But I do have bad habits, and perhaps this is a good time to interrupt some of them, just to see what life would be like, without them.
So the other night (I believe it might have been Ash Wednesday, even), I found myself telling Herring and notafurry on IRC that I was giving up gloom for Lent. I've gotten into the habit of expecting to feel awful, and sometimes it's a self-fulfilling expectation.
Some years ago, I bought a hat. It has a wide brim, and it's slightly too large around the circumference. The hat vendor tucked some bits of felt into the hat band, which helps, but as time goes by the felt compresses and the hat band stretches a bit.
It turns out if I smile, my forehead wrinkles, which increases the circumference of my head. So I learned to smile on windy days, to counteract the aerodynamical lift of the wind on the hat brim.
And whaddya know... smiling and pretending to be happy actually made me feel better for realz. Whodathunk.
And yeah, I know that it's important to feel what I'm feeling, not to deny it or push it under the rug someplace. So I'm sure there'll be sad moments. But they can come and go, without leaving behind a nostalgia for the way things used to hurt.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.
So far, at least.
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