Print Story A Day in the Life
Working life
By ReallyEvilCanine (Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 04:10:30 AM EST) A Day in the Life, cubicle, TANSTAAFL, USMC, pie (all tags)

As I returned from the bathroom, I asked, "Hey, Joe..."
"What's with all the shit in the hallway?" "Today is MegaLunch. Ve normally only heff MegaLunch once a munss but ziss time is to velcome all ze $BigCorp people."

From appearances, MegaLunch is plates of paprika-flavoured crisps and peanut M&Ms (yes, same plate) and various sorts of gummy/marshmallow-y candies. And empty plastic cups.

Up-and-coming meme poll (not available on bog spot)

Joe explained they usually order pizza and he mentioned beer. Of this I am certain. Mention beer and you've got my full attention, especially if it's free. We have border police to stop bad beer getting into Bavaria.

MegaLunch attendance, I found while trying my best to clear out a dozen tickets, was mandatory. MegaLunch was scheduled for 12:30; there were still 20 minutes to go.

There would be speeches and I had no means of escape.

When faced with no chairs and a long wait, I usually drop to parade rest which I find the most tolerable stance -- yet another thing I took with me from Boot Camp along with an ability to shine shoes to a mirror finish and fold hospital corners on sheets. The prattling on began.

The pizza arrived late. There was no beer. Joe will pay the minute he forgets to lock his computer and walks away. I can handle lukewarm pizza, congealed Chee-Zee brand processed cheese-like melted pizza topping and even limp and chewy pizza crust, but...

Attention German Pizza-making Infidels: Stop putting corn/maize/sweetcorn in everything! It most certainly does not belong on a fucking pizza. Everything else was fine: tomato slices, broccoli bits, red onions, mushrooms, some sort of pressed-ham-like stuff, even the feta cheese. But not the fucking corn!
So much for a free lunch. I'm off to find a beer. Dirka dirka Mohammed jihad.
< [Redacted] | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
A Day in the Life | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Dirka dirka Mohammed jihad by miker2 (4.00 / 3) #1 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 04:29:54 AM EST
I mutter that to myself when my coworkers start speaking in tongues to one another. They're not savages, but they're brown, which is close enough for me.

Ah, sociopathy. How warm, how comforting, thy sweet embrace. - MNS
Glad to see by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 04:46:35 AM EST
someone's upholding the use of English in the USA.

[ Parent ]
Racist comment (nt) by tps12 (2.00 / 2) #5 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 12:16:55 PM EST

[ Parent ]
No it's not. by miker2 (4.00 / 1) #6 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 12:53:34 PM EST
It's called a sense of humor.

Ah, sociopathy. How warm, how comforting, thy sweet embrace. - MNS
[ Parent ]
yeah by tps12 (2.00 / 0) #8 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 07:34:41 AM EST
A racist sense of humor.

[ Parent ]
I'm not racist by miker2 (2.00 / 0) #9 Thu Jun 15, 2006 at 08:20:29 AM EST
I just find the jokes hilarious.  Same with AIDS jokes, cancer jokes, and jokes about disasters and horrible crimes.  To me, they're all funny.

Ah, sociopathy. How warm, how comforting, thy sweet embrace. - MNS
[ Parent ]
considering by alprazolam (4.00 / 1) #7 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 01:11:28 PM EST
that I find myself muttering 'dirka dirka muhammad jihad' on occasion, I don't think you can say it's racist.

[ Parent ]
Reactionary white-guilt comment (nt) by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 04:51:02 PM EST

You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
link fairy by fleece (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 04:30:12 AM EST
Parade Rest

Yank or Commonwealth? by Rogerborg (2.00 / 0) #4 Wed Jun 14, 2006 at 05:34:37 AM EST
(Commonwealth) "the hands are placed behind the member with arms fully extended"

Ah, it's OK, I think I can guess.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.

A Day in the Life | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback