I

“Phänomen”

Wenn zu der Regenwand
Phöbus sich gattet,
Gleich steht ein Bogenrand
Farbig beschattet.

Im Nebel gleichen Kreis
Seh ich gezogen,
Zwar ist der Bogen weiß,
Doch Himmelsbogen.

So sollst du, muntrer Greis,
Dich nicht betrüben,
Sind gleich die Haare weiß,
Doch wirst du lieben.

—By Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

II

I might as well call the GPotD the Goethe Poem of the Day at this point, though that will change in the not too distant future. I'm having fun reading through the West-östlicher Divan poem-by-poem, and (after all) it's really all about me.

This one is brief, three short stanzas, with no reference to Hafiz, to poetry, to song or drink, or to the other things common to the preceding poems, though like a few of the others it establishes an analogy by way of extended metaphors ... nothing out of the ordinary, though. The middle verses of the first two stanzas show a repetition that is not seen in the German (the Rain and Rainbow in the first, and Likewise and Likewise in the second). In the German the second and third stanzas repeat “weiß” (white), but in a different order than in the English, where Whaley moves the “white” to the verse about the circle rather than the bow. His second use of “Likewise” is supposed to parallel Goethe's rhetorical drive using “Zwar” and “Doch” I suspect, but it falls rather short of the mark. I get the feeling that Whaley attempted to be more “poetic” with his translation here, and the result seems to map to the original content only with difficulty. Quite a number of references have their appearances in verse rearranged (second to first line for Phöbus/Phoebus).

An alternate/second translation that I found is more literal though clunkier than Whaley's:

“Phenomenon”

When Phoebus is joined
With the wall of rain,
Instantly a bow appears
Colourfully shaded.

In the clouds I see
An identical circle drawn,
Though the bow is white:
Yes, heaven's bow.

Do not worry,
Cheerful old man;
Though your hair is white,
You will still love.

—Translated by Siân Goldthorpe & Christian Stein

I wish Whaley had been more literal in his second stanza, though his use of “mist” is far preferable to Goldthorpe and Stein's “clouds.” Then again, Goldthorpe and Stein's translation doesn't even attempt poetic fidelity; there's not a trace of rhyme in it, nor a concern for meter.

With the aid of Goethe's shorter verses Whaley more easily follows the original's meter this time around. The alternation in the German and in the English is rather precise between six and five syllable lines. In the German the six syllable verses end on long vowels (unstressed in the first stanza, stressed in the second and third); the five syllable lines end without exception on unstressed verb endings. Goethe's long lines all end with nouns or adjectives; Whaley does not follow this in the first stanza but he does in the second two, and in addition all his short lines end with verbs that, like Goethe's, have endings. These endings in both languages might be called “weak,” but they they help add pauses.

The actual stress patterns don't quite match up very well between the two—though a thoroughly artificial reading of them might manage it—but I still appreciate Whaley's attempt. The overlap between the second and third stanzas in terms of language—white/weiß—is carried over in the formal realm, where the meters match precisely (whereas the first stanza has peculiarities, such as unstressed final syllables in the first and third verses).

In other non-news it appears that my university library has a significant, if not complete, collection of the Left Behind books. I shall resist the temptation.

I am reminded—for no good reason—of a link ni provided yesterday: Retro-Histo: making an image fit your histogram! Or rather: making an image it its own histogram.

Stephanie Zacharek says that the movie Control “is one of the most beautiful movies ever made about rock 'n' roll.” Am I the only one who never really got into movies about music (Christopher Guest movies aside) and musicians?

III

“Phenomenon”

Phoebus on high receives
Rain cloud's embraces,
Rainbow enshadowed weaves
Colourful traces.

Mist shows a circle white,
Likewise compounded,
Likewise with bow of light
Heaven is rounded.

Gloom need not cloud your sight
Though age increases:
What though your hair be white,
Love never ceases.

—Translated by John Whaley