Print Story a quiet moment
Diary
By StackyMcRacky (Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 10:51:28 AM EST) (all tags)
so i will write a diary.


I picked my parents up from the airport last night.  After giving them the Dolly report, they were pleased she was "so well behaved."  Um, whatever.  They also weren't angry at the boarding place issue, and were quite surprised that I called the place and complained.  My parents have NO business owning a dog, especially not a JRT.

In other parent news, I took the dude over to visit them today and my mother cornered me on who we'd leave the dude with if clock and I both died.  I have this horrible problem of a) always answering my mother's questions and b) answering them truthfully.  She was livid when I told her clock's brother.  I can't believe how pissed off she was.  I also can't believe the things she said to me after that.  She pretty much ignored me the rest of the time I was at their house.  Nice.  As usual, I'm a bit miffed at her.  I guess I will never be able to redeem myself in her eyes ever again. 

I need to get the hell out of living in the same town as them.

In other news, I think this year will be the year for tomatoes in our garden.  I did a ton of reasearch, and think I finally came up with a good growing combo.  1 week in, and the plants have already doubled in size.  Stay tuned for the outcome!

Ugh, my son isn't so good at taking naps these days.  He tends to wake up crying after 45 minutes or so.  I let him cry it out, and he's usually back to sleep in about 5.  Still, the boy needs a 2 hour nap every afternoon!!  We don't like the evening crab he becomes when he doesn't get enough nap.  Just go back to sleep, kiddo!!!

We've once again gone on a purge binge, and we're culling the crap out of our home.  I'm very happy with the non-cluttered state of things.  If we could just find the time/motivation to take care of the floors, I would be a very happy camper.  Next house: NO carpet. (don't worry, clock, we'll get rugs for the bedrooms!)

gah, the kid is still crying.  I should go be a good mother and comfort him or some such.  Maybe I'll just take a nap with him.

< Attention Web Surfing Infidels | "Memory Corruption" >
a quiet moment | 31 comments (31 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Hey by kwsNI (4.00 / 3) #1 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 11:02:06 AM EST
Next house: NO carpet. (don't worry, clock, we'll get rugs for the bedrooms!)

Most people put beds in there, cuts down on the rug burns.  ;)

Where the kid goes by ucblockhead (2.00 / 0) #2 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 11:25:06 AM EST
Fortunately for us, both of our sisters are unacceptable choices, so we are ducking the issue by simply refusing not to die.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
refusing not to die. by garlic (4.00 / 1) #10 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 01:28:55 PM EST
uh.. I guess I'll take him then...???


[ Parent ]
er... by ucblockhead (2.00 / 0) #13 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 02:10:07 PM EST
That came out wrong.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
[ Parent ]
It's too late. by garlic (4.00 / 1) #21 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 09:05:00 PM EST
I'm gonna name him Bobby Dunbar.


[ Parent ]
ah well by ucblockhead (2.00 / 0) #30 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 06:36:38 AM EST
At least he's not with my sister-in-law. Or [shudder] my sister.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
[ Parent ]
hey by alprazolam (2.00 / 0) #31 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 08:58:13 AM EST
don't you see those signs around town? you don't mess with the dunbars, ya here?

[ Parent ]
We've decided on my parents by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #3 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 11:31:07 AM EST
though I forget if we've made it official. They see the girls weekly (at a minimum), they're relatively young, and they did an okay job with us.


parents are not acceptable for us by StackyMcRacky (4.00 / 1) #6 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 12:24:25 PM EST
we want our parents to be grandparents, not being old and raising a child.

[ Parent ]
It's a tough question. by ObviousTroll (2.00 / 0) #11 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 01:38:01 PM EST
My dad died and mom is still working in a fairly manual job at the age of 62. SWHTL's parents divorced before we married and her mom is in the same shape mine is in - and I don't think her dad is a serious candidate.

Of my five siblings, the oldest (but for me) finally moved out and never plans on kids. The next one down is a proud Pennsylvania redneck with... uneven... success with her own children. Next one is living the yuppy dream in another state, with three genius toddlers and a husband who cheats on her. Next one down, well, I love him dearly but he and his wife are still struggling with this "real life" concept that has been thrust upon them. And the last one - well, if my sister is a redneck, he's a real life (allegedly) reformed biker thug with five of his own living in a saltines box.

So, redneck sister it is, although, scary part is that SWHTL have started the process of wills several times but never seem to get around to jumping through all the hoops that Pennsylvania wants you to jump through. A simple will that says "everything I have goes to her, and if we both die it goes to the kids" ran to something like 40 pages of legal boiler plate when the software program printed it out - and we never got it notarized.

--
Has anybody seen my clue? I know I had it when I came in here.

[ Parent ]
i've got none of my own (yet) by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #17 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 05:16:48 PM EST
but i'm designated guardian of my own siblings if something happens to both of my parents. it's a very strange feeling, knowing they trust me enough to raise the rest of their kids, but it also scares the hell out of me that i'd be an instant parent to teenage boys. being a parent in general sort of scares me, which i hear means i'll probably do it right.
---------
if de-virgination results in me being able to birth hammerhead sharks, SIGN ME UP!!! --misslake
[ Parent ]
Parents... by dark nowhere (2.00 / 0) #23 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 12:49:14 AM EST
I see it from a different angle: children shouldn't be raised by people of their grandparents' generation.

It might be a bad sample, but the people I know who have been raised by grandparents and older parents generally seem to have serious... disconnects. I  don't mean to criticize the elderly, of course, but I think it's natural to come a time when your bag of tricks isn't suited to raising children.

Plus, who would want their parents raising their children? That flies in the face of the whole rebellious teen phase that we've all (our parents included) had to endure the rampant folly of. A costly investment not to be wasted.

Chill out, snowflake.

[ Parent ]
The tactful answer by theboz (2.00 / 0) #4 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 12:04:49 PM EST
In other parent news, I took the dude over to visit them today and my mother cornered me on who we'd leave the dude with if clock and I both died.  I have this horrible problem of a) always answering my mother's questions and b) answering them truthfully.  She was livid when I told her clock's brother.

You wouldn't want to be a burden on your parents, who should be enjoying their lives without kids, so you would choose clock's brother who is younger and more financially able to put your son through college and everything.  Of course, your son would definitely get to spend time with his grandparents.  There are ways to tell the truth without pissing people off too badly.

I need to get the hell out of living in the same town as them.

You say that now, but I think if you were far things would be different.  I wish my parents lived nearby.  It would be nice to have a babysitter, it would be nice to be able to hang out with family sometimes, and it would be nice to have someone come and give us assistance when there is work to be done that we can't do because the baby is taking up too much time.  I think if/when you guys move, you'll miss living near your family.  A better idea than moving far is to move far enough that you can only see them on some weekends, except in an emergency.  You could still be in the Houston area and live over an hour away from them so easily that it might be better just to buy a house somewhere else in town.
In other news, I think this year will be the year for tomatoes in our garden.  I did a ton of reasearch, and think I finally came up with a good growing combo.  1 week in, and the plants have already doubled in size.  Stay tuned for the outcome!

Do you have any advice on where to get information about planting stuff in this climate?  My mom's advice is not that relevant, and I want to plant some food as well.  It's just that I have no idea where to begin.
- - - - -
That's what I always say about you, boz, you have a good memory for random facts about pussy. -- joh3n
Well by anonimouse (4.00 / 1) #7 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 12:48:08 PM EST
Mrs Mouse's mother lives about 20 miles away, which is the right distance (close enough to babysit, far enough to not be a nuisance)

Girls come and go but a mortgage is for 25 years -- JtL
[ Parent ]
In soviet texas by ad hoc (2.00 / 0) #16 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 04:20:44 PM EST
20 miles is only the other side of town.
--
The three things that make a diamond also make a waffle.
[ Parent ]
Obviously by anonimouse (2.00 / 0) #22 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 09:58:52 PM EST
The "correct" distance from your parents varies by geographical location. It perhaps is even a function of 3D location. Scientists are woorking hard on this problem, but got sidetracked by not realising that Einstein's Theory of Relativity was not about the correct distance to live from your relatives....

Girls come and go but a mortgage is for 25 years -- JtL
[ Parent ]
according to my mother by StackyMcRacky (4.00 / 1) #8 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 01:00:37 PM EST
the correct answer was my sister and brother-in-law.  no other answer would suffice.  I didn't even go into the reasons why my sister and bil are the worst possible choice - that would have been a bigger fight.

my parents lived far from their families, but managed to make everything work when we were kids.  the secret is to find other families with kids similar age.  i'm currently working that angle myself so i don't have to be dependent on my parents for babysitting.  for every 1 time they babysit, i get at least 5 comments that are really mean and hurtful.  it is increasingly becoming a very unhealthy relationship - i'd rather move before it becomes worse.

plus, we're just totally burnt out on houston.  this city does nothing for the lifestyle we want and are trying to live.

the best resource i have is "Texas Organic Vegetable Gardening."  It does an awesome job of summing up everything you need to know about gardening here.  you can pick it up at your local B&N.  there are other resources, but they aren't as concise as this one book.  also: raised beds are the ONLY way to go here.

[ Parent ]
My thoughts by theboz (2.00 / 0) #20 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 05:52:25 PM EST
my parents lived far from their families, but managed to make everything work when we were kids.  the secret is to find other families with kids similar age.

My parents were the same, but it ended up just meaning that they had no life.  I don't know if that's how your parents did it, but it gets a bit old not being able to have a social life.  I understand your strategy though.  My wife and I would offer to be one of those other families, but unless you're heading down 59 or something, it's pretty inconvenient.  Still, if there's anything we can do to help let us know.
for every 1 time they babysit, i get at least 5 comments that are really mean and hurtful.  it is increasingly becoming a very unhealthy relationship - i'd rather move before it becomes worse.

What about clock's dad?  Is he a competent babysitter, or is it that he's good at being a grandfather and spoiling the baby only?
plus, we're just totally burnt out on houston.  this city does nothing for the lifestyle we want and are trying to live.

I understand completely.  We left last time hoping to make things a bit better, but ended up being miserable because we went to Ohio which is even worse, but there are better places to live.  I've considered looking for jobs elsewhere again, but with the economy failing, I'm probably better off staying in Houston at my current stable job.  If I remember correctly, clock's job is for a larger company, so he might be able to transfer somewhere and keep the stability of his job.  Plus depending on where you go, you might be able to take advantage of the housing market prices that the rest of the nation is suffering through.
the best resource i have is "Texas Organic Vegetable Gardening."  It does an awesome job of summing up everything you need to know about gardening here.

I'll check it out, thanks.
- - - - -
That's what I always say about you, boz, you have a good memory for random facts about pussy. -- joh3n
[ Parent ]
in no particular order... by clock (2.00 / 0) #27 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 03:14:32 AM EST
we'd be more than happy to snatch up your baby if you two ever need it!  i drive to sugar land every f'n day so the whining i hear from people about "driving across town" rolls right off of my back.  i don't even notice it any more.  i think we need to get together more in general.  it does the kids good to hang out with other kids of the same age (the dude is rolling around like a madman after that one day with Sofia) and i'm sure it does us good to interface with other adults in a non-work setting.

my dad would be a great babysitter...if he were ever in town.  he travels A LOT for his job and while i'm sure my stepmother wouldn't mind watching the dude, i get the feeling she might be weirded out by it.  i could be wrong.  mostly, we've just been lucky and not really needed a babysitter.  we're weird.

we're in H-town until 2010 and that's pretty much how it is.  not a lot of negotiating there.  what we need to do is minimize the impact and damage of the stereotypical mother-daughter relationship.  it's a pain in the ass.

and do check out the book.  our tomatoes already look great! 


I agree with clock entirely --Kellnerin

[ Parent ]
You're right by theboz (4.00 / 1) #28 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 03:47:53 AM EST
we'd be more than happy to snatch up your baby if you two ever need it!

Thanks, I appreciate the offer and may take you up on that in May, unless in-laws are around (I'd like to be able to celebrate my birthday this year by at least going out to dinner.)
i think we need to get together more in general.  it does the kids good to hang out with other kids of the same age (the dude is rolling around like a madman after that one day with Sofia) and i'm sure it does us good to interface with other adults in a non-work setting.

I agree.  Actually, you may not know the "back roads" much, but we're about 15 minutes or so from Sugar Land.  Perhaps some Friday Stacky and the baby can drive down to my house and hang out with the wife and daughter, then when you and I get off work we can just meet there as a central location.  Additionally, my wife has been meaning to respond to Stacky's email, but things have been very hectic lately (I should write a diary here some time) so we've not had much of a chance to do anything.

It's amazing how babies can learn from each other.  Sofia has made her biggest advances when she has been around other babies for a while.  They soak up all sorts of knowledge so quickly.
- - - - -
That's what I always say about you, boz, you have a good memory for random facts about pussy. -- joh3n

[ Parent ]
Less tactful answer by ad hoc (4.00 / 2) #15 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 04:20:01 PM EST
"your behavior shows I made the right choice."
--
The three things that make a diamond also make a waffle.
[ Parent ]
I prefer . . . by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 1) #24 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 01:33:46 AM EST
"It was that or the white slavery route - and we knew how strongly you felt about white slavery."

[ Parent ]
Planting in the SouthWest by wiredog (4.00 / 1) #25 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 02:42:02 AM EST
This was invaluable when I moved from VA to UT. This may have some overlap for Tejas.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

[ Parent ]
Good Point: by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #5 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 12:07:49 PM EST
If you want that idea to happen smoothly, make sure both your wills reflect that wish.

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

we have a meeting with a lawyer scheduled by StackyMcRacky (4.00 / 1) #9 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 01:01:13 PM EST
so it will all be good.

[ Parent ]
Guardian by Phil the Canuck (2.00 / 0) #12 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 01:38:56 PM EST
That would be my brother and his wife.  I know they'd be raised 'properly' in a home where they wouldn't always take a back seat, and he has the assets to grind their asshole uncle into a fine legal paste if there was a fight.

Please share tomato secret. by miker2 (4.00 / 1) #14 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 02:51:41 PM EST
The house I close on soon has a nice garden that I can't wait to plant.

Ah, sociopathy. How warm, how comforting, thy sweet embrace. - MNS
YMMV by StackyMcRacky (4.00 / 2) #18 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 05:24:11 PM EST
growing stuff in Houston requires a certain skill, as our soil is complete crap.  My sister in Philly has had NO problems growing all kinds of stuff in her yard.

This is the 3rd year we've attempted tomatoes, and I think the soil is finally OK.  We built a raised bed and filled it with compost and peat moss the last few years.  This year I added only a single bag of composted peat moss (cheating!) and mixed it in.

I found a book that listed the best varieties for this area, and found 4 at a local nursery (note: NOT Home Depot or Lowes!).  When I dug the hole for the transplants, I poured in a bunch of 0-18-0 Phosphate, and some 4-2-6 organic fertilizer.  The book said you can't have too much of either in the transplant hole.  After filling with soil, I then poured a ring of the fertilizer around each plant.  Finally, I mulched the hell out of it - 1 deep layer of native hardwood mulch, and then another layer of pine needles (fresh from the gutters on the house).  I check the soil every day, and make sure it stays moist (tomatoes are mostly water, after all).

Good luck!

[ Parent ]
The little dudes... by reza (4.00 / 1) #19 Mon Mar 17, 2008 at 05:42:54 PM EST
When I was first separating and getting divorced, the quick and easy answer was "my parents then my brother and sister in law". 

Since then, things have changed...  Brother and SIL adopted a son and have their hands full, and my parents are getting old.  Mom turns 70 this year, dad is 73.  Not that it would hold them back!  Except with my boys being 4 & 5, that would make my dad like 81ish when the driver's ed would start...soooooooo, maybe not a good idea.

I'm considering my brother, wife passed, never had kids.  He'd be awesome with them...but logistics, not sure.  I'm not dying tonight, but it's something I should figure and readjust the will to take into account.

BUT-- at any point had I ever suggested family from the ex'es side?  Wooooooooooooo boy...I'd not be here today.
Yannowhaddamean?


" Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind do not matter, and those who matter do not mind!" Dr. Seuss

I need to get the hell out by wiredog (4.00 / 1) #26 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 02:44:13 AM EST
I hear Bob's moving from Clevesburh to PA. Maybe he knows of a good cheap house up there.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

Phx is a nice city by cam (2.00 / 0) #29 Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 04:38:19 AM EST
nt


cam
Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

a quiet moment | 31 comments (31 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback