Print Story I didn't do breakfast, either. NO SHAVE NOVEMBER.
Help!
By gzt (Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 07:38:10 AM EST) gzt, it will only end in tears, guns, friggin' intense, no shave november (all tags)
Am I turning into MNS? Finally?

It's a lot better than turning into NFB's Zippy, at least.

My roommate got a gun and ammo catalog in the mail the other day. I noticed that there were some pretty good deals.

So, 10 instead of 5, per the last diary.



Crap, I am turning into MNS. Or maybe I'm just becoming awesome, and awesome just happens to have a lot of things in common with MNS.

Was at gym yesterday, ran into Woman, who was on the treadmills, so instead of warming up using the rower, which was right next to her, I went straight to the weight room and warmed up there. Anyways: it all worked. There's always this one guy in there when I go, he does curls, calf raises, and other fairly worthless exercises when I'm in there. Fortunately, there are other people around doing worthwhile stuff, like power cleans.

The blood pressure machine at work has been out for a while. The power in the building was out one morning and the machine hasn't been on since. I poked around and couldn't see why it wasn't on. Dammit! There's just something about numbers. It gives me three of them. Over time, that's a lot of numbers. I like numbers.

When I learned how to read, I would read upside-down, vertically in both directions, whatever. It was madness (IT WAS SPAARTAAAA). When in public, my mother would be like, put that book right-side-up, people will look at you funny. I've slowed down since then. Or maybe regular reading sped up and I never bothered practicing it.

Hey, the machine's working again. Tested. Hrm. It varies very widely when I test it on multiple occasions, as does the resting pulse it reports.

Teleconference! Woo, executive board blah blah blah.

Hmm: elbow slightly sore.

Well, I may as well post this.

IT WILL ONLY END IN TEARS.

< Kids. . . | In memory of things we must not forget. >
I didn't do breakfast, either. NO SHAVE NOVEMBER. | 11 comments (11 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Good work on avoiding Woman by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #1 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 07:42:17 AM EST
it only takes one moment of weakness, though.

Can you even keep a gun in Chicago?


No. I don't even think you can get ammo. by gzt (2.00 / 0) #4 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:20:22 AM EST
I could just have it sent to my parents' house.

[ Parent ]
Think Dukes of Hazard by georgeha (2.00 / 0) #5 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:24:43 AM EST
can you get a compound bow, or a crossbow? Maybe a big slingshot, or an atlatl.

What good is an armory at your parents, when the Obamatroopers come you need something you can grab in two minutes.


[ Parent ]
That's true. by gzt (2.00 / 0) #6 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:28:36 AM EST
The center of the Obamanation is, after all, less than a mile from my place. Close enough that my friggin' traffic was obstructed on election day. Parentlandia, on the other hand, is a four hour drive if traffic isn't too bad.

[ Parent ]
Suspect that a few of them are banned. by wumpus (2.00 / 0) #10 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 02:25:23 PM EST
Crossbows are easily as restricted as handguns in MD (I know that you have to register them), and can only be used for hunting by the handicapped.  I'm not sure why the restricted it: was it because they are silent, (soft body)armor penetrating, or because they have no muzzle flash?  On the other hand, they have  lousy range and rate of fire.

Wumpus



[ Parent ]
Lousy range? by lm (2.00 / 0) #11 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 03:39:36 PM EST
Compared to a .30-06 with a nice scope, yeah, crossbows have lousy range. But they're fine for fifty yards or so which borders on the range within which handguns are accurate. Hand guns do shoot further but good luck hitting something much further out than that outside of some extremely unusual circumstances.

Admittedly, they do have a lousy rate of fire.


There is no more degenerate kind of state than that in which the richest are supposed to be the best.
Cicero, The Republic
[ Parent ]
BP cuffs are cheap by ad hoc (2.00 / 0) #2 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:00:12 AM EST
Get one for yourself, then you can get numbers ANY TIME YOU WANT!

--
The three things that make a diamond also make a waffle.
I had to look up what those were by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #3 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:07:49 AM EST

As I was thinking they would be something like these,which would, indeed, allow you to "get numbers any time you want", though admittedly not the sort of numbers you'd necessarily want, and besides, why would you need their number if you had them secured already, anyway?

I'll be over here, if anyone needs me. Sending covert cell signals to Operation Spread the Awesomeness, as we further assemble our mid-coastal operations team. Er, teams.


-
You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
that would only end in tears. by gzt (2.00 / 0) #7 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 08:33:45 AM EST
I have advanced far beyond that point, but I guess I'll remember this in case I regress.

[ Parent ]
As much fun as those might be by ad hoc (2.00 / 0) #8 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 10:18:45 AM EST
I was thinking more along these lines.

But I like your idea better.

--
The three things that make a diamond also make a waffle.
[ Parent ]
I should learn that by ucblockhead (2.00 / 0) #9 Fri Nov 07, 2008 at 11:37:18 AM EST
Just for the amusement value of reading on the train upside down.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
I didn't do breakfast, either. NO SHAVE NOVEMBER. | 11 comments (11 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback