Print Story A rare update
Diary
By MillMan (Tue Jan 08, 2019 at 01:27:35 AM EST) (all tags)
See within


I've probably done a few hole entries, but according to my post history I haven't done a diary in three years.

I've been working 50/50 between Minneapolis and the bay area since mid-2017. I like both places; expense wise I probably still come out ahead a little bit when comparing the lower salaries in Minneapolis versus what I spend in flights and Bay Area rent. Eventually I'll get a job in Minneapolis, depending on the economy of course. Working remotely is a godsend; the normal office exhaustion isn't present, so I can actually do stuff after work, and frankly the occasional slow days mean I can, uh, get other stuff done, like remodeling my house, instead of playing make-work at my desk. It's also good for getting the harder work problems solved since there isn't an entire business unit worth of people around to bug me.

Bought a house in Minneapolis last fall. It's a great place, kind of a shame I bought it at what is probably the top of the market but as long as I can pay the mortgage I don't care about it being underwater. The plan is to pay it off in 10 years or less anyway.

Going to fade facebook over the next few months, probably the full deletion, or as much as possible. I'll keep some sort of messenger account and I'll still use instagram.

I'm finally doing some intentional self-work of the sort I've been quite literally consciously avoiding since I was 30 - typical male issues of emotional numbness as coping, and low social and dating confidence as well.

I have a couple of ideas why my mind is finally going for it. One, with buying the house I am locked in to corporate work for quite a while - no buying freedom in the form of 6-12 month trips or a fun career change to massage like I did for a few years again anytime soon. At this point I have enough wisdom to know life is short and I can't just punt my emotional health for years on end, particularly with the standard modern life grind.

Two, I did a whole bunch of edibles last year to assist with the mandala project, which most of you probably saw on fb (I discovered that getting high while doing art is FUCKING AMAZING 25 years after everyone else my age). While that drug is a very dangerous way to avoid self-work, the psychoactive side really cracked me open emotionally on a number of occasions and things have just changed internally. Or so it seems...we will find out.

My sister is pregnant and due in mid-March. I am pretty excited to be an uncle, I am definitely not having kids myself, and I'm really never around them. Excited to help raise him or her.

That's about it. Publicly for the next year it's back to home remodeling pics, whatever low carb food I'm cooking, Soren the Airedale Terrier, and hopefully niece/nephew photos.

< 228 | I guess... >
A rare update | 5 comments (5 topical, 0 hidden)
Huh. Hey! by clock (2.00 / 0) #1 Tue Jan 08, 2019 at 08:05:05 AM EST
So wow. Great to hear from you! I've been off of the other social media for a long time.

I miss Minneapolis. It's a great city. If it didn't have real weather in the winter, I think Stacky would love it.

Glad to hear you're doing the work. Good for you!


I agree with clock entirely --Kellnerin

The Facebooks by ucblockhead (4.00 / 1) #2 Tue Jan 08, 2019 at 10:36:02 PM EST
I deleted my account Jan 1.  In theory, I can resurrect up until Jan 30, but I can tell you that I haven't had a single moment where I considered it.  It was just feeding lots of mindless reading and negative feelings.

I also did a fade out first.  Stopped posting in October, browsing at all in November.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman

nuked mine a few days ago now by MillMan (2.00 / 0) #5 Sat Jan 12, 2019 at 03:49:22 PM EST
I'm having a small amount of withdrawal but I haven't been tempted to log in. Life feels a bit lighter already.

"Just as there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no libertarians in financial crises." -Krugman

[ Parent ]
good to hear by LoppEar (2.00 / 0) #3 Sat Jan 12, 2019 at 07:23:57 AM EST
I've enjoyed your return to Instagram and love the mandala and housework. Decided for now that I have to fade IG too for home sanity if FB is out and FB is definitely out.

Really glad to hear that an opening for mental-self-work is happening for you!


thanks by MillMan (2.00 / 0) #4 Sat Jan 12, 2019 at 03:46:48 PM EST
I'm glad insta is still a net positive for me. The broader reality of social media is such a bummer.

The mandala should finally get its frame and mounting in late March or early April. There is a bit of work left on the bedrooms, and the living room has a few weeks of work lined up before it'll be ready for artwork on the walls.

"Just as there are no atheists in foxholes, there are no libertarians in financial crises." -Krugman

[ Parent ]
A rare update | 5 comments (5 topical, 0 hidden)