Print Story A sequence of facts for your edification
Fishies
By MohammedNiyalSayeed (Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 02:25:48 PM EST) (all tags)

They may or may not be in any cohesive order.



Taking Over Japan

Apparently it will require more than one facebook advertisement. 17,924 impressions netted a whopping 10 clicks, total. Total failure if considered an effort to actually move product, but check this rationalization out: I'm building a fucking brand here, people! A BRAND! Whatever; the whole campaign only cost me 1.39 USD, which is like 25 Yen or something.

Plus, I still need to talk to an old Intarweb Enemy from USENET days, now that he's like "Lord of Bookin' Weird US Bands In Japan and Havin' Japanese Hipsters Actually Show Up At Those Shows 'N Shit". Timing == Everything.

Speaking of which...

Timing == Everything

Timing can apparently change. Either that, or waiting changes shit. I don't pretend to understand how any of this stuff works. Also, it is true: I-280 is a much prettier drive than 101, depending on circumstances.

Sunday Morning Playlist

  1. In the Garden - Fred Lowery
  2. Air Aid - Menomena
  3. The Penalty - Beirut
  4. Don't Fence Me In - Crosby, Bing
  5. somebody - aaliyah vs. djginsu
  6. Protected From The Rain - Grandaddy
  7. Simply Beautiful - Al Green
  8. Three Little Birds - Bob Marley and The Wailers
  9. Randy Costanza - Solex
  10. That Time - Regina Spektor
  11. Elephant Gun - Beirut
  12. Nice Work If You Can Get It - Billie Holiday

I bolded the one I'm on now. Hopefully, this motherfucker will be posted by the time we get to "Nice Work If You Can Get It". Fascinating meta-shit, eh? Oh, you know you love it.

Fuck.

I know more than I want to know. I guess I'm glad I know, but it puts me in a forced choice situation, which I would have preferred to have avoided. Oh well, I would prefer to have a pony, as well, and I'm not getting that, either. Ignorance, in this case, may not be bliss, but it's a fuckload simpler.

Facts To Distract

Here are some facts for you to memorize:

  • Duboce Park was named after someone. Precisely who doesn't really matter.
  • Sometimes sequences of coincidences are mistaken for fate by those wanting to see such things in that way. And sometimes other people, as well. Fact! I have spoken it! Behold!
  • Matt Pond PA bores the living shit out of me. Unfortunately, iTunes seems to want to rub a whole bunch of it up on me. Next!
  • Sliced pear + stilton cheese + bread = delicious.
  • Homeless people are less likely to bother you if the first thing you say to them is "I'm working".
  • I just coughed up goo. Right now. 10:58am. It was pretty gross. AGAIN: CERTIFIABLE FACT.
  • As many facts as I list, I'm still thinking about one thing.
  • Squonk's cover of Kashmir is at least twice as good as the original.
  • I foresee skiing in my future. Probably awful skiing, but skiing, regardless.

I Wonder About New Orleans

And just how much wreckage there is to see if one wanted to go see wreckage. If only there were an electronic method to investigate, perhaps a network of resources or something. Oh fucking well.

Perspective

Somewhere, right now, someone is bleeding to death. Someone is choking on their own vomit, and someone is drowning. I have none of these problems. Things can always be much, much worse.

One More Thing

Got to totally shut down a "videoblogger"'s "videoblogcast" outside of DonutWorld on Friday at closing time by having a gigantic Ford F650 box truck back up slowly (complete with unbearably loud backup siren) right into their entire field of vision. Just for fun. Fuck you, videobloggers! The security dudes found the whole thing endlessly amusing, as they'd wanted to kick the whole blog posse off the front walkway for some time, but didn't want to cause a "crackdown by Donut Police" videoblog drama. Life is complicated these days; basic rudeness will still solve a number of these complicated problems. It is easier, after all, to beg forgiveness than it is to ask permission.

Guess what song just started playing? NICE FUCKING WORK IF YOU CAN FUCKING GET IT, FUCKERS! Postin' time. And more coffee time. And possibly poopin' time, round deux. Who knows? Can't imagine what I'd shit...

< Good, Eventful And Crap | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
A sequence of facts for your edification | 15 comments (15 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
New Orleans: pretty fucked up. by blixco (4.00 / 1) #1 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 03:50:26 PM EST
Not as bad as some war ravaged locations.  But not much better.

The soupy stuff that hasn't evaporated in years, that sits in the sinks and tubs and washrooms of once flooded houses?  That stuff apparently has an odor that you can't forget.
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"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin


It's mainly the wreckage of buildings by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #7 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:24:12 PM EST

I want to take pictures of, as I doubt anyone will let me in to do interior shots, but good to know. It also looks like the crime rate is right about where it was prior to Katrina. That's the New Orleans I know and love...


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

You can get into buildings, by blixco (4.00 / 1) #11 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:51:11 PM EST
in most cases the owners are nowhere nearby, the neighbors don't care...in fact, not many people do.
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"You bring the weasel, I'll bring the whiskey." - kellnerin
[ Parent ]

brandbuilding by ucblockhead (4.00 / 1) #2 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 03:54:45 PM EST
If you gave me a free band t-shirt, it might get worn in Japan.
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ウセーバラケダ


This will be done. by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #6 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:22:59 PM EST

I need new t-shirts, first, though.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

Dude, just go make pseudo-peace with Violet. by ammoniacal (4.00 / 1) #3 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 04:39:57 PM EST
Think of the angry sex with that hot piece of ass.

Irony: ammo says it's time. Tom is blocked.


Not *that* blogger by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #5 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:22:34 PM EST

And not if she was the last junk-touched piece of saggy, pasty ass on this planet.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

I didn't notice the sagging and pasting. by ammoniacal (4.00 / 1) #9 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:28:17 PM EST
I'll look again. They may be where I lost my keys.
In the mean-time, look at it this way-- She's easier than learning Wapanese.

Irony: ammo says it's time. Tom is blocked.
[ Parent ]

Easier, yes. by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #10 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:30:19 PM EST

Also significantly worth less. With or without the space in between "worth" and "less".


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

Okay, but at least she has nice eyes. by ammoniacal (4.00 / 1) #12 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 07:00:25 PM EST
C'mon, you can cop to that much, can't ya? lulz

Irony: ammo says it's time. Tom is blocked.
[ Parent ]

I prefer eyes on the front of the face by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 1) #13 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 07:03:54 PM EST

As opposed to ON THE FRIGGIN' SIDE LIKE FISH, but hey, to each their own.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

predator/prey by sasquatchan (4.00 / 2) #14 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 08:32:12 PM EST
prey has eyes on the side to see all around for the incoming predator(s). Predators have front facing eyes to see/track/attack prey better. Or at least that's some fact I remember from bio 101/evolution.

[ Parent ]

video blogger ? by sasquatchan (4.00 / 1) #4 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 05:20:34 PM EST
it wasn't one accusing you of stalking or, more generally, being a mean nasty poo-poo head towards him/her/it (jury's still out on proper pronoun usage) ?



No, no, this one has no idea who I am by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #8 Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 06:24:46 PM EST

Fear not.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]

I hear drowning is pretty euphoric. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #15 Mon Jan 21, 2008 at 01:46:10 PM EST
At least, that's what that article on ways to die told me. First you panic a bit, then, once the water gets in your lungs, you get all happy-go-lucky 'cause, like, once your lungs are filled with water you pretty much don't give a fuck 'bout nothing else. So, like, when you decide to go, that could be one enjoyable way out, provided you get past the panic stage.

For some reason, I see your album being a big hit in Japan eventually. It's just weird enough to make it over there. Though it could do with a few more references to tentacle rape, I still think you're fringing on the strange enough to make a big splash, provided at least one of those teenaged girls hits the buy button.

And screw iTunes and it's retarded associations. No, I don't think me listening to Testament means I want to buy POD, fuckers.



A sequence of facts for your edification | 15 comments (15 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback