Print Story It has become clear to me that i am a robot
By 256 (Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 07:49:43 AM EST) babies (all tags)
built for the sole purpose of creating imperfect copies of myself.

misslake and i spent the weekend with $childhood_friend and his lady. They have purchased their first house and took possession on friday, commencing a hopefully long and happy stretch of living in sin.

as an aside, while chatting with A just the other day, she had lamented about how she had been spending a lot of time with a particular ex-boyfriend from high school lately who is apparently a huge asshole. i flatly refused to offer any sympathy, suggesting that if she chose to spend time with people that made her unhappy, she could blame only herself. In response, she intimated that i couldn't understand because i had lots of old friends whereas she had made a pretty clean break from her past. All of her friends that she genuinely likes she has met within the past four years, whereas this ex-boyfriend had been a part of her life for eight or nine years now. the simple value of having known someone for that long apparently outweighed in her mind the fact that she completely disliked him as a person.

it is true, i do have rather a lot of old friends. or particularly, i am still on close terms with more than a few friends from high school. ND, for example, who lives just down the hall at the shawshack has a shared history with myself going back a good eleven years now. not to mention the obvious weight of a healthy eight year relationship with misslake and the fact that i am on quite good terms with most of my family.

but $childhood_friend is a special case. there are a lot of people that i have known for ten years. but, ten years ago, i was still basically me. if you push that line back just three more years, there is only one non-familial link remaining to my past: $childhood_friend. in fact, he and i have been friends for 21 years now.

initially, we were friends simply because of proximity. growing up in the country as i did, you can't be picky. and somehow, as we grew older and became people, though we ceased to spend much time together we always remained close. The thing that amazes me about my relationship with $childhood_friend is just how little our friendship these days seems to use our massive shared experience as a crutch. with other old friends, one i have known for far less time, it is not uncommon for the conversation to dwell primarily on catching up and reminiscing. but with $childhood_friend everything always seems fresh. even if we haven't seen each other for a year or more, we can pour a couple of drinks, sit back and it is immediately as though we've been right there with each other all along.

oops, that was a long sidetrack.... the meat of this diary (which is going to likely be quite short as my belly is rumbling; perhaps "bacon bits of this diary" would be more appropriate) is that, saturday aft and evening, while sitting around drinking vodka martinis and hanging out at $childhood_friend's new house (which is right out in the country not far from where we grew up) several other old faces from our childhood stopped in to say hello. and they brought their babies in tow.

just in the last year a switch has flipped in me where it stopped weirding me out when people my age had kids. and after a weekend of playing with the adorable human larvae of my childhood peers, the urge to reproduce is strong. it is a strange thing to look objectively at all my old reasons for not wanting children and to see that they are absolutely as valid as ever but that they simply can not stand up against the biological imperative.

ah well, not quite yet.

incidentally, when i mentioned this to E last night she said that she thought that my genetic material was not entirely maladaptive. how sweet is that?


okay, time for pizza and footie.

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It has become clear to me that i am a robot | 14 comments (14 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Rock on with your Robot Self by Arm of Roger (4.00 / 2) #1 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 07:55:41 AM EST

Road trip with my Robot Escort
A voy-age all in the name of fun
No obstructions, no disastrous follies
Just-a-spankin' on his robot bum
(Robot Explains)
Oh Robot
Arcade game, champagne, and frolic
Sunset strolls out by the ferris wheel
Oh how dearly dreadful I shan't not know
how my robot escort really feels
Tell me Robot.
(Robot Explains)
Road trip with my robot escort
I'll never know just how he feels

Aaah by Rogerborg (4.00 / 3) #6 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 11:19:29 AM EST
That's where I left that thing.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
Children of your own are a trip by georgeha (4.00 / 4) #2 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 08:45:11 AM EST
I mean like a 20+ year long acid trip, they really, really warp your reality. I'm sure getting my money's worth.

Kids are cute. by calla (4.00 / 12) #3 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 08:48:38 AM EST
Kids are great.

Kids are fun.

Kids can really fuck up your weekend plans.

Just a reminder.

Hey hulver, by blixco (4.00 / 2) #7 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 12:08:21 PM EST
can you give her, like, a nine for this comment, maybe make it a site title?  Because it is the best info I've seen in a long time.  I mean, not that I was contemplating having kids, but this reminds me: I've got shit to do.
Taken out of context I must seem so strange - Ani DiFranco
[ Parent ]
awe shucks. by calla (4.00 / 1) #10 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 09:25:45 PM EST
I feel like I've been blessed.

[ Parent ]
oh, i know. by 256 (4.00 / 1) #12 Tue Mar 21, 2006 at 09:06:50 AM EST
this is certainly not something we are going to jump in to.

this is something that we have spent years discussing and only just recently made the switch from "probably never" to "probably in a couple of years".

the best part of it all is my mom who, when i mentioned to her that we were even considering it, went: "do it do it do it. you have the babies and i'll take care of them whenever you want. if you don't like them, i'll keep them."
I don't think anyone's ever really died from smoking. --ni

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Make sure you stay around mom then. by calla (2.00 / 0) #13 Tue Mar 21, 2006 at 09:36:43 AM EST
With her help you may be able to stay sane.

[ Parent ]
I'd have had to bite my tongue by lm (2.00 / 0) #4 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 08:55:20 AM EST
``I'm sorry all your old friends are such assholes.''

There is no more degenerate kind of state than that in which the richest are supposed to be the best.
Cicero, The Republic
This reminds me of a dream I had the other day.. by Driusan (4.00 / 5) #5 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 09:47:13 AM EST
..where someone gave me their baby to look after, and when I picked it up it hissed and clawed at me with it's hind legs then ran off.  I had to chase it down (which wasn't very difficult, since it was a newborn and therefore not very fast), and go through the pick-up, get clawed, chase it down routine about 4-5 times. Eventually I managed to corner it, and it turned invisible. I sighed, gave up, and decided to just leave the little infant human-cat bastard alone. I think the invisible baby grinned a cheshire cat grin after that, then started licking himself. I walked away and left it there and we were both a lot happier.

The moral of the story? I figure it's either "infants are evil and thrive on neglect" or "don't leave me to look after your children."

Vive le Montréal libre.

Babies are cute. by komet (4.00 / 2) #8 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 02:48:38 PM EST
They are, after all, nature's way of tricking you into willingly producing future teenagers.

<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.
Teenagers can be cute too by Rogerborg (4.00 / 5) #11 Tue Mar 21, 2006 at 01:10:55 AM EST
You just need to know how to phrase an eDonkey search.

Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
Well . . . by slozo (4.00 / 1) #9 Mon Mar 20, 2006 at 06:30:17 PM EST
. . . it's finally happening. Let's get this commune started up! The one and only thing it's missing is babies . . .

man, I wish I was there to "help" . . .

you and your confusing use of scare quotes by 256 (4.00 / 1) #14 Mon Mar 27, 2006 at 11:17:56 AM EST
i can't help but read this as an innuendo about getting into misslake's pants.

I don't think anyone's ever really died from smoking. --ni
[ Parent ]
It has become clear to me that i am a robot | 14 comments (14 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback