Print Story It occurs to me
By hulver (Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 10:27:54 AM EST) (all tags)
That I've not done one of these for quite some time.

Inside, I will talk about stuff and avoid substance.


Been listening to some more music, since I asked for suggestions. There's some good stuff there.

Since Christmas I've been listening to stuff on my mobile phone. I got a fancy pair of Bluetooth earphones for Christmas and my mobile is the only Bluetooth music device I've got at the moment. My plan to equip my laptop with Bluetooth went wrong.

The first idea was to get a mini Bluetooth dongle, which I did. After eventually finding some bloody audio drivers for Windows which worked I broke the dongle.

I then bought an internal Bluetooth module that fits in my laptop, but that didn't work. I didn't have the heart to rip the laptop apart again to take the thing out, as it's a PITA.

Before you ask, I did a test of sorts to see if it was working before I put the laptop back together again, but it was difficult to use because of the way you have to pull things apart to install the module.

So, I'm going to have to track down another Bluetooth thing for the laptop now.

Anyway, back to the phone. Listening to music on it is pretty good, although the player is a bit limited. Being a Sony, it's got a memory stick instead of a standard memory card. The memory stick bit of my external card reader is broken now, and because it's a memory stick M2 it doesn't fit in my built in laptop one. The only way left I have of getting music onto it is to use the laptop cable.

Which is quite annoying, as I'd gone Bluetooth to get rid of all the bloody cables that were lying around the place.

I've got a wireless mouse (not Bluetooth, logitech nano) which is great.

Now Wireless music.

Reading that back, it occurs to me that's it's quite boring. Welcome to my life!


Work is shit right now. Too much work, I can never get one thing finished because I have too much to do. I'm going to get a handle on that before it kills me.

I had a very busy time leading up to Christmas. Working late nights and often weekends as well. Then I had nothing to do over Christmas, which was bliss. Like a valve being released I gradually relaxed.

Then a couple of days before I was due to go back, I started getting nightmares and waking up in a cold sweat about the amount of work that I've got to do.

So that was nice.

Every time I think about the amount of work that I've got to do, I want to throw up. I get a swelling of bile and a bitter taste at the back of my mouth.


Went to work Tuesday morning. Cleared all the snow off the car, but by the time I'd finished it was covered again. So I just got in and put the wipers on. There was me and one other person in the office.

I fixed the internet connection, which some fuckwit had broken by changing the patch cable (at the request of our ISP who are also a bunch of fuckwits. 45 collisions on an ethernet connection in 5 minutes doesn't seem excessive to me, don't try and blame it for a poorly performing connection). I plugged the net connection back into the correct socket, have you heard of testing your changes?

The snow had got so bad, it took me over an hour to drive the 2.5 miles back home. I had to take some different routes as I couldn't get the car up some hills because of the snow. I also scratched the car by hitting the front gate when the car slid sideways as I was trying to reverse into the driveway. Good job I don't give a shit.


Wasn't the best time of life, I must admit. J can really be a selfish cow and it fucking pissed me off. She still hasn't twigged that she did anything wrong. She uses other things as an excuse for something she wants to do, so that she can get her own way. It's the sort of behaviour I'd expect from our 11 year old, not a grown woman.

I came this close >.< to just walking out about 3 times. She didn't even notice.

As to loot, I got this awesome pair of Bluetooth earphones from her. Which are the exact pair I asked for, so no complaints there.

I got a pink horn for my bike from my Brother, which is great. Rather than the PARP! noise that you'd expect from it, it gives this rather high pitched SQUEEE! noise. Makes everybody jump. I can't wait to fit it to the bike.

From my parents we got a new video camera, that J had asked for as a replacement for our 10 year old video camera. It's fantastic. Fits in the palm of my hand. Takes video. Nothing too fancy, it's great.

I also got "Unseen Academicals" the new Terry Pratchett. I enjoyed it, but it did leave me a bit cold. There was definitely something missing. It seemed to have been written in parts by different people. The various plot lines seemed to be completely separate, and just sort of mashed together at the end. Not a classic discworld by any means. A bit too tidy.

That's it


< merry epiphany | 500 Days of Baby PC Phone >
It occurs to me | 23 comments (23 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Have you considered a plonker account? by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #1 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 10:32:39 AM EST
I have my own substance to deal with, which I only obliquely mention here.

Heh by hulver (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 10:37:54 AM EST
Yeah, I sort of let some substance slip through.
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
work by sasquatchan (4.00 / 2) #3 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:01:07 AM EST
can you stop caring ? I've found that helps immensely!

It would be easier. by hulver (4.00 / 1) #4 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:08:40 AM EST
While there is one person there who gives a shit about the customers, so will I.
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
Not caring is not a viable long term solution by marvin (4.00 / 5) #7 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:28:59 AM EST
Once I stop caring, it gets difficult to even show up. At my last job, I spent a year walking down the alley to the office every morning, with one song going through my head: "We gotta get out of this place If it's the last thing we ever do."

Every. Morning. Over and over and over.

You spend too much of your life at work to hate the place. Don't stay until you reach the point that flipping burgers starts to look attractive in comparison.

Once the stress spills over into your life, it's time to make a change - either leave, find a way to improve the job, or deal with it better. I had one job back in 95-96 that had me talking in my sleep. I was angry and seethingly bitter for a year afterwards if I even thought about the place (yeah ammo, that one. The local management at PSC got to me).

It is not worth it. Pull the plug before it's too late. The company is not going to take that ulcer away from you, or care about the long term effects of excessive stress such as TMJ. Nobody from the company is going to take care of your kids after you die of a heart attack, or show up at your daughter's weddings to walk them down the aisle, or attend your grandkids graduations in your place.

Take care of yourself. Nobody else can do it for you.

[ Parent ]
Sound advice. by dmg (2.00 / 0) #14 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 06:24:38 PM EST
But there's a happy medium. Not caring so much. It's about trying to get some perspective.
Also - I would add that it is much easier to get a new job when you already have one.

dmg - HuSi's most dimwitted overprivileged user.
[ Parent ]
agreemsg by aphrael (2.00 / 0) #21 Thu Jan 07, 2010 at 11:32:38 AM EST
Once I stop caring, it gets difficult to even show up


You spend too much of your life at work to hate the place.

This is one of the things Borland taught me, unfortunately. It was probably a lesson I needed to learn, but ...
If television is a babysitter, the internet is a drunk librarian who won't shut up.

[ Parent ]
Substance by littlestar (4.00 / 3) #5 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:13:55 AM EST
I didn't know were trying to hide that? I thought that was one of the purposes of writing here. But, I know how it is when too many knowns read on here.

Your work situation sounds like CBBs - he only got an extra two days off but it was nice to see him almost normal for a day before he started rewinding up again. I got him a vitamin concoction to help with sleep and stress, and it does seem to be stopping the 3am pregnancy like vomiting (I was worried he'd been sleeping around!). Sucks. I am trying to do something about it for him, different job seems to be the only answer here that would make real change, whatever it is for you, start looking into it! The stress will kill you and nobody wants that. We like having you around.

I'm sorry Christmas didn't turn out as well as one would hope. I would love to hear more about this situation, to help you but I"m guessing I won't. It makes me think of starting an online psych counselling site; what do you think? I've never seen one (though I'm sure they exist, what doesn't), and if I have the right disclaimers and that, it could be ok? Then, you could divulge all of your secrets and worries and hear back from an informed view. Hmmm.... In any case my advice with no information would certainly be to talk to her rather then containing your anger in a little ball in your belly, nicely nestled next to your iron stress ball adding to it's power. You're not going to feel better about it later, clearly. You are becoming more bitter with each passing moment as it just highlights your issue of her not noticing your being bitter. Whatever the issue, you need to let her in on your secret anger.

I hope your week brings you more smiles then the last one!


Online psych counseling .... by curmudgeon (2.00 / 0) #22 Sat Jan 09, 2010 at 02:32:05 PM EST
I think you could pick a couple clients here.
Get over it.
[ Parent ]
I broke the dongle. by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:25:13 AM EST
Years ago there was an ad that ran in Dr. Dobbs and all the other computer mags I read. The picture was of a statue with the naughty bits broken off, and the caption was "Lost your dongle?"

I can't recall what they were selling. Software DRM, probably.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

You too? by muchagecko (2.00 / 0) #8 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 11:56:33 AM EST
"Every time I think about the amount of work that I've got to do, I want to throw up. I get a swelling of bile and a bitter taste at the back of my mouth."

Shit. I thought that was just me. Except I start crying too.

A purpose gives you a reason to wake up every morning.
So a purpose is like a box of powdered donut holes?
My Name is Earl

That's because you're a girl ;) by hulver (4.00 / 2) #9 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 01:17:35 PM EST
I just clamp down a little harder on the lid of that bottle.
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
I'd drink more by muchagecko (2.00 / 0) #16 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 08:43:07 PM EST
if I didn't have so many responsibilities.

I envy you in a number of ways, which probably doesn't make you feel any better.

A purpose gives you a reason to wake up every morning.
So a purpose is like a box of powdered donut holes?
My Name is Earl

[ Parent ]
Collisions? by dmg (2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 03:10:29 PM EST
That's a blast from the past... I thought switched networks put paid to all that sort of nonsense...
dmg - HuSi's most dimwitted overprivileged user.
You still get them by hulver (2.00 / 0) #11 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 03:34:26 PM EST
When both ends try and talk at the same time.
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
Most modern switches/NICs support full duplex. by dmg (2.00 / 0) #12 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 06:20:25 PM EST
Even the really cheap ones. I would argue that unless your equipment is quite ancient you shouldn't be seeing any collisions at all - ever.
It could be a software/driver issue. Certain Sun ethernet interfaces had a nasty habit of falling back to half-duplex after a reboot, which was the cause of many a mission-critical issue at my workplace. There are patches for that. But seriously, you shouldn't have collisions in this day and age. It's a symptom that something is broken. As for the quantity of collisions, it depends on the type of traffic whether thats a lot or not. Collisions at one level cause a frame to be dropped, but you are running other protocols on top which might have bigger packet sizes, so one dropped ethernet packet could cause a larger retransmit higher up the stack, which can have a knock on effect, making the performance degradation out of proportion to the actual data loss.

This is not a troll. I really believe there should be no collisions on a modern switched ethernet...

dmg - HuSi's most dimwitted overprivileged user.
[ Parent ]
10mbps Half-duplex by hulver (2.00 / 0) #17 Thu Jan 07, 2010 at 12:21:18 AM EST
The equipment is quite old. The switch supports full duplix, but it's connected to a very old cisco box, with one of those AUI things hanging off the back. It's 10mbps half duplex.

As our internet connection is 2mbps max (synchronous) the speed of that doesn't really matter.

I don't know what the MTU size is.

The ISP is blaming frequent SSH disconnections on the equipment at our end.
Cheese is not a hat. - clock

[ Parent ]
AUI by thunderbee (4.00 / 1) #19 Thu Jan 07, 2010 at 02:23:36 AM EST
Man you just sent me 10 years back in time :)

I generally concur with all the comments on not getting killed by the job. Your life, your family, are more important then your job should ever be.

Starting to look for a new job can be a relief in itself if you're committed to leave, even if it takes a long time to find a good job.

And if you stay, learn not to care too much. It's one thing to do your job well, it's another to try and fix everything when you can't.

[ Parent ]
No you shouldn't by komet (4.00 / 1) #13 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 06:20:48 PM EST
that is what full duplex is for: so that both ends can talk at the same time.

45 collisions in 5 minutes is too many (you should not get 45 collisions in a year on an ISP handoff point), although not enough that you should notice any performance impairment. I bet there is a duplex mismatch (one end talking full duplex and the other half duplex) as a result of their end being hardcoded to full-duplex, which causes autonegotiation to fall back to half duplex. Either hardcode your end to full duplex or tell your ISP to enable autonegotiation.

<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.
[ Parent ]
10mbps Half-duplex by hulver (2.00 / 0) #18 Thu Jan 07, 2010 at 12:22:11 AM EST
See here
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
me too! by dev trash (2.00 / 0) #15 Wed Jan 06, 2010 at 06:36:43 PM EST
except it's the lack of work that does it to me. Extremes suck.

CHANGE YOUR JOB by nebbish (4.00 / 1) #20 Thu Jan 07, 2010 at 03:31:28 AM EST
But you already know that

It's political correctness gone mad!

You need to learn to say no. by Tonatiuh (4.00 / 1) #23 Mon Jan 11, 2010 at 07:00:57 PM EST
Good old chap, you really need to stand up and say no.

Somebody mentioned stop caring, I would not go that far, but you really need to detach yourself emotionally from your job.

You need to prioritize, work with all your might to make the priorities happen, and then go home at 18:00, not one single minute later than that.

If your bosses begin to complain just make sure you are documenting everything, and give reasoned arguments about why what you are being asked to do is not reasonable, then perhaps you can prioritize together and drop stuff that is not so important.

Also you should seriously consider talking to your GP, you may need to take some time off due to stress, if that would be the case it would allow you to regain your health while at the same time making clear to your employer that the current situation is no longer sustainable.

If things continue to be so bad, you could have grounds to resign and then file for unfair dismissal (it is legally not acceptable for employers to lean so heavily on employees, a job that is making you physically sick is not a reasonable state of affairs: the law is  is more likely on your side, IANAL and all that of course)....

In any case receive a Happy New Year hug.

It occurs to me | 23 comments (23 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback