My back done went out on me, "re-activated" as they say ("they" being the nurses I was talking to at the goshdarn urgent care), and I got grilled by the doc about why i was at an urgent care and not at my docs.  My doc closes on Friday, it was 6pm on Thursday, and I was in pain.  But yeah, non-specific pain in the back and a visit to the ER is drug seeking behavior if it was being done a lot.  They checked my record...my last visit to a doctor about my back was June 6th...and the doc on duty changed his tone entirely.  He checked me out, recommended that I get my ass back into PT, and gave me some drugs.  They gave me a shot of toradol, a non-narcotic NSAID.  The nurse laid the needle right alongside a nerve, I guess, since the injection made my toes feel like they were going to pop off my foot.  Hurt worse than my damn back.

Unlike last time, they didn't hit me with demerol...my back didn't hurt as bad.  Really I just needed something to kill the spasms.  Spasms are irreversable...they cause all sorts of problems and can't be dealt with using exercises.  They're what cause me to get all twisted up.  So, not as bad this time, and the doc gave me flexiril which is fine except for two things:  1) it makes me sleep twelve or more hours and 2) it also blocks the nerve impulses ot the lower intestine, wreaking havoc with digestion.

I'd not been exercising.  I'd been injured over Xmas, then got sick, then just...stopped.  My back really lets me know when I need to get back on the ball.  This time, though, I'm going to seek professional help in the way of a physical therapist and pilates instructor.  That seems to be the best set of exercises for the back. The "typical" PT for back exercises is just pilates without the licensing.  That and some isometrics.  Combine that with my normal workout (well, what had been my normal workout) of squats, pushups, lunges and etc and maybe my back will get back in shape. My back will be back to back back back back.  I fucking love the english language. 

THANKS ENGERLAND.

So what else is new?  I am avoiding facebook, avoiding most social contact, and making my way with my head down.  And why?  Well, things are busy.  I turned 37, and on the day I did I was walking out of the office...it was a beautiful sunny day, just slightly cool...and walking to my car and I just felt OK.  Like, this is just fine.  This is right where I need to be.  I'm not tied to a career, nor measured by it, but my job is full of puzzles that make my days hard...very hard...but very satisfying. We are too busy, and I need a facilities / IT guy as well as  a lab manager and IT guy.  Know anyone?  We pay well, and we're adding headcount faster than I can buy machines. Literally.

The job can be annoying, but any job will be.  This job, though...every move I make makes a difference.  Every tweak, every fix, every little adjustment, the entire company benefits.  Likewise, when I stumble, the entire company feels it.  So I have to be on my game all the time, and I normally am.  There is stress, there is Bad Stuff at times but the benefits are tangible and worthy.  It can only get better.  Or worse.  That being said, we are too busy. We need more people.

We're also hiring developers...C and java and database types.  If you're out of work, mobile, and like small places...or, and can get a clearance...let me know.

So the job thing is there.  I mean, I don't get caught up in the "am I doing the right thing with my life?" nonsense.  I am doing what I have always done: what I have to do.  I'll always do this, regardless of the actual task.  If the whole kit goes to hell and I have to find work in a 7-11 or in the fields, I'll do it.  The labor is unimportant, but it's nice when it rewards accordingly.  Less soldiers come to harm in Iraq now.  I had a tiny, microscopic part in that.

I'll work on the rest of it. The social aspect.  Getting back with friends.  That sort of thing.  I just need a little more free time in the day, and that should happen as soon as we get a few new people into IT.

So what am I saying?  I'm content, which leads me to new things.  I'll find more time for music and writing, and less time for TV and netflix-on-demand (by the way, that $100 Roku wireless netflix on demand box?  STAY AWAY.  It is nearly perfect, and a gigantic time sink, and just stay away). I'll finally email kellnerin. I'll get together with the McClocky crew and make music. And maybe....juuuuuuuuuust maybe...I'll get my yearly BBQ / Laurea's Birthday set up and ready for the 21st of March.