Print Story Avoidenance
Diary
By blixco (Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:01:51 AM EST) (all tags)
without avoiding anything.


People with small minds in places of authority tend to mistake their rising frustration with their own inability to comprehend basic logic or well-ordered fact with anger, fear, or a desire to control things that they do not have any need to control.

Such people are often employed by law enforcement agencies worldwide, as a sort of litmus test of your citizenry and capability as a human being when faced with the living embodiment of the dense bureaucracy that haunts most officialdoms.  They also tend to be employed as door men, gate agents, customer service counter holders, standover men, and are seen with alarming density in the airline industry.

In corporate organizations anyone "above" the rank-and-file is suspect.  Middle-management tends toward kingdom building as a first priority of the day, in that they take every breath scheming their next move to create a new power base that relies on their steadfast zealotry and narrow-minded behavior. They tend to surround themselves with allies that operate under the higher principal of the middle manager, rather than operating under the delusional grandeur that is Company, Fraternity, Equality.

In these choke points of shady ethics and nepotism, one can expect to be employed by small-headed sycophants who have little to no regard for the work already done, the work being done, or the work that needs to be done.  Instead you will toil under the delusional footprint of some sort of grubby middle-management alternate reality, some place where the "important" work is nothing but self-aggrandized hand waving and the appearance of fine words of dire warning about budgetary needs and goals to be reached contained in powerpoint slide decks. These powerpoint slides are used to offload thinking in larger companies; one should approach them with the same intellectual respect and command authority that one gives a poster of a kitten on a clothesline (captioned "hang in there").

It can be assumed that the atmosphere in such a dire location would be nearly unavoidably filled with newspeak, corporatism, jingo-ism, and the almighty quarterly report. It can also be assumed that anyone with a lick of sense would prefer death by asphyxiation under the buttocks of a Greyhound Bus Lines driver or passenger on a muggy day in Mississippi.

It is at this point in your career that you will need to consider the alternatives available to you.

I suggest taking the nearest twit firmly by the lapels and ramming your forehead into his nose with enough speed and force to dislodge any future misguided attempts at managerial idealism.  This is a preventative measure best endured when one has had at least a four martini breakfast, and one can be assumed to have the correct motivation, drive, and apparent reckless numb stupidity to pass for one of those in charge.

For the non-violent types, the best way to approach situations such as this (when they become untenable) is to turn the whole thing into a game, and treat those in small-minded positions of authority as pawns in a larger field of play.  You can then sabotage or otherwise relieve command from those who would attempt to poison and destroy your brothers, playing one side versus another, using tactics and subterfuge to undermine the goals of like-minded co-workers.

Of the myriad options available, know that none will provide the deep satisfaction gained by simply getting up,

and walking out.

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Avoidenance | 23 comments (23 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
It's like MNS and NFB by sasquatchan (4.00 / 3) #1 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:08:23 AM EST
came together and had a love child, and called it blixco.



I actually started this by blixco (4.00 / 2) #2 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:09:14 AM EST
when I worked at Dell.

Just decided to cut n' paste today, and complete a few sentences.
---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

I used a condom, I swear. by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 2) #21 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 04:42:53 PM EST

Plus, I'm sterile, so somebody better check with the mailman to see who the real daddy is.


-
You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

You make me cry by Merekat (4.00 / 3) #3 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:10:50 AM EST
Or would if I were not a jaded cynic and made so partially by the people who framed me as one of the above despite me working myself to exhaustion in their behalf.



The smarter of the above people by ambrosen (4.00 / 2) #7 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:35:05 AM EST
Are excellent at framing those who are not as a worse example of the species that they themselves. It's mainly denial, with a small hint of maliciousness.

And yes, the fuckers make me cry relatively often when I think of them.

[ Parent ]

It's a natural consequence... by ana (4.00 / 2) #8 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:36:55 AM EST
of the "optically thick" style of middle-management. What goes on upstairs, unless it impacts us here in the bullpen, is a "don't need to know" thing. And likewise, what goes on in the bullpen, unless it impacts performance or schedules, stays in the bullpen. But nobody actually knows what you do for a living, until somebody with a different style tries to take over your job.

"And this ... is a piece of Synergy." --Kellnerin
[ Parent ]

I thought it was by debacle (4.00 / 2) #4 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:16:42 AM EST
Company, Futility, Eternity?

"I'm very responsive to certain stimuli, and pain is pretty much at the top of that list." - BadDoggie



Something like that. by blixco (2.00 / 0) #5 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:18:31 AM EST

---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

I walked out. by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #6 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:31:51 AM EST
Yesterday. After two hours at the place.

The person in question was the dimmest I've ever had the opportunity to meet. Except maybe for that healthcare assistant who attached me to an ECG just to take my heartbeat.

It felt kind of OKish. Except for the fact that as is often the case in encounters, the normal one's the one who's lost for words and the dim one sees something blatantly obvious to them is beyond the comprehension of the other person, and treats the normal person in a way which the dim person understands all too readily, normally being at the sharp end of it.

So, yeah, I lose 4 weeks of easy data entry and low "how-the-fuck-do-I-get-myself-out-of-bed" anxiety in which I was planning to do some more of that sorting my life out schtick. At least my contact at the temp agency pointed out to them that I did actually have the best Excel knowledge of all their temps, so she believes my side of the story. As for other people? Who knows? Many of the people on whom I depend for emotional support seem to belong to the "six of one, half a dozen of the other" school of thought.



What? by nightflameblue (4.00 / 1) #9 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:47:03 AM EST
These powerpoint slides are used to offload thinking in larger companies; one should approach them with the same intellectual respect and command authority that one gives a poster of a kitten on a clothesline (captioned "hang in there").

You give Powerpoint slides a HELL of a lot more respect than they deserve if this is how you view them. And I'm one of those people who wants to beat down anyone with that particular kitten poster because they're stupid enough to think making a kitten believe they're going to die is "cute."



Please untangle this thought and resubmit: by greyrat (4.00 / 4) #10 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 11:49:47 AM EST
"People with small minds in places of authority tend to mistake their rising frustration with their own inability to comprehend basic logic or well-ordered fact with anger, fear, or a desire to control things that they do not have any need to control."

Ouch! I think I know what you're saying here. But I really can't be sure.



And after reading the rest. by greyrat (4.00 / 1) #11 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 12:04:05 PM EST
I realized how timely this diarrheism is. Unfortunately, my whole tale of woe that you support had to be redacted so that I can keep my job. Just imagine one of RECs root cause 17 ESCALATE! ESCALATE! ESCALATE! entries here...

[ Parent ]

It's easy: by blixco (4.00 / 2) #17 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:22:09 PM EST
If you give simple minded people any authority, they tend to abuse that authority.

Those that do not abuse the authority are not simple minded.  Or not as simple minded.
---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

Veruy good. by greyrat (4.00 / 1) #18 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:26:40 PM EST
You'll get my bill for editorial duties in a few days.

[ Parent ]

I'll re-do it: by blixco (4.00 / 2) #22 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 07:14:15 PM EST
People with small minds in positions of authority tend to mistake their frustration (normally in their own total inability to comprehend basic logic or well-ordered fact) with anger, fear, or a desire to control things that they do not have any need to control.
---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

Wow by ucblockhead (4.00 / 2) #12 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 12:19:00 PM EST
Looks like someone's got a case of the 'Mondays'!
----
ウセーバラケダ


It's Tuesday... by wiredog (4.00 / 2) #13 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 12:32:55 PM EST


Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

[ Parent ]

Small minded in authority by Herring (4.00 / 1) #14 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:04:29 PM EST
For example.

You can't outlaw rabbits! They'll just go underground - Milton Jones


You might think it's outrageous anyway. . . by nightflameblue (4.00 / 2) #15 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:15:14 PM EST
but imagine the nuclear power of that news on a Transformers message board.

[ Parent ]

I refuse to imagine it. by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #19 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:55:56 PM EST
Imagining that volume of outrage makes my head hurt. Lots.

[ Parent ]

Oh come on, it's good fun. by nightflameblue (4.00 / 1) #20 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 02:01:43 PM EST
Especially when the biggest string of back and forth happened from somebody saying that design sucks and should have been outlawed a long time ago. How ANYONE doesn't see that as funny is beyond me, yet apparently several dozen fanbois got panty-bunched about it enough to have to post hundreds of rebuttals.

HILARIOUS doesn't even begin to cover it.

[ Parent ]

That's actually by blixco (2.00 / 0) #16 Tue Jun 03, 2008 at 01:21:06 PM EST
what spurned this cut and paste...I've had the bones of this text sitting in a file for years, after spending maybe five minutes on it back when I worked at Dell.

The first paragraph comes from that goddamn news article about that guy.
---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

*raises flaming lighter* [n/t] by rizzo (4.00 / 1) #23 Fri Jun 13, 2008 at 05:07:28 PM EST
[Not Transforming]
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Avoidenance | 23 comments (23 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback