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Diary
By Sapphire (Sat Dec 18, 2010 at 01:32:51 PM EST) (all tags)
It is interesting how people can change and yet remain the same.


It has been quite interesting to be conversing with the ex again.  While it is good to get some of the things out in the open.  Sometimes it is hard to discuss the things that he deems important.  In my case, I've forgotten more than I probably should have.  I do have a terrible memory.  Some of what has been coming out has been painful if not anything else.  Things that other people told him about things that happened out west.  Things that I didn't even remember happening.  Even though he is bringing these things up.  I'm still dealing with a lot of abandonment, anger and well frankly, there is a lot of hatred still there.  He keeps bringing up one person I dated while he and I were apart.  Frankly, I'm so sick and tired of hearing this.  I've told him, it's none of your business because we weren't together.  You have no right to put on me what you feel is an affront to your ego.  He turned around and slept with the "friend" who trolled for men on Craigslist for one night stands and then had the nerve to call the guy who was nothing more than a rebound a low-life scumbag.  (Or whatever.) 

During all of this, he has mentioned reconciling.  I'm sure that isn't a good idea.  It is just too easy to fall back into bad habits.  We would probably slip into the old habits that made our relationship so volatile in the first place.

There are people in my life that I'm sure he would rather I not be friends with.  He knows those relationships will never change.  Frankly, they have never been anything less than great friends. They have been me in my deepest pain and they have and will be there in my best joys.  He has made his decisions regarding them, and I disagree with the ones he has made. 

I guess, I am most relieved that he has rid himself of the "friend."  I know that everyone told him how much of an emotional vacuum, selfish................  I could go on, but I'm going to stop.  He learned the hard way by himself.  (Sometimes people just can't learn from the mistakes of others.)  I find myself doing the same thing from time to time.  Have I learned from my mistakes?  I certainly hope so! 

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DISCLAIMER: by ammoniacal (4.00 / 2) #1 Sat Dec 18, 2010 at 01:43:01 PM EST
Nothing in the preceding story involves me, nor any of my incarnations.

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

Why bother by duxup (4.00 / 1) #2 Sat Dec 18, 2010 at 04:36:23 PM EST
If you have to say stuff like "He keeps bringing up one person I dated while he and I were apart.  Frankly, I'm so sick and tired of hearing this. "  Why bother even speaking to them?  If you haven't spoken to someone in a long time and that stuff comes up there seems to be no benefit to continuing communication.

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