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By hulver (Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 03:18:02 PM EST) (all tags)

Pig update.

I've really been stressing out about this, because I've not been able to find anywhere to cook and eat pig. I feel like I've really let you all down.

I'm sorry. I really am.

On Sunday 12th July I'll be picking up a huge quantity of pig meat. I've asked the farmer to get it butchered into joints of meat, rather than a hog roast. I certainly can't fit an entire pig in my freezer, but I might have a chance with the smaller cuts.

So what are the options.

Anybody who donated towards the pig and wants a refund is welcome to it, with pleasure. It would make me feel better, not like I'm ripping people off by promising something and not delivering.

If anybody who's donated would like a chunk of pig, they're welcome to stop by my house and pick some up. PM my and I'll send you my address.

As to cooking and eating pig, I am still trying to find somewhere that can host a fair few people.

My options were fields (can't find any that will allow cooking)
Camp sites (ditto)
Pubs (Charge a fortune)
My house (A bit pokey)

So it looks like holding it at my house is the only option.

How about Saturday the 22nd August. Which is the day before my birthday?

< Break from Reality | Alastair Darling can go fuck himself. >

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Pig | 18 comments (18 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback

(Comment Deleted) by xth (2.00 / 0) #1 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 03:30:40 PM EST

This comment has been deleted by xth

Is there a local hog roast company? by sugar spun (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 04:07:05 PM EST

They should be able to tell you where they're normally hired to cook.

Or a local park where people barbecue in summer? Somewhere where people camp that isn't a normal campsite? National Park or somesuch? A meeting place in a pub could become a severely truncated road trip to wherever the park starts, and BBQing with wild abandon could occur.

Me and Herring had an outdoor barbecue last Sunday by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 04:35:24 PM EST

It was in Savernake Forest, run by the Forestry Commission. I suspect there'll be something similar in South Yorkshire, too.

Here's two not exactly nearby, but there's the National Forest near Ashby de la Zouch, and Dalby Forest. Sorry I can't find links (I'm kind of half laid up here otherwise I'd do it thoroughly), but I did see email addresses for the rangers.

Donate my share by ad hoc

(4.00 / 6) #4 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 04:57:58 PM EST

to the Collaborative Pork Foundation.
--

British cooking can't be *that* bad... by chuckles (4.00 / 2) #5 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 05:26:54 PM EST

I can't imagine the circumstances that would lead to cooking being banned at campsites. When people go camping in UKia, do they just eat offal pudding out of the can?

The Real World We Live In

Howzabout if by johnny (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 06:17:36 PM EST

a pantload of HuSi Nordamericanos were to somehow conspire to be there. Would that change anything?

She has effectively checked out. She's an un-person of her own making. So it falls to me.--ad hoc (in the hole)

: I'm going to be about 300 miles closer by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #8 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 07:15:14 PM EST

I don't think that's close enough.

[ Parent ]

You can't find a camp site that allows cooking? by ObviousTroll (2.00 / 0) #7 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 06:46:57 PM EST

Or even a field?

That sounds a bit bizarre. What do campers eat in England?

An Angry and Flatulent Pig, Trying to Tie Balloon Animals

: Lots of camp sites allow cooking by hulver (2.00 / 0) #11 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 02:07:38 AM EST

None that I could find allow large groups. They tend to be noisy and upset the other campers.
--
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]

Also, by johnny (2.00 / 0) #9 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 10:05:58 PM EST

As I lavishly documented in an MNS diary in the hole a mere two nights ago, I, last Sunday, attended a pig roast. There was some kind of extra-large propane-fired cookout thingy on wheels. I'll bet you can find one for rent someplace. Or, at least I hope you can in England my England.

Elsewhere here on Martha's Vineyard I have some farmer friends who have had an annual pig roast for, like, a few decades now. They do it the old-fashioned way, with a big hole in the ground and a bonfire atop. So I know it can be done. However, they are farmers and the do own a backhoe, just say'n. Anyway I do attend the pig roast each year, but it's been a while since I've consumed any of the meat. Pig roasts are great tools for creating vegetarians, I think.

But you should definitely do it and then petition the House of Lords to see if they'll pass a special bill to subsidize travel to said roast for any remote Husites. HuSi being one of England's last remaining Imperial Dominions, after all.

She has effectively checked out. She's an un-person of her own making. So it falls to me.--ad hoc (in the hole)

: Hog roaster by hulver (2.00 / 0) #12 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 02:10:59 AM EST

Getting a hog roaster wasn't a problem.
Finding somewhere to roast it and accomodate enough people, in time to do it were. I can't have the pig prepared for roasting now, because I've not arranged anywhere in time to hold it.
So it's peices of pig now instead.
Which is good, because it meens sausages.
Everybody is welcome, but it will be imtimate if lots turn up.
--
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]

I don't remember if we donated/pledged by BadDoggie

(2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Jul 01, 2009 at 11:30:55 PM EST

We both want to come but with MildlyNaughtyPuppy's expected arrival now firmly forecast for the very end of July the trip is extremely unlikely. We can, however, buy out some shares and take delivery of some bits and pieces, possibly with assistance from the In-law Pork Pick-up Service.

Don't stress out over this. You tried hard to coordinate something rather complex for which most participants are spread across a couple of continents and attendance plans little better than "definite maybe". Should it go that way, no one's going to complain about holding the party at your place. Except maybe your neighbours, and a few fresh bangers ought to shut them up.

woof.

OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

Relax by Phage (2.00 / 0) #13 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 04:32:15 AM EST

</FrankieGTH>
I'd dearly love some of that pig, but I can't see myself driving 200 miles to pick up some bacon. Please keep my donation as a contribution towards the hosting costs.

However, I don't think this idea is dead. We can do this, it wasn't fair to expect you do to everything on your tod. It just needs a few more people to be involved in the set up.
I would like to pledge my support in getting this done properly for the next summer. If you need logistics, or just some hands to carry stuff about or research sites, let me know.

It's like magic realism, but not shit. - Scrymarch.

What cuts are there? by gazbo

(2.00 / 0) #14 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 09:02:14 AM EST

ISTR you posted a link to the butchery options, but I can't remember what the site was.

"Engarde!" cried the larvae, huskily. - Scrymarch

Butchery by hulver

(2.00 / 0) #15 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 10:19:10 AM EST

I went for simple, as the legs / shoulders can always have other things done to them in the future. The Bacon should be ready about the 9th August.

Legs to Leg of Pork
Shoulders to Shoulder joints
Belly to Sausages
Loin to Back bacon

Sausage choice. 1/2 Speciality, 1/2 Butchers. Both "Simply pork" flavour.

--
Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]

: I'm pretty much drooling [nt] by gazbo (4.00 / 1) #16 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 10:28:26 AM EST

"Engarde!" cried the larvae, huskily. - Scrymarch

[ Parent ]

I have an idea!! by me0w

(4.00 / 6) #17 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 11:03:58 AM EST

We could take the pig and house it in a barn. We could find it a spider friend to make webs and write stuff in said web (in lolcat of course). Then we could charge people millions to come and see it.

"the only reason we PMS is because our uterus is screaming at our brain to go out, get fucked, and have a baby ... and it makes us angry."

Please take my pork by Breaker (4.00 / 3) #18 Thu Jul 02, 2009 at 11:44:15 AM EST

As a contribution to running the site. I can't wait to see the accounts page -

Donation - Cash / paypal £8.99
Gift - Book - £5.99
Pig - bacon, sausages, belly

Don't beat yourself up over it, either.

Pig | 18 comments (18 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback