Print Story .Bread and judgement
By riceowlguy (Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 09:44:24 AM EST) (all tags)
and Merry Christmas to you all.

I'm currently waiting for some rolls to proof before baking; they are based on the bread recipe that my Great-Grandmother Ruth (Dad's Mom's Mom) used to make daily, back when folks used to make their own bread every day.  It's definitely bread for people who are out doing farm work all day, not programmers.  White flour, whole milk, butter, eggs, sugar - just this side of being cake, actually.  Dad only makes them once a year, and I seem to make them once every year too, although I usually just make loaves for my own personal consumption.  This year I'm doing rolls for a choir pot-luck between services this evening.

I just got finished reading the "Fuck Christmas, we aren't having it this year" article over on k5.  Some of the points are well taken, and in fact within my own immediate family we decided to have a one-year hiatus on gifts, mainly because we couldn't think of anything to give each other.  I was most interested, however, in the "we're not judging anyone who does celebrate Christmas" statement near the end of the article.

Jim Rome has said on multiple occasions that "anytime you hear the phrase 'no offense', you can be sure of one thing: somebody's about to be offended."  I've heard many variations on the "I'm not judging you for not X" theme over the years, and I understand that the person saying it means it well, but it wears thin.  The fact remains that if you take a position of "I don't drink", "I don't eat meat", "I believe in God", "I don't celebrate Christmas", etc., unless you explain why that position only applies to you (e.g. "I don't drink because of a history of alcoholism in my family"), it's impossible for another person not to feel judged.  If you believe X is right, then you must believe that !X is wrong.

I hope that all of you reading this are someplace warm (or cool, as your preference dictates) with people that you love (even if it's just yourself) and that you have time to relax and enjoy.  In other words, Merry Christmas.

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Merry Christmas, Clone by Gedvondur (2.00 / 2) #1 Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 10:22:31 AM EST
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you as well.

I am unsure that the supposition that making a declaratory statement of personal belief automatically causes someone else to be judged.  If the intent isn't to judge, then it is up to the listener to have some thicker skin.  When someone says to me "I believe in God" its up to my own ego to not mentally follow it up with "and you are a Godless atheist heathen". 

While I certainly understand your point, and the JR thing is correct, we will cease to have meaningful dialog if we don't take it upon ourselves not to be offended by every little thing.


"I love my brain. It's the only organ I can afford to lose." --frijolito
I wasn't offended by riceowlguy (4.00 / 1) #3 Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 10:48:24 AM EST
I'm not implying that people should not state opinions for fear of offending other people.  I just think that the average "I'm not judging you" statement is false.  Generally, however, it's a harmless falsehood, born of our need to get along with other people.

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gifts by StackyMcRacky (4.00 / 2) #2 Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 10:31:34 AM EST
many years ago, my family instituted a $10 limit on all gifts.  it actually makes gift-giving fun - you have to be creative.

merry christmas, friend... by clock (4.00 / 1) #4 Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 03:30:44 PM EST
...and happy new year!

we should get together for good coffay sometime.

I agree with clock entirely --Kellnerin

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