Print Story I heart my home town
Diary
By MissTrish (Fri Aug 08, 2008 at 12:43:27 PM EST) travel, vandalism, ribs, sludge (all tags)
Ontario's Feel Good Town
Gem of Lake Ontario


After 8 months of solid work, I am permitted to take a week off. During this time I hope that my fingernails will regrow and that twitch of punching people near-randomly will wear away with a bit of relaxation. I will finally have the internet hooked up in my apartment. I will visit my family back at the ol' homestead. I may imbibe perhaps a glass or two of wine or light beer.

My decompression time for the first half of the week is relatively uneventful, yet wonderful. I start to remember there is a world outside my apartment, and figure it is time to head home.

In this town, there is the downtown. And then there is the uptown. And they are very different things. I have no intention to shop or gain weight, so I keep to the downtown while waiting to meet old friends at various drop points.

Apparently, there is a vandalism problem downtown.  My recent interest in bombing has made me sensitive to the presence of any tags, art, vomit sprayed on walls, etc. After wandering the main strip and its various "back streets", I am a little confused. I have only found one display of black paint - the writer is enamoured with his own name and wants everyone to see it and love it as well.

I mention my confusion to L'il P (not so little anymore), who laughs and pulls a flower from a hanging basket, tucks the blossom into my hat. "Now we are vandals."

On entering the town, the welcome signs insist that I am entering the Feel Good town with signs to spas, holistic health centres, condos. Tacked up on one of the sign posts is a small sign: "Waterfront Ribfest." This sign is repeated elsewhere throughout the town, infesting the country-side.

All of the townies I recognize have undergone one of two changes to my fresh eye. They have either doubled in size or halved. I can easily attribute serious drug use to the latter. Cocaine is easier to find than Red Bull. I am offered percocets for a reasonable price within the first hour back. Supply may also be blamed for the former as well. The lone sushi bar is abandoned (and delicious and affordable) yet I am assured that McDonalds, Wendy's and Pizza Hut are hopping.

Everyone drives. I think I saw about 10 bikes and 5 skateboards, all concentrated by the beach.

On the east side of the harbour, children scream in the water while teenagers play volleyball and sunbathe. The Yacht Club crew is conspicuous in their windbreakers.

The west side is overgrown with wildflowers and the pebble beach spreads off into the distance without any other invaders but us. A-star (not K) hucks a rock into the lake and an unexpected sucking noise follows, rather than a clean splash. The water that surges in the wake of the projectile is strongly reminiscent of the contents of a toilet the morning after a night of heavy drinking.

"Haha, booze poos."

the Gem of Lake Ontario:

A seagull flies close to the surface and stumbles - it was nearly pulled under as it tried to pry a piece of debris from the waves. Dead and bloated carp litter the beach. Another seagull goes in for a snack and I yell it away: "NO! Bird dude! Don't do it, it's not worth it!"

For awhile we are amused by trying to skip rocks off the slurry. But we are quickly bored and flee, fearing that some sort of swamp beast will emerge from the filthy waves and pull us in, like it tried with the seagull.

What follows could be best described as a quiet night in with friends enjoying intelligent debate, well-aged wine and friendly reminiscence.

I'm spending today in with my brother watching discovery channel and playing WoW. I think this is definitely my favourite part of being back here.

P.S.
Missed all y'all.

< on this and that | La Jolla, CA >
I heart my home town | 31 comments (31 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
(Comment Deleted) by lb008d (2.00 / 0) #1 Fri Aug 08, 2008 at 01:38:23 PM EST

This comment has been deleted by lb008d



Eek by R343L (4.00 / 1) #2 Fri Aug 08, 2008 at 02:43:30 PM EST
The poor lake animalia. Also, perhaps it's good I never managed to swim in lake ontario when I was in Toronto ....

Glad you had some time off!

"There will be time, there will be time / To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet." -- Eliot

I have never ever by MissTrish (2.00 / 0) #3 Fri Aug 08, 2008 at 02:56:39 PM EST
seen the lake this filthy. Not even in Toronto. Maybe I've never looked in the right place, but the ick factor was intense. With all the dead carp, I was reminded of a oil spill.

ypu're a chair
[ Parent ]
oh, the c-dot by rhooke (4.00 / 1) #4 Fri Aug 08, 2008 at 10:03:48 PM EST
  1. i knew i should have asked you to buy me drugs.
  2. and here i was rocking the recidivism and playing my warlock too.
  3. love! (to the extent that it is appropriate)


I had you in mind by MissTrish (2.00 / 0) #8 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 01:04:54 PM EST
but the dealers in c- apparently don't take visa.

ypu're a chair
[ Parent ]
that is outrageous by rhooke (2.00 / 0) #11 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 02:08:42 PM EST
what a bunch of hippies. if i sold drugs i'd take visa, mastercard, discover, paypal, and various forms of barter.

no cash, though

[ Parent ]
hey wait by rhooke (2.00 / 0) #12 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 02:10:19 PM EST
does this mean you've finally had that faucet installed, with free-flowing sweet, sweet data right in your own home?

[ Parent ]
not just that by MissTrish (2.00 / 0) #13 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 03:41:10 PM EST
but I have <ahem> completely legal and fully-paid cable. I am never moving my ass from this chair (which I finally picked up from the 'shack, btw). I may have to play D&D via webcam and cellphone tomorrow.

ypu're a chair
[ Parent ]
i love that chair by rhooke (2.00 / 0) #14 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 07:29:46 PM EST
not the one that is 256's. the green/blue one. that's one hella comfy chair.

cable is the devil. i prefer to waste my time in different ways. :)


[ Parent ]
My lake is more beautiful by littlestar (4.00 / 1) #5 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 04:36:32 AM EST
then your lake... which is so unfortunate. Although we did get the dead carp (and we know what that's about), everyone generally cleans it up. 

I'm glad that you got some nice time off. That's the living part of life. Enjoy!
*twinkle*twinkle*


What's it about? by R343L (2.00 / 0) #7 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 05:44:31 AM EST
Was there a micro-organism bloom? Some unexpected pollutant release? <fill in things I've heard sometimes cause such things>

I've never actually seen a beach full of dead fish washed up: the idea kind of terrifies me as being Not the Way Things Should Be. And gives me apocalyptic thoughts.

Rachael

"There will be time, there will be time / To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet." -- Eliot

[ Parent ]
all the carp hit the rub 'n tug by MissTrish (2.00 / 0) #9 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 01:11:53 PM EST
and came back with an STD

ypu're a chair
[ Parent ]
we get it in on lake michigan beaches by garlic (2.00 / 0) #31 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 04:10:29 PM EST
alewifes (wives?) I think.


[ Parent ]
Greatest city in the world by Clipper Ship (2.00 / 0) #6 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 05:17:05 AM EST
Just think of what Lake Ontario was like in the previous 60 years, however.

---------------

Destroy All Planets

I used to work at the local library by MissTrish (4.00 / 1) #10 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 01:16:17 PM EST
archiving old photographs. I used to love the ones from the 20s - especially the winter shots with people skating on Lake Ontario.

ypu're a chair
[ Parent ]
That's mostly american shit . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #15 Sat Aug 09, 2008 at 09:38:51 PM EST
. . . in our lake.

I had something witty to tack onto that, but I've lost it now. Something about paying green taxes for a green lake . . .

Mostly american shit by debacle (2.00 / 0) #16 Mon Aug 11, 2008 at 10:56:44 AM EST
Just like Canadians.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
Is that the most responsible . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #17 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 04:12:54 AM EST
. . . Buffalonian response you can come up with? Na na na na poo poo? I think you were more civic minded and mature than that . . .

[ Parent ]
No you don't by debacle (2.00 / 0) #18 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 04:45:16 AM EST
Don't pretend to think that I'm anything more than an angry affluent American.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
Dude, I don't have to pretend to think . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #19 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 04:55:18 AM EST
. . . anything. Just looking for a smidgeon of accountability from an american . . . I know, I know - they call me a dreamer . . .

[ Parent ]
Leave it to the Canadians by debacle (2.00 / 0) #20 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 04:58:30 AM EST
Always looking to the Americans for a handout, guidance, something.

Don't worry, Doug. We'll take care of everything.


IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
tut tut, troll . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #21 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 05:09:02 AM EST
. . . you still haven't made a cogent argument here. Did someone say no to you last night, or is it another issue?

[ Parent ]
What sort of argument do I need to make by debacle (2.00 / 0) #22 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 05:12:14 AM EST
About an abrasive comment on my opinion of the detritus that settles in the bowels of your nation-state? I think the argument speaks for itself.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
No, it doesn't . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #23 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 05:19:54 AM EST
. . . I need you to clarify. Exactly what is your position on the pollutants and shit that your nation sends into Lake Ontario?

[ Parent ]
Celine Dion by debacle (2.00 / 0) #24 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 05:22:26 AM EST
In a few generations we'll be even.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
I'll cover your Celine Dion . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #25 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 05:39:51 AM EST
. . . with a Miley Cyrus and a Garth Brooks, I raise with the Olsen twins. 

[ Parent ]
That's funny by debacle (2.00 / 0) #26 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 06:09:40 AM EST
I didn't know that any of those four were currently living in the vast barren wastelands of Canada.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
I'll take that . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #27 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 06:31:32 AM EST
. . . as a fold.

[ Parent ]
You fail by debacle (2.00 / 0) #28 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 06:43:14 AM EST
This is why we fought for Britain to keep you in 1812. We didn't want that shit.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
I win . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #29 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 06:57:01 AM EST
. . . you keep trying to troll, and I laugh.

[ Parent ]
On the contrary by debacle (2.00 / 0) #30 Tue Aug 12, 2008 at 07:00:44 AM EST
The one who wins when the troll tries to troll the troll is the troll that first realizes that ceasing to troll is a greater troll than a continuation of a stale troll.

IF YOU HAVE TWO FIRLES THOROWNF MONEY ART SUOCIDE GIRLS STRIPPER HPW CAN YPUS :OSE?!?!?!?(elcevisides).

[ Parent ]
I heart my home town | 31 comments (31 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback