Print Story How Dark My Shadow's Grown
By Christopher Robin was Murdered (Thu May 04, 2006 at 04:50:35 AM EST) (all tags)
"The ache in my heart can only be expressed through this Boys II Men song."

Reading: Missed Connection

This is a very special edition of Thursday's traditional "Missed Connections." As regular readers (I know – I know – nobody is more shocked than I) know, I normally do a handful of these in a set. Today, we get one massive missed connection. Ignoring the unusual length, which in and of itself would be enough to distinguish it from the competition, the work is noteworthy for its creepy stalker interlude and the use, almost in its entirety, of the Boys II Men classic "End of the Road."

Ladies and gentlemen, a very special missed connections . . .

File Under: Holy. Crap.

Angela, my Angela


I know that we probably don’t belong together. But, I miss you so much. When you left me, my life stopped—my world stopped spinning. I’m so in love with you and I need you. Please take me back.

You know, Angela…I’ve been watching you lately. When you go to work. When you go to the store. When you come home at night. I’ve noticed that you haven’t “moved on with someone else” like you had said in that email you sent me in December. Don’t try to deny it, Angela. I have pictures.

[CRwM's Note: In the original, two long distance photos – one shot of a woman walking down a suburban drive way and another of her getting into a silver four-door – were included in the piece.]

I know that you’re alone. Which obviously means that you still want me in your life. You’re the most gorgeous angel(a) on God’s green earth. You could have a new man in a moment, if you wanted to. But you don’t. You want me.

I know what you would say; you're Jewish, and I'm Catholic

Would we forever resent each other if one of us had to convert? I know, I know-- I'm sure that alone is enough of an obstacle to keep us apart. But how can we know if we never try??

I can't take this torment anymore. Can we get back together? Give me another chance .

The ache in my heart can only be expressed through this Boys II Men song:

Girl you know we belong together
I have no time for you to be playing with my heart like this
You'll be mine forever baby, you just see
We belong together
And you that I'm right
Why do you play with my heart
Why do you play with my mind?
Said we'd be forever
Said it'd never die
How could you love me and leave me
And never say good-bye?
When I can't sleep at night without holding you tight
Girl each time I try I just break down and cry
Pain in my head oh I'd rather be dead
Spinnin' around and around
Although we've come to the end of the road
Still I can't let go
It's unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
Come to the end of the road
Still I can't let go
It's unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
Girl, I know you really love me
You just don't realize
You've never been there before
It's only your first time
Maybe I'll forgive you
Maybe you'll try
We should be happy together
Forever, you and I
Can you love me again like you loved me before
This time I want you to love me much more
This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don't let me down
(Mike's Monologue)
Girl I'm here for you
All those times of night when you just hurt me
And just ran out with that other fella
Baby I knew about it, I just didn't care
You just don't understand how much I love you do you?
I'm here for you
I'm not out to go out and cheat on you all night
Just like you did baby but that's all right
Hey, I love you anyway
And I'm still gonna be here for you 'till my dying day baby
Right now, I'm just in so much pain baby
'Cause you just won't come back to me
Will you? Just come back to me
Yes baby my heart is lonely
My heart hurts baby
'Cause I feel pain too
Baby please
This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don't let me go
Chorus (A Cappella)

Don't leave me hanging like this Angela. You’re my Angel(a). I miss you. Come back.


Source; Chicago Community Classifieds

< A Day in the Life | BBC White season: 'Rivers of Blood' >
How Dark My Shadow's Grown | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Missed connections take photos submissions?? by DesiredUsername (4.00 / 2) #1 Thu May 04, 2006 at 04:56:56 AM EST
Oh man, this is an underutilized trollering medium. Actually, it probably isn't.

Hey, why aren't there online missed connections?

File Under: Your Macish, I'm PC

You made a comment back in 1995 on a site that isn't active anymore that I happened to get in a google just now. That comment really moved me, so I'm wondering if you are a) looking for someone b) female and c) still alive.

Now accepting suggestions for a new sigline

Missed Connections - Photos by Christopher Robin was Murdered (2.00 / 0) #2 Thu May 04, 2006 at 04:59:16 AM EST
The online missed connections will definitely accept photos. I have yet to see an actual paper run any in their missed connections section.

[ Parent ]
there's something to be said by Kellnerin (4.00 / 1) #6 Thu May 04, 2006 at 10:28:03 AM EST
for old, dead tree media. I doubt anyone would be willing to shell out the cash for that many column inches, if they were placing a traditional ad. On the plus side, this means she can get him busted for copyright infringement.

"later" meant either "when you walk around the corner" or "oatmeal."
[ Parent ]
Yikes. by toxicfur (4.00 / 2) #3 Thu May 04, 2006 at 05:04:13 AM EST
I thought it was bad when an ex-boyfriend called my mom about once a month to see if I was still single. The calls stopped once I got married, thankfully, and I don't think he ever had me followed. If I were Angela, I'd have a restraining order filed before the day was up - I'm sure the gratuitous quoting of bad lyrics would be cause enough.
I've got more than one membership to more than one club, and I owe my life to the people that I love. - Ani DiFranco
Agreed. by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 1) #4 Thu May 04, 2006 at 05:13:04 AM EST
I can't think any judge would deny the request of a woman who is being threatened with Boys II Men lyrics.

If Pete switches to Tony! Toni! Toné! lyrics, I'm pretty sure the judge would even forgive violent measures.

[ Parent ]
oh man by tps12 (4.00 / 1) #5 Thu May 04, 2006 at 06:00:30 AM EST
"(Mike's Monologue)"

How Dark My Shadow's Grown | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback