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Now I get it

By riceowlguy (Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 02:45:17 PM EST) (all tags)

Houston Chronicle = EPIC FAIL

Back in college I didn't understand why all the hipster liberals hated the Houston Chronicle and said that it was a horrible newspaper. Hey, the comics were there and that's all I really cared about. Now, I get it.

Today's headlines and secondary-top headlines from the newspapers of the four largest cities in the US:

New York Times:
Casualties of War: 4000 Dead: Messages From the Front Lines
JPMorgan Raises Bid for Bear Stearns to $10 a Share

Chicago Tribune:
Clintons losing their luster with black Democratic voters
Clinton, Obama: 'Bringing our troops home'

Los Angeles Times:
Flames engulf 5-story condo site
JPMorgan sweetens deal for Bear Stearns

Houston Chronicle:
Can't get away from work? Hit the bar without leaving your desk. Check out our Seensters photos from the Harp.
Jurors deliberating in case of microwaved baby

You're doing it wrong, H-Chron.

(I realize that somebody on ytmnd.com did a similar thing comparing Fox News to CNN and MSNBC last night. Same basic problem.)

In less ranty news, Easter is here! Hooray for coffee! Hooray for not having to sing every night! Hooray for church making me happy again!

In preparation for a camping trip this weekend I've been experimenting with different firestarting methods. On a recent walk I noticed all this nice fluffy green stuff on the ground, shed by oak trees as spring arrives. It looked like it would make excellent tinder, so I gathered some up and tried it last night in the barbecue. Not so much. Sure, when the match came near it it flared up, but as soon as the match went away it went out. Like steel wool, except much, much smellier. Anyway, no need to bring any of that stuff with me.

Later.

< Let's cut straight to the point, shall we? | Vacation recap >

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Now I get it | 37 comments (37 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback

Houston has a lot of inhabitants. by ammoniacal (4.00 / 3) #1 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 02:50:56 PM EST

What it lacks is the presence to be a large city, and it will never have it.

General rules are: All skirts no lower then [sic] two inches below the knee (unless it's for Church) --Travis Frey

exactly! by clock (4.00 / 4) #3 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 03:03:20 PM EST

houston lacks identity and i'm not sure it will ever find it.

_{Clock is right. [nt] --vorheesleatherface}

[ Parent ]

I'm not sure this is entirely bad by riceowlguy (4.00 / 1) #6 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 03:51:33 PM EST

It seems like no identity is better than New York's attitude, LA's shallowness or Chicago's bizzare politics.

[ Parent ]

at least one of those by sasquatchan (4.00 / 1) #7 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:06:02 PM EST

has a winning sports team..

[ Parent ]

And you can drink at your desk! by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 2) #8 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:23:59 PM EST

Sounds like y'all have it all over backwaters like New York, LA, and Chicago.

[ Parent ]

The NY publishing business by georgeha (4.00 / 2) #9 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:31:28 PM EST

isn't full of drunken proofreaders, cokehead fact checkers and editors with whiskey bottles in their desk drawers? Why do you crush our illusions?

[ Parent ]

You callin' Kellnerin a drunken cokehead? by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 1) #18 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 06:14:06 PM EST

For shame, Mr. Ha? I expected better of you. Well, not me. This is pretty much what I though you'd do. But somebody out there probably expected better and I'm certain you've really disappointed so-and-so so-and-so from wherever wherever.

[ Parent ]

: I thought she lived in Boston by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #20 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 06:29:47 PM EST

[ Parent ]

I wasn't saying that by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #10 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:33:08 PM EST

I just don't understand what "identity" means for a city, and why, as ammo claims, Houston will never have one, and just what that has to do with our newspaper being terrible at doing news.

[ Parent ]

Whoops by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #12 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:43:18 PM EST

clock talked about 'identity', ammo talked about 'presence'. My bad. Both are pretty nebulous.

[ Parent ]

Nothing personal, but... by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #14 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:54:09 PM EST

what I essentially meant was that I'd rather lose a gross of Houstons than lose one SF, Boston, or Memphis.

General rules are: All skirts no lower then [sic] two inches below the knee (unless it's for Church) --Travis Frey
[ Parent ]

: Anytime somebody says by riceowlguy (4.00 / 1) #16 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 05:34:02 PM EST

"Nothing personal, but" or "No offense, but" you can be assured of one thing: somebody's about to be offended.

[ Parent ]

i guess my point is... by clock (4.00 / 1) #17 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 05:55:21 PM EST

...when you (someone outside of TX) think of chicago, new york or LA you get a picture in your head. when you think of houston (if you were ever to think of houston because honestly, why would you?) you think "houston we have a problem."

as such, there's not much to rally around or to make you feel like you're someplace you belong. it's a feeling of generica that i guess doesn't work for me in a lot of ways. it isn't good or bad...it's just odd to think that such large city can exist without any sense of self or distinguishing characteristics.

stacky makes a good point: "imagine yourself in houston!" what does that conjure? probably nothing. it's just kinda sad.

_{Clock is right. [nt] --vorheesleatherface}

[ Parent ]

Y'all got that big ol' Budweiser plant. by chuckles (2.00 / 0) #19 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 06:14:16 PM EST

We just have these dinky little microbreweries in the Pacific Northwest.

Skateboarding is a crime.

[ Parent ]

Oh it conjures plenty by blixco (4.00 / 1) #30 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 10:45:12 AM EST

for those of us who grew up in west Texas.

Plenty. Humid, polluted, sprawling, yet home to NASA. I guess Florida wasn't swampy enough?

I don't really hate Houston, but I'd rather be here, where I can fool myself into thinking that we're different.
---------------------------------
"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

Food and music by riceowlguy (4.00 / 1) #32 Thu Mar 27, 2008 at 11:08:20 PM EST

If you're into food, especially food of a variety of cultures, this is a great place to be. It's all here, it's all good and it's mainly all pretty cheap. You can probably find a higher-quality example of any given cuisine in New York but it will cost twice as much or more.

If you're into live music that does not involve electric guitars, Houston is great. I get so pissed off whenever I hear people saying that the Houston music scene sucks. No, the Houston indie rock scene sucks. For classical music and theatre it's great. Again, better in New York but much more expensive. Plus, as somebody who is usually up on stage instead of in the audience, Houston has a unique (I suppose) circumstance of having a lot of high-quality performing groups which good amateurs can participate in, which receive a good amount of local attention. I imagine NY has nonprofessional choirs and such but it seems like they would be completely overshadowed by the pro organizations and it would also be impossible for them to have access to facilities.

Anyway, that and the fact that most of my friends live here keeps me here for the time being.

[ Parent ]

i agree by clock (2.00 / 0) #33 Fri Mar 28, 2008 at 07:53:23 AM EST

there are fantastic restaurants here (though we prefer cooking to eating out because we're weird like that) and in every community i've ever lived (from cleveland to NYC to nowhere, mn [population 200]) there have been groups of people who get together and perform because it's what we as a species seem to really enjoy. so i'd never argue that there's no scene and since every scene is unique, there's no point in saying one sucks without reference.

i simply think houston doesn't know what it is. and it's odd for me because it's the first city i've lived in that didn't have a sense of self. i may have posed it in a derogatory manner above but in all honesty i'm more fascinated and curious about it than anything else. it's very strange to me.

but in general, it's not really my city. we'll be here for a bit but not for the long haul.

_{Clock is right. [nt] --vorheesleatherface}

[ Parent ]

I've been meaning to ask by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #34 Fri Mar 28, 2008 at 11:01:32 AM EST

You've expressed in previous postings on this site that Houston isn't where you want to be long-term, because it doesn't fit in with the lifestyle you and Stacky want, and I've been meaning to ask what you meant by that. Certainly there are disadvantages for me there as well. I'd like to be less dependent on a car to get around. I'd like easier access to outdoor recreation. I'd like to be able to afford a house less than twenty miles away from where I work and play. Is it pretty much just that for you guys or are there other things?

[ Parent ]

pretty much dead on with all counts by clock (2.00 / 0) #35 Fri Mar 28, 2008 at 11:22:26 AM EST

we want less driving. we want more outdoor activities. we'd like more community activities (festivals, etc). and honestly? i want a dozen or more guitar shops in a 5 mile radius. and i'm big on places with the college town vibe. it's how i grew up. austin looks pretty good by those standards, not that it doesn't have it's down sides.

we're really on the green/minimalist living track right now and houston really isn't conducive to that.

also, i can't lie, the climate here is not at all my speed. the humidity alone is enough to destroy me.

_{Clock is right. [nt] --vorheesleatherface}

[ Parent ]

I try and tell myself by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #36 Fri Mar 28, 2008 at 11:37:07 AM EST

that the humidity is good for my skin (very few leathery-looking people around here) and good for my voice. Other than that...yeah. Give it a couple of years and you'll get used to it (or at least tired of complaining about it).

Houston is as conducive to minimalist living as you want. You can go live under a bridge by the bayou...burn trash and cook carp over it!

[ Parent ]

: mmm...carp! by clock (4.00 / 1) #37 Fri Mar 28, 2008 at 11:46:16 AM EST

um...or not!
yeah...i'll get tired of complaining about the heat one of these days...but not TODAY!

_{Clock is right. [nt] --vorheesleatherface}

[ Parent ]

Can you get an M202? by georgeha (4.00 / 4) #2 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 02:52:32 PM EST

they're more effective than a Bic, though I'm not sure if Texas is lenient enough to let you buy one.

: The Partrige Family is on line 2 by riceowlguy (4.00 / 1) #4 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 03:04:06 PM EST

Also WEB Griffin and I'm sure a whole host of other people.
I've gotten interested in the subject of how to start fires with a bowdrill, which I don't have, nor do I have the kind of wood it seems you need, but in general I'd like to be as natural as possible. My backup emergency firestarter is cotton balls soaked in melted petroleum jelly and allowed to cool. Cheap, effective and easily portable (in a plastic baggie). Hopefully they will be unnecessary.

[ Parent ]

The Post by buttercup (4.00 / 1) #5 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 03:32:44 PM EST

The reason Houstonians hate the Chron so much is because it bought out and then killed its only competition, the Houston Post. Having two papers made both better. Now there's no reason for the Chron to do anything more than sell Sunday advertising supplements.

Enjoy your camping this weekend! Here's the firestarting recipe we'd use in the Girl Scouts. Take a cardboard egg carton and stuff the cups with dryer lint. Pour melted paraffin over the lint and allow to harden. Tear the cups into individual firestarters and store them in an old coffee can.

"Too slow, Chicken Merengo!" — Cat

Awesome. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #13 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:49:20 PM EST

Enjoy your camping this weekend! Here's the firestarting recipe we'd use in the Girl Scouts. Take a cardboard egg carton and stuff the cups with dryer lint. Pour melted paraffin over the lint and allow to harden. Tear the cups into individual firestarters and store them in an old coffee can.

The next time I need to stuff a firestarter into a Girl Scout, I'll know just what to use!

[ Parent ]

I think it's more for by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #21 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 07:38:06 AM EST

starting Girl Scouts on fire. Can't see why you'd want to do that because, if you did, they wouldn't be able to sell any more Thin Mints. And Thin Mints are, as you know, the crack cocaine of the cookie world.

Earth First!
_{(We can strip mine the rest later.)}
[ Parent ]

Of course. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #23 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 08:15:14 AM EST

But you don't start them on fire by just placing them in the same general area as a firestarter. No, no, you gotta stuff them firestarters in them to make it count!

And the world could do with a few less thin-mints. Because for every box of thin-mints, some bastard is buying those horrible oatmeal concoctions they call cookies.

[ Parent ]

What! by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #24 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 08:22:49 AM EST

the world could do with a few less thin-mints.

Oh, right, you're one of those Upper Northern Midwesterners from Dakota or Minnesota or somewhere like that where everyone is of Good Norwegian Lutheran Stock and thinks that Suffering is Good For The Soul

And that's why you hate Thin Mints. Because they are yummy and decadent.

Earth First!
_{(We can strip mine the rest later.)}
[ Parent ]

No, no, you misunderstand. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #25 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 09:16:50 AM EST

I love thin mints. But everybody that buys them also buys a box of those gawd-awful caramel covered oatmeal things and expects you to eat as many of those as you do thin mints because, heaven forbid somebody just not buy the thing they hate. There's some weird "I have to buy one of each or someone's feelings will be hurt" thing going on in this area. So girl-scout cookies are bought not on merit, but on strange associations based on type.

If we could get just thin mints, and only thin mints, I'd be all for it. As it is, we're better off with fewer girl scouts because I'm not eating any more of the crappy cookies just to get at the thin mints.

[ Parent ]

I don't by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #26 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 09:27:43 AM EST

I just buy Thin Mints. But I live in the South, where people are reasonable about the simpler pleasures.

Earth First!
_{(We can strip mine the rest later.)}
[ Parent ]

: Yeah, we suck. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #27 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 09:31:36 AM EST

Everybody's all about "taking the bad with the good." Even with cookies. I blame religion.

[ Parent ]

I know your pain... by atreides (4.00 / 1) #11 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 04:39:33 PM EST

I find the Austin Chronicle more useful than the Austin American-Statesman.

_{He sails from world to world in a flying tomb, serving gods who eat hope.}

Erg by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #29 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 10:10:47 AM EST

We have the Houston Press. It's a different kind of newspaper, basically the newspaper equivalent of an NPR feature program like All Things Considered or This American Life. Very in depth reporting and willing to talk about things mainstream newspapers aren't, but it's not the same as a daily newspaper that actually covers the news.

[ Parent ]

: I stand by my statement... by atreides (2.00 / 0) #31 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 03:26:45 PM EST

...which shows you how little regard I have for the Statesman.
_{He sails from world to world in a flying tomb, serving gods who eat hope.}
[ Parent ]

What you need is this by Gedvondur (2.00 / 0) #15 Mon Mar 24, 2008 at 05:26:04 PM EST

http://www.northerntool.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/product_6970_266859_266859

http://tinyurl.com/2fcnde

500,000BTU asphalt torch. Lights even the wettest wood. Also, melts glass, aluminum lawn chairs, and does a dandy job on household garbage.

Gedvondur
"...I almost puked like a pregnant StackyMcRacky." --MillMan

My hometown newspaper by wiredog (2.00 / 0) #22 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 07:41:58 AM EST

is The Washington Post. Our headline today:

Bush: War's Outcome 'Will Merit the Sacrifice'
Gen. Petraeus plans to tell Congress in April that
the withdrawal of U.S. forces from Iraq that began
late last year will continue until the end of July.
Heavy Fighting in Basra

Earth First!
_{(We can strip mine the rest later.)}

: Even being a mouthpeice for the president by riceowlguy (2.00 / 0) #28 Tue Mar 25, 2008 at 10:02:17 AM EST

is better than navel-gazing.

[ Parent ]

Now I get it | 37 comments (37 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback