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Wizards and Hobbits
By Bob Abooey (Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 05:34:35 AM EST) All this and much much more!! (all tags)
The B.A.D.TM

The Blog Vladimir Putin doesn't want you to know about...



Yes, Hello.

Have you had a look at the calender? Yep, it's Friday, we made it! Well, assuming nobody gets taken out by a bus yet today. Getting run over then dragged along stuck to the undercarriage of the bus as your bleeding body gets mangled beyond all recognition, leaving body shrapnel spewed all over Main street until the bus driver stops the bus and hears the people waiting at the bus stop shriek and scream in terror when they gaze upon the bloody stump that was once your body.

Let's assume the odds of that happening are slim and we can thusly state with confidence that we have indeed made it to the end of another "working" week. Okay, come to think of it, that's assuming you're not actually working over the weekend, or you don't live in Iceland where it's actually Monday morning right now. If that's the case go ahead and skip down to the next paragraph.

Today I'm listening to a tape1 on setting goals. Good stuff, makes a lot of sense. In fact the first goal that I wrote down is to set some goals. There it is, in black and white. See, that's what's called a short term goal. You're supposed to make a bunch of long term goals then break them down into a bunch of short term goals then, well, you achieve them. So it's like this: Set long term goals -> set short term goals -> Achieve goals -> marry Super Model and make millions -> QED. Pretty simple, eh? Seems so but it takes this guy about 4 hours to get through it all.

Speaking of tapes1 I was kinda fooling around with making a funky version of Oya Comma Va but lost interest in it, so I'm tossing it out for the unwashed masses. It's only the intro and the main verse part, which, truth be told, is most of the song. Here ya go: Oh Yeah Coma Va. I don't know, I might go back and finish it sometime, maybe hack a funky Latino type solo in there, but probably not.

One thing I know for sure that I will finish is today's lunch. Yep. I have plans on visiting the local Sub shop for a giant vat of rigatoni, with a side salad (French on the salad) and a toasted garlic roll. MMMMMmmmmmmmmm. I don't know what you cretins are going to be eating but rest assured it won't be as good as my lunch.

Right. I'm gonna hit submit then get back to work. Well, mostly get back to work.

[1] - Tape == mp3.

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...the REST of the story by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 1) #1 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 05:45:54 AM EST
Long term goal: Incredible fame and a reasonable amount of fortune.
Short term goal: Get some loooosers to give me money for advice on how to achieve their goals.
Shorter term goal: Get tape1 recorder and a bunch of blank tapes1.

1 Tape == mp3

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That's why my friend steals them for me.. by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #2 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 05:52:34 AM EST
That reminds me of one of those late night info-mercials I used to watch.

This guy basically sells you crap that teaches you how to make up stuff to sell to people, which is exactly what he's doing. So you write a book on how to make money which tells you to write a book on how to make money and sell it. QED. The circle completes itself!

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
I certainly didn't mean to imply by DesiredUsername (2.00 / 0) #4 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 06:08:33 AM EST
that Bob Abooey, Internet Superhero with the Ass of Gold, was an internet looooooser!

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[ Parent ]
I wonder by theantix (2.00 / 0) #12 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 09:16:12 AM EST
What % of the spam I get in my inbox is based on that very same principle?

I sometimes suspect that the only kind of spam that actually works is the kind that tries to convince people to become spammers themselves -- and that the whole "industry" is just a black hole where the only thing actually being purchased is spam creation software.

Okay, I admit that I sometimes suspect this only to prevent me from hating the human race even more than I do now.  If people actually bought stuff from a VnIAGnRA email, I'm not sure how I could go on.
____________________________________
Everything you wanted to know about Kansas City, and more.

[ Parent ]
Sadly by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #13 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 09:58:21 AM EST
I read somewhere that something like .0005% (number made up, but it's a small number) of the people who get spams actually buy crap, which means if you send out 10 billion spams you'll make some money on it.

So yeah, the reason spam goes on and on is because some idiots out there actually buy crap. We only have ourselves to blame.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
Don't tell me these things! by theantix (2.00 / 0) #14 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 11:57:52 AM EST
Ignorance is bliss.

Hmmm... or perhaps we just need a new official species so we can distinguish fine upstanding people like you and me from the people who buy stuff from spam.  Homo Detritus, perhaps?
____________________________________
Everything you wanted to know about Kansas City, and more.

[ Parent ]
You will be needing an awful lot of blank mp3s by herbert (4.00 / 1) #6 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 07:01:14 AM EST
I can supply these at very reasonable prices.  I can send them on CDs or you can opt to download them and save the postage.  Please contact me for a quote.

[ Parent ]
The intro is pants -- except for the gourd by greyrat (2.00 / 0) #3 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 06:02:00 AM EST
The rest of it actually sounds pretty nice. You need to get clean up the flattened notes and pick up the tempo, but it's a nice mix.

Thanks by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #5 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 06:13:35 AM EST
I dig the gourd, no need to be a gourd hata.

The tempo is dictated in this case by my ability to move back and forth from the m7 to the 7th chord.

What flattened notes are you speaking of? Except for the little run at the end it's pretty much the actual transcription (notes wise) from the original recording.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
Right now by paperdoll (2.00 / 0) #7 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 07:40:50 AM EST
I don't think I'd mind being drug by a bus, it sure beats my current assignment.  Maybe I need motivational tapes?

Long term goal 1. stop wishing to be drug by bus
               2. stop checking site every few minutes to avoid actual redoing of work
               3. find bus

That's a good start by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #10 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 08:24:08 AM EST
Except I left out a few details about the goals.

See, you're supposed to set concrete specific goals, with dates and times. That's key.

Otherwise if your goal is to simply "get run over by a bus and die a horrible agonisingly painful death whilst traumatising every child who happens to see my bloody corpse dragging under the bus thusly causing them to all be forced to go to therapy for most of their adult lives to overcome their fear of intimacy and commitment stemming from watching that horrific tragedy" well, you could put if off forever. Yo need to define a time, like 5:00 P.M. Sunday evening, or something like that.

Buy yeah, if I were you I'd try the motivational tapes angle first, if that doesn't work out you can still lob yourself under the bus. Maybe use that as your contingency plan.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
The by paperdoll (2.00 / 0) #11 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 08:38:32 AM EST
time thing was involved with goal #3 find bus.  Now your going to push me into looking up a bus schedule.  Screw it to much trouble.
New goals
1. 6:15 pm next Tuesday clean out van
well that's pretty much it

[ Parent ]
So bob, by sasquatchan (2.00 / 0) #8 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 07:42:05 AM EST
which organization provided you with said tapes ? I hope it isn't Amway, CoS, or others of such ilk. I fear for your soul, my man. Dangerous stuff in those  tapes..

No no.. this is quality stuff by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #9 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 07:55:54 AM EST
My friend is providing them to me and I think he's stealing sharing them off the double top secret underground Internets P2P network.

This is the bloke. Nothing dangerous here at all.

NOW MAKE IT A GREAT DAY!!!

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
bob, baby by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #15 Fri Jul 21, 2006 at 07:45:08 PM EST
your tribute picture has been posted.
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Dance On, Gir!
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