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Food
By CheeseburgerBrown (Wed Mar 13, 2013 at 04:15:10 PM EST) (all tags)
A homeless man demanded my hot dog and yelled at me when I didn't make with the compliance. None of it disturbed me much which is how I can tell I'm used to being in the city again. I just designed a new trajectory that included wide berth for the shouting guy and sallied on. Social justice hardly even crossed my mind. Habituation is only slow when you're waiting for it.


The hot dog vendor seemed inordinately pleased to be serving me, as if I were in an American family dining restaurant or something. But I was not invited to draw on anything or to remember my server's name. Is this just how demanding of enthusiastic customer service city people are now, or is there some lingering bit of country friendliness I'm not succeeding in shaking off? I can't tell. But either way the hot dog lady joins a list of service-oriented people in the city who seem surprised and delighted to interact with me. (Which is weird, because I'm not very friendly really.)

I guess it made the homeless guy jealous. Maybe he has a secret crush on the hot dog lady. Maybe he orients his cardboard square just so he can watch her all day out of the corner of his eye, dreaming of what never were and what might've been and what her bum feels like.

I'd say he lunged at me but his lunging days were behind him. I think he lurched. I think I may have been lurched at. "Why don't you give me that?" he said with some zeal. He had those little foamy white flecks on his lips. "Why don't you hand it over?"

Like I said, I didn't have a witty riposte. I just weaved around him, as if he were a minor baddie in a video game. If hadn't been holding a hot dog I could've bounced on his head and taken a 1UP.

That was one good hot dog. All mustard and onions. Fuck yeah.

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You can't win. by ObviousTroll (4.00 / 1) #1 Wed Mar 13, 2013 at 06:38:48 PM EST
I once got yelled at by a homeless guy for trying to give him my breakfast. 

An Angry and Flatulent Pig, Trying to Tie Balloon Animals
Was It From Denny's? by CheeseburgerBrown (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Mar 13, 2013 at 07:44:31 PM EST
Honestly I get cranky when people try to foist food on me too, but usually only after an obnoxious level of persistence has been crossed. If I were homeless I could imagine putting up with more shit, because I'd be more laid back about certain matters, I think.

On the other hand, I find breakfast one of the easiest meals of the day to eat, even if it's with strangers, so I personally can't now imagine refusing a perfectly reasonable hot breakfast for free or even slightly not free.

But I'm a notorious breakfast slut. Just ask my wife.
Science-fiction wallah, storytelling gorilla, man wearing a hat: Cheeseburger Brown.

[ Parent ]
It was more by ObviousTroll (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Mar 13, 2013 at 08:00:45 PM EST
"Just because my feet are exposed, infected and frozen don't mean I need help from *you*!"

And, actually, the guy running the food truck tried to warn me; he knew what I was up to when I bought 2 breakfasts... 

An Angry and Flatulent Pig, Trying to Tie Balloon Animals
[ Parent ]
Must vote Republican <n/t> by jimgon (4.00 / 1) #4 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 05:35:07 AM EST





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Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
[ Parent ]
At Taste of Chicago by barooo (4.00 / 2) #6 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 11:15:40 AM EST
a few years ago, a very aggressive homeless dude came up to me, and basically tried to help himself to some of what I was eating, which I remember as fried okra.  When I wouldn't let him he got all surly and said, fairly loudly, "What, you don't like n*ggers?". 

man, i need a beefy taco now.
-gzt
[ Parent ]
Homeless people are the secret ingredient by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #5 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 07:02:39 AM EST
In Soylent Mauve.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

toss him a toonie tomorrow by misslake (4.00 / 1) #7 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 03:14:15 PM EST
empower him to buy his own hot dog.

Sadly by CheeseburgerBrown (2.00 / 0) #8 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 08:39:09 PM EST
Sadly, I was in the financial district, so the hot dog cost three dollars. So I don't think I'll get a hot dog there again. But if I do find myself forced into that position, I will definitely be on the lookout for the surly hot dog wanting guy. I'd know him in a heartbeat: he had a big yellow unkempt beard!

Do you think he'd make change for a five?


Science-fiction wallah, storytelling gorilla, man wearing a hat: Cheeseburger Brown.
[ Parent ]
big yellow unkempt beard by jimgon (4.00 / 3) #10 Fri Mar 15, 2013 at 05:11:16 AM EST
You sure he was homeless and not an IT worker?




---------------
Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
[ Parent ]
I still want that hot dog! by MrMole (4.00 / 3) #9 Thu Mar 14, 2013 at 10:57:32 PM EST
Give it now!

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