Print Story Live is good. Whodathunkit?
By ana (Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 07:47:15 AM EST) (all tags)
Wow, an actual diary type thingie.

So, what's up with ana lately?

Well, everything's changed, pretty much. Which is about the best outcome I could have hoped for of all this midlife angst I've been experiencing the past few years.

As many of you will know, I'm a self-taught writer of fiction. I've written a good number of short stories, three of which have been picked up by an online journal with actual editors and stuff (, and hence the proud owner of a coffee mug and two (count 'em two) Amazon gift certificates (long since redeemed, with some extra cash of my own). And a novel and a half. The November Novel (an entry in NaNoWriMo) was posted on as I wrote it. The Saga has had many scenes posted in my k5 diary as I wrote them, but the whole thing, as it exists in its unfinished site, is available only from me, and by request, upon securing a promise to read & critique it.

So last summer, I started writing a diary on another site, in the character of Renée, a character in some of my stories and my saga. Her grad-school experience needed more backstory kinds of exploration, so I started writing a blog-like thing in the character of a 25-year old female physics grad student. With as many issues, even at that age, as the Readers' Digest.

So after a month or two (nearly two) of writing an entry almost every day of mostly mundane stuff with the occasional Nugget of Truth, someone else who also had a diary on that site returned from a summer fling to writing angst-filled diaries about gender identity, why one can't get a job with a master's degree in English in a small southern city, and just generally Life, the Universe, and Everything.

On Sept 22, 2003, she wrote:

I've been reading Ravyn's diary here, and well (swoon), I think I'm in love (wicked grin).
It was funny at the time. Now, not so much. Well, still funny in all the same ways, only also serious and fun and... but i run out of adjectives somewhere along about here.

Many many e-mails later, then adding progressively irc, the telephone, physical objects in the mail, and, wow. We really are in love. I visited her in December for a week, which was long enough to get well over the nerves and to sort out which of her cats wants his tummy skritched and which one (same black & white body model, same feet-in-the-air posture) scratches back.

She's just gone back to her place and her critters after a week's visit here. It's so wonderful to see each other in the context of our ordinary lives. And to see whether, and how, we'd fit together, if.

And we do. Remarkably well. Astonishingly well. Perhaps because of the way we got acquainted in the first place: talking about the hardest parts of our lives, in a venue (online blogs and email) where it's easier to talk about personal peculiarities & gender issues. So, unlike all my previous relationships, from the very start I wasn't hiding anything, but being myself. Carefully and completely myself, obscuring nothing. So there's really no anxiety about the other person finding out something that'll make them go away.

Anyway, she'll be back, in a month. And some of you-all can meet her then, if you should happen to be in Boston. And I'll be visiting there, a time or two or three this spring as well. And then...

But that's the material for a future diary.

< Drive-by MLP: | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
Live is good. Whodathunkit? | 15 comments (15 topical, 0 hidden)
Wait -- she's a woman? by greyrat (6.00 / 2) #1 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 07:58:48 AM EST
You know I'm kidding.

You is a lucky fella.

Well... by ana (5.00 / 4) #2 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:10:55 AM EST
It's complicated. Or maybe it's blindingly simple. Hard to tell, sometimes. Meanwhile, I'm resisting the urge to type
No, actually, she's a guy.

Time is too strange now for a real plot. --clock

[ Parent ]
The important thing is that you're both humans by MohammedNiyalSayeed (6.00 / 2) #4 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:18:03 AM EST

Congratulations on TEH LOVE! Sounds like you're both quite lucky you found each other, which strikes the lately-quite-familiar chord in my mind.

You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Why is being human important? by greyrat (6.00 / 2) #6 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:21:03 AM EST
Except for some simple legal complications...

[ Parent ]
You have unveiled me for the bigoted... by MohammedNiyalSayeed (6.00 / 1) #9 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:37:12 AM EST

..speciesist I truly am... Damnit, and I thought my secret was safely maintained! MUST STOP DRINKING COFFEE IN THE AFTERNOONS...

You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! by greyrat (3.00 / 0) #5 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:19:15 AM EST
They're coming to take me away HAHA!
They're coming to take me away HAHA! HOHO! HEHE!
To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time.
And basket weavers sit and smile and wiggle their thumbs and toes.
They're coming to take me awAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!

Just don't explain it anymore. Post a picture.

[ Parent ]
continuing cheers by Kellnerin (6.00 / 5) #3 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:14:11 AM EST
Just a quick "I'm alive and still happy for you" note ... it's amazing when things work out ;)

Other people's brains. Sometimes I just don't get how they work. That's all. --iGrrrl
Me seventeen. by eann (6.00 / 1) #11 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 09:24:56 AM EST

Or whatever number I get for waiting so long to congratulate you on things going well for you lately.

I'm not trolling here...just trying to earn my badge in the PC Police Force. —tps12
$email =~ s/0/o/;

[ Parent ]
BTW: Note your diary title by greyrat (3.00 / 0) #7 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:25:14 AM EST
I'd imagine there'll be some necrophilia jokes coming soon. If they're not here already.

partial typo by ana (6.00 / 1) #8 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 08:28:52 AM EST
I meant "Life is good," dammit. But I kind of like it the way it is... seeing each other, live and in person, is sooooo gooood.

Time is too strange now for a real plot. --clock

[ Parent ]
Yay and Yay and by blixco (6.00 / 1) #10 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 09:24:34 AM EST

You got my karma!

Sure, I can't walk I'm in so much pain, and the doctors still dunno whats up with me, but it was worth it!

I look forward to meeting you and your significant at the Bostin HuSiThingY in March.
just ignore the smoke, and smile.

WooHoo! by hulver (6.00 / 1) #12 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 09:30:37 AM EST
I'm glad you're happy.

Heh, and if us lot think it's complicated reading it. I can't imagine how confusing it must be living it.

Cheese is not a hat. - clock

You're telling me. by ana (3.00 / 0) #13 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 09:40:36 AM EST
Creative ambiguity can be soooo sexy. :-)

Time is too strange now for a real plot. --clock

[ Parent ]
Dude. by johnny (6.00 / 1) #14 Fri Feb 20, 2004 at 11:27:52 AM EST

She has effectively checked out. She's an un-person of her own making. So it falls to me.--ad hoc (in the hole)
I got to meet her! by iGrrrl (6.00 / 1) #15 Sat Feb 21, 2004 at 04:48:43 AM EST
"I honestly pity the stupid motherfucker who tries to talk down to iGrrrl" - mrgoat
Live is good. Whodathunkit? | 15 comments (15 topical, 0 hidden)