A guy named Friedrich called me out of the blue saying he got my number off the card in the pinball machine at $Bar. He had a pin which needed repairs. We arranged a time and date and I took a train to the outer reaches of the S-Bahn system, where he then picked me up and drove another 10 minutes to his house.
It took a few hours to fix everything and I was just finishing up around 6p.m. His wife asked if I'd like to stay for dinner and Friedrich started telling me just how good his Maria's Schweinebraten was. So I stayed.
There were two girls at the table, one about 7 and the other 10-ish. The younger one was a fussy eater, having once again decided she was a vegetarian a couple of days earlier. She does this once every couple of months, they explained. "The girls play pinball sometimes. It's our 14-year-old son who plays the machine the most," said Maria, "But he's upstairs right now."
"Is he being punished?" I asked.
"No, he's upstairs with his girlfriend."
"Aren't they having dinner?"
They both looked at me the way you look at a child when you tell him for the umpteenth time that yes, that fire is hot. All fire is hot. Always.
"No, they're having sex."
The look on my face told them they were going to have to spell things out for the 40-year-old idiot sitting at their table.
"We know they're having sex," explained Friedrich. "At least they're doing it here where they can be safe and have privacy and use protection. They're not ready to be parents."
"And we're sure as hell not ready to be grandparents," added Maria, laughing. The older girl giggled at the discussion of her brother getting it on while the younger one was so thoroughly disgusted that someone would be having sex in the same house in which she was trying to eat that she stormed off.
And we went back to eating our pork and potatoes. A few after-dinner games of pinball ensured the Kings and Queens machine was well and truly fixed, after which Friedrich drove me back to the train station. An hour and a half later I was home, €150 richer for my efforts, so I went back out in the hopes of finding my own companion for the evening. I ended up just playing pinball at $Bar until closing time.
|< Books I've Read This Year 2010 | Insomnia's a bitch >|