I'm 36, so assuming she doesn't dump me sometime between now and my Golden Years, she'd be the one spoon feeding me.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
(36/2)+7 = 25 by Rogerborg (4.00 / 4) #6 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:15:09 AM EST
She's already past being ideal.  You've settled.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
There's always hope by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #13 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:45:37 AM EST

Eventually, she'll get tired of me. 100% of my track record bears this prediction out.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
But, dude, you're all political and stuff by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #16 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 09:03:08 AM EST
Either chicks flip for that shit, or South Park lied to me.  Which is more likely?

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
I smell the faint smell of ACCOUNT SWAPPERY! by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #19 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:15:36 AM EST

Though I could be entirely wrong...


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
You are entirely wrong by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #34 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:35:29 PM EST
But then he I would say that.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
dude you are doomed. by dev trash (4.00 / 2) #31 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 12:45:35 PM EST
My parents are 10 years apart and have been married for 33 years


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I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR BALLS! ->clock
[ Parent ]
The French need some poor people by georgeha (4.00 / 3) #2 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:01:59 AM EST
you need adorable poor waifs to be used as mistresses, and surly poor men to be surly waiters, a few political poor types to come up with the next flavor of socialism, and a few poor liberal arts sorts to come up with the next incarnation of deconstructionism.

But they probably have too many, perhaps they should license them.


The shortage of these things by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 2) #4 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:05:59 AM EST

could easily be addressed by robots. Just sayin'.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Yes, people do keep saying that by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #8 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:17:49 AM EST
But why can't I goof off while a robot does my work?  I mean, having to pretend to work is quite tiring.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
Dont forget by joh3n (4.00 / 1) #10 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:29:40 AM EST
the solemn accordion player!

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[ Parent ]
Speaking of which: by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 2) #14 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:46:54 AM EST
lol what by 606 (4.00 / 1) #17 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:13:04 AM EST
What the hell is up with "Tariq"? There's a Tariq that writes music reviews for the local hipster rag here. No last name, just Tariq. There must be some oblique sociopolitical reference I'm just not getting here.

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imagine dancing banana here
[ Parent ]
It's a fairly common name by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #18 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:14:32 AM EST

in some socio-religious circles. The protagonist-of-sorts of my NaNo thingy is named Tarek, a slight variation of the name, which I stole from a dude I knew in CS undergrad.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
yeah, but does he have a last name? by 606 (4.00 / 1) #21 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:20:56 AM EST
It's the no last name thing that really gets to me. I mean, how fucking pretentious can you be? Oh well I guess he does write for the snooty hipster mag. Pretty pretentious, I guess.

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imagine dancing banana here
[ Parent ]
Don't try to shove your values down his throat! by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #22 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:33:30 AM EST

YOU WILL RESPECT HIS ONE-NAME AUTHORITAH!


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Heh by Breaker (4.00 / 3) #5 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:09:52 AM EST
Buy my mp3s! Or download them for free, but only if you want to. Also, they are not for sale

For a minute there it was like 1998 all over again and I was about to offer you 10 million quid venture capital to help you set up a website.


Now accepting VC by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #15 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:48:30 AM EST

for NDA-release-only Top Secret Idea to build a time machine, then go back in time and dry up all the venture capital in 1998 with all sorts of crappy ideas for sale!


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
I think by Breaker (4.00 / 1) #29 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 12:32:29 PM EST
The money would be better spent on big fuckoff robots who can RTFO.

I mean, what would you prefer, pet food delivery or
an army of robots rocking their way to give us world dominance?

We could be facing a different, kinder future. 


[ Parent ]
in 1991 we fought a war in iraq by tps12 (4.00 / 2) #7 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:17:14 AM EST
It was OK, but not violent enough.

IAWTP by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #12 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:42:54 AM EST

And not in an ironical sense.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
"lmB and I are thinking it might be nice... by greyrat (4.00 / 2) #9 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:18:28 AM EST
...to have Thanksgiving dinner at her parents', with my parents, the puppies, and her parents' doggie."

WHAT!!! ARE YOU [redact]ING INSANE!!!!!
HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING FROM BEN STILLER'S MOVIE LIFE?!?!?!

You who about to die, sir, I salute you! Bonobo style!


I FEAR NOTHING! by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 2) #11 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 08:42:28 AM EST

I have learned, however, not to ever team up with someone whose special power is farting. Does that count?


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Wiki by 606 (4.00 / 1) #20 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:18:52 AM EST
It depends a lot on what your company does and what the development model is like, but at my company we found that having a project Wiki was a real lifesaver. We write documents there whenever we fight through a confusing piece of code and learn new stuff about it. Really informal stuff like "okay, here's what this shit is supposed to do...", or "utterly bizarre Internet Explorer errors I've seen and what to do about them".

It's tremendously helpful, especially if your Wiki has a search-in-text feature.

Just make sure the Wiki stays internal, and that the managers don't touch it or "clean it up".

As for project blogs? Well, we prefer time tracking and proper task management.

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imagine dancing banana here

We're entirely too small a company by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #23 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 10:35:37 AM EST

to be wasting time on such projects. As in, the entire dev team is a whopping 7 people, and the total number of employees is 12 or so. Everything we want it to do could be done with email. Were we to grow into a larger company, I could see some use in the projects (both), but as it is, it's kind of stupid.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
wasting time by 606 (4.00 / 1) #24 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 11:03:55 AM EST
Well how much work is it to set up a Wiki? Basically we just dumped a new copy of Moin-moin on a server somewheres and told folks to get at 'er. The page just sort of evolves over time. We've never had to clean it up or reorganize it. People just do that as they require.

To be honest though, the Wiki only became really useful when IT migrated to Exchange and fucked up out beautiful threaded searchable Linux-based e-mail list archive and replaced it with a single monolithic Outlook mailbox that doesn't do shit and is totally unusable.

But that is a story for another time...

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imagine dancing banana here

[ Parent ]
In this case by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #25 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 11:31:00 AM EST

It required MySQL, but not the MySQL that is packaged with Tiger Server, so there was hilarity involved in kludging it to work, then with setting up accounts for everyone using a name standardization strategy which, after it was all set up, everyone had to second guess, then bitch about the fact that I refused to start from scratch and follow retarded attempts to govern by committee, then getting it not to choke http auth with it's own kludge that used the same technique, only strangely, and, finally, now the html dude is bitching about the color scheme, about which I could not possibly care any less. Him: "You can't change the color of the logo, make it the correct orange." Me: "Apparently, I can change the color of the logo, because I did, so your statement is inaccurate", etc., etc.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
how unfortunate by 606 (4.00 / 1) #28 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 12:12:13 PM EST
Our Wiki logo is the default little dude with big feet. We didn't bother to change it. Because it's internal and thus we don't give a shit. Also, we didn't create logins because it's internal. Or deal with colour schemes. Or authorization. So basically it's just management that's made your life hell. Teh suck.

Hey, just pretend I'm still on topic: you know what's a good mix album? Solid Steel Presents The Herbalizer. I'm listening to it now. Damn good.

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imagine dancing banana here

[ Parent ]
It is a very small world by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #30 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 12:37:43 PM EST

I kinda sorta know the Herbalizer. Kinda sorta. In that "we used to swap software and samples in a community of 20-some people, in flagrant violation of copyright law" way. I have a big-assed sample archive I still dig into, then sometimes I will hear something he/they have done, and think, "oh snap, I have that sample... hey wait, i have all these samples!"


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
holy sweet by 606 (4.00 / 1) #32 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 12:54:26 PM EST
You just got, like, a hundred Indie Creds for that. Like you need any more...

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imagine dancing banana here
[ Parent ]
It's your job damnit by debacle (4.00 / 1) #26 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 11:32:22 AM EST
I mean for chrissakes, working from home? You are a fucking plague on the very work ethic of every HuSi'ite within AUs*!

*: Astronomical Units


IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
Oh, I did it. It's done. by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #27 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 11:40:35 AM EST

But it was stupid.

My job, these days, is to collect my paycheck. Nothing more. Anything I do on top of that is a gift, out of the kindness of my heart. Like today? Today I'm in the office for a second time this week. Merry Christmas, Employers! Tomorrow, though? Tomorrow, I'm going to be on the couch all day, playing Battlefield 2.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
hmm by infinitera (4.00 / 1) #33 Tue Nov 08, 2005 at 09:35:22 PM EST
Somehow, I got volunteered to construct a wiki and blog server for work

Separate or unified?

[…] a professional layabout. Which I aspire to be, but am not yet. — CheeseburgerBrown

Damn. by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #35 Wed Nov 09, 2005 at 03:50:47 AM EST

Unfortunately, the specific software (TikiWiki) was selected for me, as SnipSnap looks a fuck of a lot cooler, and easier.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Brained by Falling Masonry | 35 comments (35 topical, 0 hidden)