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Diary
By Scrymarch (Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 02:26:10 PM EST) WFC, WFC5 (all tags)
WFC5 recap, Fusion.


When travelling, B and I have often played a version of this game, but it wasn't the confrontational style in the story, and in more casual settings. It was more like: "What's that?" "Dunno" "Is that the word for fish?" "Cool".

The idea came from the wikipedia page for Pun. It informed me that the archaic form was Pundigrion, and so Mr Pundigrion, the unacknowledged diner, was born. Somehow that melded with the game.

It was too short, in the sense that it was cheatingly under the word limit. In another sense, I felt I couldn't add anything to it. I could have spun out the middle for another paragraph or two, but it would have slowed the pace too much for my liking. The whole scene was sitcom enough as it was.

On the other hand, some people missed the mechanics - Jeb wanted to eat, his friends were just punishing him for being a smartarse. Probably solvable with more words.

It was a bit much calling my own story funny in the reviews, but too much negativity just would have been obvious.

I actually tried to write an ending this time. Honest. Next time I'm just having the police take people away, as in Monty Python.

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Confusion | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
funny by Kellnerin (4.00 / 1) #1 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 03:14:34 PM EST
but it wasn't until shortly after I'd posted my review agreeing with your review of "Fusion" that I solidified my suspicion that it was yours, but when I came to that conclusion, a bunch of things suddenly made sense. It was a good stealth review, and basically accurate.

Over the weekend, talking with the combined Boston/Toronto gang after having seen Pan's Labyrinth, toxicfur mentioned a story by Kelly Link that she liked, but I was only so-so on. "It wasn't a bad story," I said, "but the ending was kind of ... Scrymarchian?"

"There's a reference not many people will get," iGrrrl commented.

However, this ending worked for this story, as I said elsewhere, without being overdone. Mr. Pundigrion was a bit overacknowledged for being consciously unacknowledged, if you see what I mean, though. I would have bought "Fusion" ("Does that mean it explodes?") as the pun. And while I can understand the game "in the wild," as it were, I couldn't picture a restaurant such as the one in the story, being so intentionally obtuse and, er, Jeb-like.

--
"If a tree is impetuous in the woods, does it make a sound?" -- aethucyn

My life as an obsessively underplayed denoument by Scrymarch (2.00 / 0) #3 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 03:49:19 PM EST
The restaurant was supposed to be a caricature much like the one in Review, though I fortunately didn't see it until submitting. Maybe I could have thought of some other details about the restaurant to make it more ridiculous. Then it would have been the exploration of an idea, rather than just the presentation of one.

There was at one point a restaurant in London, which I sadly have never been to, where one is served entirely in the dark, in order to allow the diner to focus on the taste of the food, and sympathise with the plight of the differently abled. So there is some market for consciously perverse dining.

The Political Science Department of the University of Woolloomooloo

[ Parent ]
caricature by Kellnerin (2.00 / 0) #5 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 04:20:08 PM EST
I got that vibe, but "The Review" was caricaturing both the restaurant and the form of the review itself -- it's hard to tell which side is the more ridiculous one (if it even matters). In "Fusion," though, there's more of a disconnect. I could buy that the restaurant was a sort of ludicrously international pan-fusion as opposed to a this-hyphen-that place in particular, but it was the lack of description of the dishes that didn't ring true.

Also, something about the line "Jeb had, of course, chosen a venue that provided no explanations for its dishes." -- though it doesn't say it, seems to suggest that this place was not unique in its "marketing by obscurity." If it'd been "Of course, the venue Jeb had chosen provided no explanations for its dishes," it'd have shifted me just a little closer to credibility. Or if Jeb's friends had said, "WTF with all the mystery food in this place?" giving Jeb the opportunity to spout whatever manifesto was behind it all, rather than just accepting it like oh, it's one of those places. It just seemed that the restaurant was custom-made for Jeb and people who are self-satisfied in the exact same way, which seems like a pretty small market.

Now I am overanalyzing something I only gave you a week to produce. As such, it was a neat sketch.

--
"If a tree is impetuous in the woods, does it make a sound?" -- aethucyn

[ Parent ]
Ah, interesting by Scrymarch (4.00 / 1) #6 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 04:35:55 PM EST
Thanks.

giving Jeb the opportunity to spout

I'm already too given to declamation, don't tempt me or my next might end up as some sort of horrific manifesto terzanelle.

Workers of the world unite
You have nothing to lose but your chains
The revolution is nigh.

The history of all society
Has been the history of class struggle
You have nothing to lose but your chains
...



The Political Science Department of the University of Woolloomooloo

[ Parent ]
Fusion was solid stuff. by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 1) #2 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 03:48:58 PM EST
The story I started to write, but couldn't make a go of was a sort of "Fusion"/"Review" thing. I couldn't make it work. But you did. Color me impressed.

Hey, cheers by Scrymarch (2.00 / 0) #4 Fri Feb 02, 2007 at 03:52:51 PM EST
See also mutual admiration posted in your own recap.

The Political Science Department of the University of Woolloomooloo

[ Parent ]
Confusion | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback