Print Story I'm too emo for my clothes
Diary
By spiralx (Fri Mar 04, 2011 at 10:35:41 PM EST) epic, moo (all tags)

Time check - 9:04pm.  So far I'm unable to decide on a title for this diary, I think the awesome French ghettotech mix I'm listening to is distracting me. Time check - 10:10pm. OK, right, that's finished, now I'm being distracted by my house-mate who I've not seen in a week. Time check - 11:12pm. Well, that was a really positive conversation which has left me feeling pretty damn optimistic, which is a trait I'm often in dire need of.

It's now been over two hours since I started typing in this box, and I'll finish the intro in a second, just as soon as I finish reorganising my drawer of print-outs. Because I started doing that around 8-ish, and my floor is covered in folders.

Time check - 11:59pm. My floor is clear, my drawer is (more) organised, an on with the body...



About a year ago to this day I was diagnosed as having ADHD. This, along with the process of discovery, reflection, denial, acceptance and finally diagnosis that took place in the two years preceding it, was a fairly big thing. It all started from a coincidence of two things - firstly, hitting 31 and realising that my modus operandi of amphetamine use, hasty decision making and inability to do anything long-term was not compatible with my desire to have a family, kids, and all that grown up stuff. Secondly, I met someone through our group of friends who had ADHD; I'd first heard of it when I was about 20 and never really thought anything of it - it was something kids got right? But meeting this guy and talking to him opened my eyes to the possibility, and the more I read about adult ADHD the more it seemed as though I was reading about myself.

There's only two places in the UK with specialist services for adult ADHD in the NHS. One is in Swansea in Wales, the other, luckily, is at the Muadsley Hospital in Denmark Hill, south London... just under an hour's journey from my house. Once I'd got my doctor to refer me to them, I then went through the initial assessment, a battery of tests and having to deal with my mother's inability to recall my childhood in any specific way (diagnosis requires evidence of issues from age 7 onwards you see) I finally got the diagnosis. And fuck me was that ever a relief.

With the diagnosis comes treatment, which is exactly what you'd think - Ritalin. OK, methylphenidrate really, but that's how I think of it in my head. Which just goes to show the power of branding eh? Since starting taking the ritalin I've only had speed three times... which is quite a change from before, when I was taking it pretty much every Monday to Friday. Hell, I even had a six month period where I literally stayed awake from Monday morning through to Friday night beyond every single week... I once worked out I gained about 40 days worth of extra time by not sleeping during the week, and this was at the point where I was in a new job, needing to learn stuff fast and having actual deadlines looming. I spent this time getting back into programming in a way I hadn't since I was a 15-year old kid with nothing better to do :)

The new job (well, new in the context of this diary, I've worked there 4 years now lol) was at the British Medical Journal, and it's been great. Not only is it great to work for someone doing something you believe in (evidence-based medicine), but the job is the right level of challenging and fun, the people are nice and the company itself is very relaxed and good to their staff, we didn't quite get into The Times's Top 100 companies to work for this year but close. And they've been great with the ADHD thing as well, although it's kind of weird to have test data on the subject of the brain disorder you have ;)

So the ritalin has been good, and it's helped smooth my life out in any number of ways, but I really need to do break out of the habits I formed in my 20s, and that's not proving easy to do. Amd while I've always been a bit anxious nowadays it's hitting me more often, because now that I can now remember things and reflect on them, I can see how I'm constantly falling into the same old patterns rather than taking part in my life.

I've lucked out though, as I've just started aiding the cause of science by participating in a study into whether cognitive behavioral therapy is effective in managing the symptoms of ADHD, and I'm not in the control group. So I've begun an 18 week course of CBT with focus on the issues arising from ADHD - inattentiveness and impuslivity being if not at the root, then certainly exacerbating things in my life. In my first session I was given a print-out with some information on ADHD which included a vignette of a fictional character with ADHD whose adult life story mirrored mine in a way that's still eerie. But CBT works, and I can't see that this won't be incredibly beneficial to me... and without the hassle of trying to wangle the cost of CBT through my GP.

Despite how it might seem from the preceeding paragraphs, the last few years have been good :) Let's see, I split up with Johanna after three years but we're best friends still, she's been< massively supportive through the whole ADHD thing and I couldn't have done it without her. After spending five years feeling guilty over Torie and what happened I bumped into her in the park near work about a month after getting my diagnosis, and I got to say the sorry I hadn't ever properly said to her when we met for lunch, and I've learnt and moved on from that.

I'm still out quite a lot... but it's definitely about quality over quantity nowadays lol, I can't do the ridiculous benders I used to do in my early 20s. But even as I'm taking less and less in the way of recreational chemicals, I'm loving going out and dancing all night more and more. And oddly, finding it easier... although I guess, practice makes perfect applies to raving as much as anything else! It probably helps that after many years of trying a breakthrough combination of Derrick May and Modeselektor managed to convinve more and more of my friends to come out to nights with decent music lol.

In fact this year I've already got lots planned! Going to the Bangface Weekender at the start of May for a weekend of chalets, ridiculously filthy music and sitting on one of the UK's finest beaches, and then in August we're going to Hungary to the Ozora Festival for a whole week of stomping in a valley to psy trance with the nicest bunch of people from all across Europe you've ever met, followed by several days by the pool in a hotel in Budapest. And before all that I'm off on holiday to Egypt in a week and a half, which I'm really looking forward to :)

Time check - 3:27am. This used to be quicker lol, but then again I wasn't trying to compress five years of stuff into a single diary :) I really do intend to be a bit more regular around here, so hopefully my next diary won't be so much effort lol.

PS I'm going to tombuck's wedding... who'd've thought!

PPS I'm sure I had more diaries here... hulver, did you lose some data? And there's no "Your Diary" link either, grumble, grumble...

< Jog On, Kitties! | Better I start using a template for my diaries. >
I'm too emo for my clothes | 70 comments (70 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
good stuff n/t by dmg (2.00 / 0) #1 Fri Mar 04, 2011 at 10:39:01 PM EST

--
dmg - HuSi's most dimwitted overprivileged user.
You are such a lurker! by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #5 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 12:25:10 AM EST
 *poke*

[ Parent ]
ADHD? by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #2 Fri Mar 04, 2011 at 11:17:42 PM EST
I believe it, Mrs. Ha has been diagnosed, she's quite scattered when she doesn't have her Concerta.

I can't do the ridiculous benders I used to do in my early 20s.

Yeah, when your body gets older, it's hard.

Good to hear from you, have fun at tombuck's wedding.


Concerta by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #4 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 12:14:43 AM EST
I started off with Concerta but found it wore off too quickly, I'm currently on Equasym which I take twice daily - one on waking and one at lunchtime. It works much better for office hours, and I'm actually taking less overall. Out of curiousity how much does it cost over there? I pay a £7.20 prescription fee and get three months worth.

[ Parent ]
About $350 a month until our deductible by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #19 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:26:13 AM EST
kicks in, then it's about $70 a month, though the insurance company wants her on something cheaper like Ritalin.

But the US does have the best health care in the world.


[ Parent ]
Seriously? by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #25 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 11:34:15 AM EST
Concerta costs £42.45 for 30 days @ 36mg, so it shouldn't be more than £130/month even for quite a high dose. Do US prices include a cost for making the prescription as well as the drug cost, or are Janssen-Cilag just ripping Americans off?

[ Parent ]
I think US prices are higher since most people by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #26 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 11:46:10 AM EST
filling prescriptions have health insurance which cuts the price.

US prescription prices are supposed to be unreal, since very few people pay "full price", most pay far less due to health insurance. Ours changed in the last few years so that we don't get a co-pay (20% of the "full price") until we meet our $2400 family deductible.

For my wife, her ADHD, antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds go from $1300 a month to $250 a month.

But we have the best health care system in the world, the rest of the world must have it really bad.


[ Parent ]
Very good point. by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #27 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 12:05:06 PM EST
Thank goodness we all have something to aspire to out in the rest of the world. Fear not, we are also intent on copying your capitalist practices, so we too may be as fortunate as you.

[ Parent ]
Ouch by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #34 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:48:23 PM EST
 You don't get to take advantage of bulk purchasing of drugs like the NHS does either which contributes... and in fact is excluded by the new health care bill in another sop to the insurance companies it seems.

So $70 a month, times 3 is £129, so that's just over 18 times what I pay more my prescription... ouch. But at least you're free from socialism, at least until Obama converts the country into a Muslim Marxist utopia...


[ Parent ]
the government buying drugs in bulk? by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #37 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:52:27 PM EST
Only if there intending to sell them on the street to finance secret activities.

I"m planning on spending $5000 out of pocket this year, of which $4000 might be drugs, but the best health care system in the world isn't cheap.


[ Parent ]
You're insurance sucks by jimgon (2.00 / 0) #49 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 06:48:09 PM EST
and by extension likely your employer does too. 

Seriously. 





---------------
Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
[ Parent ]
Hey, our CEO just bought an $8 million by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #51 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 08:59:51 PM EST
five bedroom penthouse in Manhattan, just weeks after the corp laid off a few hundred. How can that suck?


[ Parent ]
came here to say that. by dev trash (2.00 / 0) #54 Sun Mar 06, 2011 at 04:46:32 PM EST
How is it that a much larger business has worse insurance than the small business I work for?

--
I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR BALLS! ->clock
[ Parent ]
Beer and hookers by jimgon (2.00 / 0) #55 Sun Mar 06, 2011 at 04:50:05 PM EST
don't pay for themselves.  The execs need a slush fund for that.




---------------
Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
[ Parent ]
older worker population? by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #56 Sun Mar 06, 2011 at 06:50:23 PM EST
having to have insurance plans in all 50 states?

I did pick the high deductible plan, even with $5000 of medical expenses planned, it was cheaper than the blended plan.


[ Parent ]
Hey hey my friend by kwsNI (2.00 / 0) #3 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 12:02:04 AM EST
Good to see you on, even if you did have to condense 5 years into a couple dozen paragraphs. 

. by spiralx (4.00 / 2) #6 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 12:32:13 AM EST
But now I've gotten that out of the way, I can now post a diary to say how mundane my weekend was in excruciating detail :D

[ Parent ]
Excellent by kwsNI (2.00 / 0) #7 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:35:43 AM EST
Would be quite welcome to see something weekly from you.  And I doubt even with your new, slower lifestyle that many of your weeks are mundane. 

Then again, right now, I'd kill for a mundane week. 

[ Parent ]
What happened to littlepest? -nt by chuckles (2.00 / 0) #8 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:39:17 AM EST


"The one absolutely certain way of bringing this nation to ruin [...] would be to permit it to become a tangle of squabbling nationalities"
=8^0 by ammoniacal (4.00 / 2) #9 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 02:57:43 AM EST

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

[ Parent ]
AFAIK she's good by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #13 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 09:55:29 AM EST
I've not seen her in about six months or so, but she's good as far as I know... we not really close any more though after having a huge row some years back.

[ Parent ]
Update by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #59 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 09:57:23 AM EST
I saw her this weekend actually and had a nice chat; she's doing ok  :)

[ Parent ]
Missing diaries by gazbo (2.00 / 0) #10 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 03:51:28 AM EST
Click the "Search archive" box.

I recommend always assuming 7th normal form where items in a text column are not allowed to rhyme.

Also... by ana (2.00 / 0) #12 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 07:37:25 AM EST
the "your stories" button is the one you want to find your diary.

"And this ... is a piece of Synergy." --Kellnerin

[ Parent ]
Ta muchly :) by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #14 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 09:56:10 AM EST
And hi to you both! 

[ Parent ]
Whoa by TheophileEscargot (2.00 / 0) #11 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 04:41:08 AM EST
A lot to take in... good to see you're still around!

Dunno if you do Twitter but quite a few of the old Husites are there, hulver has a list.
--
It is unlikely that the good of a snail should reside in its shell: so is it likely that the good of a man should?

Good to see you too :) by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #15 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:00:08 AM EST
I am on twitter (as spir4lx I think), but I don't ever check or update it... I've been pretty much entirely passive online for quite a few years, stopping posting on pretty much all of the forums I used to and not even reading most, it's one of the reasons I've not posted here in a while. In fact the only forum I still read every day is /. of all things.

My next task is to do some catching up of other people's diaries here...


[ Parent ]
online passive by Merekat (2.00 / 0) #18 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:24:38 AM EST
Yet you show up on my facebook suggested friends. I guess you know someone who knows someone who knows my brother-in-law.

Good to know you're alive and doing well (and doing Science!).

[ Parent ]
Y HELO THAR! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #29 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:35:43 PM EST
Ok, I do spend a lot of time on Facebook and have about 1,500 friends after playing far too many FB games, which I assume is how we're connected... although I think I'm friends with hulver and georgeha, so maybe it's that?

How're you doing? :) 

[ Parent ]
Right, more festival pics please by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #36 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:51:02 PM EST
of scantily clad women.


[ Parent ]
Doing well by Merekat (2.00 / 0) #52 Sun Mar 06, 2011 at 05:00:32 AM EST
Moved to Switzerland, landed a once-in-a-lifetime rollercoaster project, learned to cycle.

I've no Husi people on FB, twitter only. Still largely segmenting my existences.

[ Parent ]
.\ eh? by Breaker (2.00 / 0) #41 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 03:47:34 PM EST
As a top consultant for a leading Fortune 500 corporation...

Does Jon Erikson still exist?

But eh, nice hearing from you.


[ Parent ]
And you :) by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #44 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 04:27:20 PM EST
How's things?

Jon Erikson has a Facebook page, a gmail account and is a member of an array of forums and sites of a slightly less than salubrious nature lol.

[ Parent ]
Me, I'm good thanks! by Breaker (2.00 / 0) #46 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 05:42:51 PM EST
Married, 2 kids and a shed.  A SHED OF POWAH!


[ Parent ]
Twitter by jimgon (2.00 / 0) #16 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:20:36 AM EST
You just got me to create a Twitter account.  jimgon was unavailable so I had to had the rest of the letters. 




---------------
Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
[ Parent ]
Oh, fine fine ... by yankeehack (2.00 / 0) #23 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:49:23 AM EST

"...she dares to indulge in the secret sport. You can't be a MILF with the F, at least in part because the M is predicated upon it."-CBB
[ Parent ]
God. Not twitter by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #39 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 02:51:43 PM EST
Already can't keep up with this place and facebook.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

[ Parent ]
no pressure. by garlic (4.00 / 1) #69 Thu Mar 10, 2011 at 10:20:40 AM EST
it's best not to worry about what you missed on twitter, even if you're on twitter. Although it's good for MLPs.


[ Parent ]
ADHD by jimgon (2.00 / 0) #17 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:24:32 AM EST
Glad to see you are finding benefit in the meds.  Have you noticed a marked increase in your ability to actually get things done and focus on things?  My daughter has been on meds for a few years and we see improvement.s.  I'm interested in the effects in an adult because I've avoided going on meds myself for a while.  Like other things I've been waiting for an adult I know to start taking them so that I have a case study.  Noticing any negative effects? 




---------------
Technician - "We can't even get decent physical health care. Mental health is like witchcraft here."
To an extent by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #28 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:30:41 PM EST
It's a little more difficult to tell in my case, as I was basically using speed five days as week before starting the meds for much the same reason. But it's definitely an improvement over baseline, and even over the speed, even though methylphenidate is less potent as an amphetamine, it makes it easier to focus on one thing rather than just focussed and distractable, which is good. The other important benefit is a general improvement in my episodic memory, which was pretty bad. It's nice to be able to think of something before going to bed, and being able to remember it in the morning...

Negative effects are again hard to judge compared to taking speed all the time, but once I'd got the dosage correct it's all a nicely predictable thing - I take Equasym XL which are slow release over about 4-5 hours, 40mg about 8am when I get up and another 40mg about 12-1pm, which lasts through my working day. I can definitely tell when I'm on it as there's a mild amphetamine type feeling but no side effects I've really noticed; and it's worn off by the time I get home and I don't usually take it then or at weekends unless I need to get stuff done or I'm going out :)

If you want to know more you can email me at spiralx at gmail.com...


[ Parent ]
-1 no poi by StackyMcRacky (2.00 / 0) #20 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:32:39 AM EST
Just to show how lame we are now, clock is cooking breakfast and I just shouted "HEY! spiralx wrote a diary!"

i'd have done the same by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #21 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:42:47 AM EST
if my hubby was awake to yell to...
---------
if de-virgination results in me being able to birth hammerhead sharks, SIGN ME UP!!! --misslake
[ Parent ]
Sorry, sorry! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #30 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:41:17 PM EST
I've been doing more poi the last year or so after not doing any at all for a couple of years - it helps that I work over the road from this park, so in the summer I get to practise at lunchtimes. I have a pair of quite distinctive orange flag poi which gets some looks on occasion... and being filmed by Japanese girls once or twice lol.

How's things with you? :)


[ Parent ]
fat. miserable. angry. by StackyMcRacky (2.00 / 0) #42 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 04:04:23 PM EST
check again in a month.

[ Parent ]
Boo! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #43 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 04:24:23 PM EST
 *hugs*

[ Parent ]
welcome back by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #22 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 10:43:58 AM EST
you'll have a lot of scorecard updating to do- a lot has changed in the past few years.
---------
if de-virgination results in me being able to birth hammerhead sharks, SIGN ME UP!!! --misslake
Hi! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #32 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:42:09 PM EST
It seems so... and what's with "The Whine Cellar" anyway? How've you been? 

[ Parent ]
whine cellar is like the hole by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #38 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 02:13:15 PM EST
but archived. So they're sorta hidden but not deleted.

I've been well. If we're going with a quick summary of the last 5 years, I've graduated from college, gotten married (to nstenz, who lurks but doesn't post much), gotten a permanent job, bought a house, and our most recent event was having a baby (10 months ago).
---------
if de-virgination results in me being able to birth hammerhead sharks, SIGN ME UP!!! --misslake

[ Parent ]
hey! by clock (2.00 / 0) #24 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 11:13:35 AM EST
glad to hear it's all on the up and up!  it's always good to see a familiar...um...face?


I agree with clock entirely --Kellnerin

And you! by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #33 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:43:04 PM EST
It's good to see so many familiar faces here :) 

[ Parent ]
I need some mental floss now by lm (2.00 / 0) #31 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:42:06 PM EST
I have a mental image of you strutting down the street singing in a thickly contrived accent, "I'm too emo for my clothes ..." while slowly stripping to a dnace hall beat and a whiny guitar.

There is no more degenerate kind of state than that in which the richest are supposed to be the best.
Cicero, The Republic
Hee hee by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #35 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 01:49:32 PM EST
I'm glad to have been of service :) 

[ Parent ]
I was diagnosed ADHD back in 1970 by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #40 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 02:53:48 PM EST
Before it was trendy. Spent about 6 years on dexies. By the time I was 13 I had built the habits I needed to function without them. The inattentiveness and impuslivity are still there, but manageable.

Welcome back. Don't be a stranger. ;-)

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

That's cool by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #45 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 04:55:28 PM EST
It's hard to say how different my life would've been had I been caught at that age, but it wasn't something that was common knowledge over here when I was that age, as I said I first heard of it when I was at uni, and then as a developmental disorder and often spoken of disparagingly. Although apparently it was first defined in the 1840's! Glad you found ways to deal with it, for me it's those habits that are hampering me now and I'm hoping the CBT will help with :)

[ Parent ]
Oi oi! by Dr Thrustgood (2.00 / 0) #47 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 06:03:27 PM EST
Great to see you back here, although I've also been pretty slack when it comes to posting ;)

BTW, you're also invited to the stag, which I'm expecting my best man to start emailing about in the next couple of days :-) Who'd've thought indeed!



this by LoppEar (2.00 / 0) #48 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 06:48:02 PM EST
is great!


Very good to see you again. by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #50 Sat Mar 05, 2011 at 07:08:45 PM EST
Glad to hear things are going well. Especially as when I last asked Breaker about you he was pretty worried about you.

And well done on getting the adult ADHD diagnosis. I've seen a bit of how much of a big deal ADHD is in life, so hopefully you're much better with the stimulants. There's a few more places than just the Maudsley and Swansea who do it, though. My (NHS) employers run a clinic in Bristol, and they have referrals from quite a few places surrounding, but not that far away. But yeah, it can be quite hard to get a referral.

Thanks :) by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #63 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 10:09:13 AM EST
The first time I saw the GP about it he said he would do the referral, then I didn't hear anything and when I finally went back to the surgery and saw another GP she looked at my record and there wasn't even any record of it; thankfully she did the referral for me that time. After having settled on my current prescription and not seeing the psychologist every month and using the Muadsley pharmacy she was a bit funny when I went in about prescribing the meds for me though, I've changed which GP I see there now and the new one is cool, just need to see him every 3 months for the prescription, and then get a large bag of drugs from the chemist :)

[ Parent ]
Bloody hell it's sprialx by hulver (4.00 / 2) #53 Sun Mar 06, 2011 at 02:18:36 PM EST
wow, blast from the past. I was at herring's house when you posted this, and it was met with surprise from us both.

Glad you're doing ok.

I've left J and I'm living in a new place. Got a new girlfriend (ReboundRabbit) who I talk to about everything, which is why she knows about this place.

So I'm very happy, for a change. It's good to hear from you again.
--
Cheese is not a hat. - clock

*like* by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #60 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 09:58:14 AM EST
 Oh wait, this isn't Facebook.

Glad to hear you're doing well :)


[ Parent ]
That level of amphetamine use by nebbish (4.00 / 1) #57 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 05:47:05 AM EST
Is frightening, good that you've cut down.

I've slowed down a lot recently, particularly with alcohol which is a very good thing.

--------
It's political correctness gone mad!

Indeed by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #61 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 10:04:41 AM EST
But it was the fact that I felt guilty about having lied about it in the past, but not about my actual use of it, that led me to thinking seriously about why it was I used it, and hence to taking the ADHD thing seriously. I was, well, lucky I guess in that my dealer got arrested the week after I started medication (although I feel bad for him!) and so went straight from using it five days a week to not at all without having to deal with temptation, but I really haven't wanted to do it since then. I've even had it a couple of times at the weekend without feeling the need to do it, so it's not just lack of opportunity.

Glad you've slowed down as well, it seems getting older does make you more sensible. Or boring ;)


[ Parent ]
Hello by codemonkey uk (2.00 / 0) #58 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 08:49:37 AM EST
That is all.

--- Thad ---
Almost as Smart As you.
Hello by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #62 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 10:05:00 AM EST
To you too :) 

[ Parent ]
Holy cow by duxup (2.00 / 0) #64 Mon Mar 07, 2011 at 05:26:34 PM EST
I've seen that user name before I think.

____
duxup! by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #65 Tue Mar 08, 2011 at 06:07:22 AM EST
How the devil are you sir? :) 

[ Parent ]
I am by duxup (2.00 / 0) #66 Tue Mar 08, 2011 at 09:24:57 AM EST
Still converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
____
[ Parent ]
(Comment Deleted) by spiralx (2.00 / 0) #67 Tue Mar 08, 2011 at 10:16:46 AM EST

This comment has been deleted by spiralx



[ Parent ]
Wow by spiralx (4.00 / 1) #68 Tue Mar 08, 2011 at 10:17:49 AM EST
You're just like the oil companies, raping our planet!!!!

[ Parent ]
TLDR by Evil Cloaked User (4.00 / 1) #70 Wed Mar 30, 2011 at 08:45:12 PM EST
Got bored. Ooh, shiny...

I'm too emo for my clothes | 70 comments (70 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback