Print Story ATTENTION CYCLING IDI^H^HNFIDELS
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By BadDoggie (Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 04:59:40 AM EST) cycling, people do this for FUN?!, L. Armstrong is a weenie (all tags)
I found a mapping Web site for Munich which provides full directions from and to any point in the city and realised that my office is a lot closer to home than I thought.

The last time I used two wheels for transportation without the assistance of at least 700cc of quality engineering was some 25 years ago.

There's no way in hell I was going to try it on a work day without confirming the route ahead of time.



About 6km later my fucking legs hurt like Blixco's back and joh3n's wife's crack. OW!

BG was surprised that I would consider going for a bike ride and came along. She loves that sort of shit. I printed out the directions and then promptly ignored them.

The first kilometer sucked pretty bad, there being no cover from the sun. The second kilometer sucked even more because that's where the uphill and downhill started and my legs were really hurting. Then came the third kilometer and while it was relatively flat, it still sucked because my legs really hurt.

The fourth kilometer sucked and that's where we screwed up the directions, the road we were following having turned into a highway and we having veered off to the wrong side although we could see a landmark building. That led to the fifth serious suckage kilometer during which we dead-ended into an abandoned train station stradling abandoned tracks. From the platform I could see my building but there were construction fences and broken glass and piles of rocks and razor wire and probably a lot of landmines in between so we had to backtrack.

The sixth kilometer turned out not to be the absolute suckiest but since it was again out in the open with the sun beating down on my jeans-clad legs and black T-shirted torso, it sucked.

The Panopticon is a greenhouse. With all the windows and doors shut the fucking building was up to 40°. It cooled a bit after I opened some windows in my wing and we killed a big-ass bottle of water.

We're on our way back home now. Neither of us looked at the clock on the way out so I don't know how much time this cycling shit is supposed to have saved me. Supposedly this is good for you and you can lose weight. For this kind of effort I damned well better be burning up at least an extra 8,000 calories or so each way.

Addendum:
The office has no shower. There's a shower that the kitchen has by law and which they don't use, but they won't let us use it because it's theirs. Seriously.

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ATTENTION CYCLING IDI^H^HNFIDELS | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Can you get some pictures of that train station? by Driusan (2.00 / 0) #1 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 05:31:52 AM EST
It sounds kinda neat.

6km isn't that far, unless you haven't done any biking for a long time. 12 is a little, but on a work day you'll only be doing half of that at a time with 8 hours rest in between. If you do it every day, it should only take about a week before it seems bearable*. It'll seem a lot nicer during rush hour, when none of the cars are moving and you just bike right past them, pointing and laughing.

Take some water with you if it's that hot. Is there any way around the hills? If not, make sure you're using your gears and not just trying to pedal harder. They do make a difference.

* Note: all numbers and time frames pulled from my ass.

--
Vive le Montréal libre.

It only took 21 minutes by BadDoggie (2.00 / 0) #2 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 05:40:38 AM EST
Despite the lack of speed and heat and everything else I whinged about -- along with a legitimate problem of an unexpected detour again -- I got home in less time than the bus/subway takes even when I make both ideal connections. And I'm losing about 8,000 calories each time I do it, right?

I'm not giving up my public transportation annual pass: I bet this really sucks in the rain and snow.

woof.

OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

I've ridden all around Munich. by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #3 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 09:05:43 AM EST
Can't imagine your route being too strenuous, unless your start or end point is in Gruenewald. PROOF OR STFU

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

[ Parent ]
Read the intro by BadDoggie (4.00 / 1) #6 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 10:22:41 AM EST
25 years since using a bicycle as a major mode of transportation. There were a couple weeks in Regensburg back in '93 that I rode the entire kilometer between my home and the city centre but then my bike found a better home in Poland one night while I was working at the disco.

woof.

OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

[ Parent ]
Is this all north of the Isar? by ammoniacal (2.00 / 0) #10 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 01:06:24 PM EST
NORTH == TEH FL4TTZ0R5

"To this day that was the most bullshit caesar salad I have every experienced..." - triggerfinger

[ Parent ]
You were in too high a gear and by ambrosen (4.00 / 2) #4 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 09:05:48 AM EST
your saddle was too low. Your chain was rusty and your tyres were soft. That's why it was hard.

Still, a little weird calling people idiots because they have more control over their bodies than you do.

Not quite as weird by yicky yacky (2.00 / 0) #5 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 10:09:10 AM EST

as cutting their car tyres' valve stems as hint that they should move their car ...


----
Vacuity abhors a vacuum.
[ Parent ]
That's next time by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #9 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 12:28:21 PM EST
This time he just sharpied the license plates to spell "C0P5 R F4G5".

-
Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
Nope. by BadDoggie (2.00 / 0) #7 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 10:26:59 AM EST
Changed gears accordingly, saddle is too close to handlebars (need a bigger bike, I think), chain is clean and tyres full. It was hard because despite running the bar alone and the mileage I get on foot, I'm not really in terribly good shape. This might change since riding today alone was at least 15 minutes better than my average public transport commute and the weather tomorrow is supposed to be good.

And yicky yacky, identify yourself. Slashing the tyres is a perfectly acceptable way of letting someone know that double parking and blocking me is a Bad Idea.

woof.

OMG WE'RE FUCKED! -- duxup ?

[ Parent ]
Good job. by miker2 (2.00 / 0) #8 Sun Jul 16, 2006 at 10:32:15 AM EST
I read this still sweating from my 100K "taper" ride I just did....

You legs will hate you tomorrow, but after a couple of trips you'll be fine.  Make sure you have heavy duty tires and you shouldn't have to worry about flats.  Continental makes some good puncture resistant tires and they're make in Germany so they should be cheaper than here.

Stash some baby wipes and deoderant in your desk if they won't let you shower.  Or just walk around VERY stinky until they give in.


Ah, sociopathy. How warm, how comforting, thy sweet embrace. - MNS
ATTENTION CYCLING IDI^H^HNFIDELS | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback