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(Betriebs-) Rats.

It's time to sign the new contract with $MegaCorp. The problem is certain suckage in comparison with my $BigCorp contract, mainly concerning money. I'm taking a pay cut because the Works Council (Betriebsrat) made a decision concerning our pay: everybody coming in from $BigCorp should be handled in an equitable manner.

Communist fuckwits.

x-posted to the blog sans poll



Back in the $BigCorp days a few of our fuck-ups led by one with a vendetta and a current court case against the company tried to use German laws to force a Betriebsrat on us. The company had to pick up the full tab for all costs of their attempts to thwart managerial decisions and have a say in how things are handled.

The three clowns went about it in a Little Rascals manner, though much less organised and prepared. I killed their first called meeting within ten minutes by pointing out that they'd failed to provide translations for me which the law requires.

They got better and played a lot of games, wasting time and costing the company thousands. In the end we managed to kill it, and a good thing that was for me. German Works Councils don't give a damn about ability, merit or competency. Whether it's to do with cuts or pay raises, they only look at the la-di-da social impact and would in a heartbeat let single, expert-in-multiple-areas me go in order to keep Mr Incompetent employed based solely on his inability to stop impregnating his wife, especially if he'd worked for the company a single day longer than me.

Management can't do much about it. It's the law, and once there's a Council in place you can't get rid of it. I've yet to hear a single thing that a Betriebsrat does which isn't in some way related to the protection of the incompetent and lazy. They prevent companies from making hard business decisions which are in the interest of the company.

Ten percent of my income under the old contract was based on my performance and would be doled out in a lump sum a couple months into the new year after an appraisal. I actually managed to exceed 100% once and I never fell below 92%. There were others only getting 30-40%.

$MegaCorp doesn't do the 90-10 pay and I rather doubt that basing pay increases even partially on merit can make it past the Council. But how to deal with the $BigCorp salaries in a $MegaCorp world?

Just give everyone 100% of that 10% since that's the rate each person was ostensibly hired at?

No.

Give each person the average percentage received in merit-based pay over the past three years so that a hard worker would get the 90% he'd been getting and the fuck-up would get 40%?

No.

The Works Council decided that everyone should be treated equally: everyone gets the overall average which was paid out.

The results of this ostensibly "fair" decision mean the monkeys who busted their balls over the past few years take a pay cut while the lazy fuck-ups who managed not to get shitcanned got a raise.

Fuckwits.

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A Day in the Life | 17 comments (17 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Sounds like the worst aspects of a union by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #1 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:00:51 AM EST
complain too much and you'll be buried under an autobahn expansion.


Quite by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #8 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 04:04:33 AM EST
It's reminiscent of the UAW of the 1970s, except that it's not a union: it's a group within the company to which the company must answer, from which they must take direction, and against which they can do little. The group claims to represent employees but they only benefit the slackers.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
I wish, oh how I wish by Rogerborg (4.00 / 3) #12 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 05:05:22 AM EST
That just once, I'd see a company doing this:

Boss: We're setting up a taskforce to investigate waste.  There are effectively no deliverables and you'll be unsupervised.  Who's got time to work on that?
Slackers: Ooh, ooh, me, sir, pick me!
Boss: Excellent.  You're all fired, and your little slacker dogs too.

How I wish.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

[ Parent ]
Don't those Betriebsrat idiots realize? by DesiredUsername (2.83 / 6) #2 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:06:32 AM EST
Work will set them free

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Laughing at Nazi death camps by hulver (2.00 / 0) #3 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:11:57 AM EST
Stopped being funny about 40 years ago.
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Cheese is not a hat. - clock
[ Parent ]
Actually, it was meant in irony by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 1) #4 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:17:35 AM EST
Calling them "la-di-da" social issues doesn't really prove that "hard business decisions" are inherently the most important thing in the world. Who is in charge here, human beings or corporations?

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Now accepting suggestions for a new sigline
[ Parent ]
Collective thinking isnt supposed to quash by cam (2.00 / 0) #5 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:26:56 AM EST
individual achievement or merit though. Equality is about power relationships, not merit. A meritocracy and technocracy are inherently unequal in skills, but not necessarily when it comes to power relationships. From baddoggies writing it sounds like the local council doesnt understand that.

cam
Freedom, liberty, equity and an Australian Republic

[ Parent ]
Well clearly by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 3) #6 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 03:44:18 AM EST
It was just the "la-di-da" that got under my skin. Complaining that all they care about is family status with no thought given to merit is valid because after all people are not interchangeable. Implying that family status is totally irrelevant is just as dumb, though, because how many man-hours of quality work are extracted from a person isn't their only worth, even to the company.

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Now accepting suggestions for a new sigline
[ Parent ]
Yuo Succeeded It by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #9 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 04:11:02 AM EST
Although the idea behind a Betriebsrat certainly seems to be a method of balancing the power relationship and protecting workers, Councils inevitably nix merit-based considerations.

How many sprogs my cow-orker has in no way changes his relative worth to the company, yet where a Betriebsrat exists, such an irrelevant factor is taken into consideration.

To further illustrate this, allow me to point out that even if I had €50K in debt hanging over me and said cow-orker had half a million in the bank and a working wife, I'd still be let go because "a father needs to be able to work so he can provide for his family". Seriously.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
Well, stop fighting the system by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #13 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 05:09:44 AM EST
And get spawning pups, you chump.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
Relations by ucblockhead (4.00 / 2) #15 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 05:19:06 AM EST
Clearly you need to tell them about me and my siblings, Dad.
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[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
[ Parent ]
so remind me by martingale (4.00 / 1) #7 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 04:00:50 AM EST
why the company is unhappy about paying less?

I guess it's time to find other perks to top up the difference.
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$E(X_t|F_s) = X_s,\quad t > s$

It's paying the same. by ambrosen (4.00 / 2) #10 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 04:17:10 AM EST


[ Parent ]
oops by martingale (4.00 / 1) #11 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 04:18:30 AM EST
You're right, I didn't read the rant very carefully. Disregard.
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$E(X_t|F_s) = X_s,\quad t > s$
[ Parent ]
It shouldn't be by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #14 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 05:12:38 AM EST
I just spent an hour in an annual appraisal, the output from which is put into a shredder and has no bearing on the raise (or otherwise) which I'm getting this year.  Net result for the company: one lost hour of my time, and my line manager's.

REC's employer should be able to save the time it took to actually do the performance appraisals, although I rather suspect that they've also found ways to expand their non-work to fill the void.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

[ Parent ]
Hey by ambrosen (4.00 / 1) #16 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 05:43:57 AM EST
you're meant to be antagonistic to REC, not sympathetic.

[ Parent ]
Only when he's whinging about his job by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #17 Fri Jun 30, 2006 at 07:14:43 AM EST
Whinging about commie pseudo-Unions, that I can get right behind.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
A Day in the Life | 17 comments (17 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback