Print Story Oh Happy Day For Some...
Diary
By atreides (Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 09:15:40 AM EST) (all tags)
...and not so much for others.

Looks like JonBoy is, as of yesterday, officially divorced from the Russian Bride. Read to see the terms and circumstances of his victory.



To make a long drawn out story short, he has to give her $800 a month and half of his 401K ($5400ish). He gets custody of their son. Small price to pay...

Oprah and Dr. Phil would have been proud of the family's performance. His father testified about her drinking and how he reported her to Child Protective Services. His mother has decided to not only take care of the boy while JonBoy's at work, but to pay the $800 a month (she's going to do that by dipping into her savings and renting out her house and moving in with JonBoy). JonBoy's lawyer turned out to be a dud, but his mother's lawyer was a bulldog and decided that instead of painting both parents as unfit, she would bolster JonBoy's side. This worked out well because JonBoy's innate ability to see the exploitable hole in any system or argument worked well as he was feeding the Bulldog information and observations he noticed in the Russian Bride's testimony. He noticed an inconsistency, passed a note to the Bulldog and watch the exploit occur. Hell, they were even able to bring into evidence emails from the Russian Bride's mother and family in Russia supporting JonBoy. So the Judge found her to be an alcoholic and ruled in JonBoy's favor. She can have three supervised visits a week but no unsupervised ones until she goes through a 17 week parenting course, a 17 week alcohol course and, of course, quits drinking. If she can show that she can get her shit together, then the terms can be revised, but if that happens, it'll help JonBoy because the only reason he has to give her money is so that she's not completely destitute, especially with the other son and all. And if CPS looks in on her and finds her drunk or anything, they're gonna yank her son and probably give him to JonBoy, too. Which would be good because he's a good kid and doesn't need to be saddled with all this baggage.

All in all, in World Cup terms (the only thing you guys seem to care about :P), I rate this outcome Peru vs. Bolivia... JonBoy 4, Russian Bride 1.

On the other hand, I have another friend I don't talk about much. We'll call him Buddha. To sum up Buddha, he went to high school with Ben and JonBoy and I but went into the Navy for 8 years to escape his psychotic mother (seriously... His mom makes my mom seem pleasant). In that time he managed to father 3 children with 2 different women, one of whom he was married to, the other not. He has a bitter streak about women a mile wide, a passion for cars and computers that has us frequently invoking the term "rice-boy", a complete inability to manage or keep money, a strong taste for alcohol and loves both his daughters and his son to death. He has also, until about 6 months ago, never lived alone in his life. He got himself an apartment which, along with his car payment and bills, made for a hefty sum but he makes more money than any one of us so it shouldn't kill him. Strangely enough, he never had money for things like food or child support so he was always raiding people's fridges and liquor cabinets and borrowing money. In fact, when I was living alone and scraping by, everybody told me I should let Buddha room with me. I said NO every time. But I digress. About a month ago, he lost his job. Well, actually, he quit just before he was about to get fired. Just before that, his car got repossessed. A couple days ago, he left his apartment before they evicted him. Now here's the strange part... His mother, a woman more difficult than the most difficult woman in Christendom, gave him a car to drive and now, he's moving in with her just outside of Austin. Well, it seemed strange until yesterday. Apparently, she's sick. REALLY sick. It looks like maybe she's being nice to him to perhaps mend a few bridges before there's no more time left. His kids are coming to stay with them both for a few weeks. That'll give him more motivation to get a new job and it might be the last time they get to see her.

I rate this as Malta vs. Bulgaria... Buddha 1, Buddha's Mom 1.

As for me, well, Welsh Girl and I went to Shreveport this past weekend to visit her sister Party Girl and see her dad. It hasn't rained in a month, but the weekend we go on a trip, torrential downpour occurs and we have to drive in it. :( A 6-7 hour trip took 9 hours. The city was dreary. Party Girl's dog tried to molest me. All our plans were changed at the drop of a hat by the Girls. Party Girl's boyfriend wasn't all that interesting company because, well, he's 19 and what do I really have to talk to a 19-year-old about? I was too tired to stay up and watch a movie with them so I turned in early and had to get up early to go to Unitarian Church which is less a church and more an ethics colloquium. I made the mistake of speaking my mind while there (I'm relatively liberal and I tilt the politics of that crowd to the right) and had weird people trying to find out who to talk with me more and have lunches and stuff... :( We ended up getting off for home late so we didn't get back until ungodly in the morning which means I ended up skipping work, which was inconvenient, but not as inconvenient as the fact that I haven't been paid in weeks due to a minor snafu.

I rate this weekend like Slovakia vs. Spain... Atreides 1, The Weekend 5. Though, I did get to spend it with Welsh Girl so I guess it was more like Switzerland vs. Turkey... Atreides 2, The weekend 4.

And that, as they say in the funny papers, is that.

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Oh Happy Day For Some... | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden)
I hope it works for buddha. by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #1 Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 09:34:12 AM EST
And I'm glad you can work your life.

Sorry, but I have to say it by joh3n (4.00 / 1) #2 Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 09:57:40 AM EST
"JonBoy's innate ability to see the exploitable hole in any system or argument"

You mean like marrying Russian Girl?  Oh wait, I guess he missed that one.

----
I am a crime against humanity
-theantix

He see places to exploit... by atreides (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 10:15:16 AM EST
...not places he's being exploited. He's blind to that even when people point it out to him. Ain't it funny how one's merits often contain their flaws?

Have you seen The Passion yet? Here's a spoiler for you: Jesus dies.
"...compassion is more than a 16 point word in scrabble." - MostlyHarmless


[ Parent ]
indeed by joh3n (2.00 / 0) #4 Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 10:57:34 AM EST
and I'm just as guilty

----
I am a crime against humanity
-theantix

[ Parent ]
Sorry dude, but . . . by slozo (2.00 / 0) #5 Thu Jun 22, 2006 at 07:15:44 PM EST
. . . Bulgaria would KICK MALTA'S ASS.

revised score - Malta 0 Bulgaria 3

Sorry dude, but... by atreides (2.00 / 0) #6 Fri Jun 23, 2006 at 03:17:16 AM EST
...I call 'em as I see 'em.

Have you seen The Passion yet? Here's a spoiler for you: Jesus dies.
"...compassion is more than a 16 point word in scrabble." - MostlyHarmless


[ Parent ]
Oh Happy Day For Some... | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden)