Print Story Putting the fun in fundamental
Wizards and Hobbits
By Bob Abooey (Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:20:53 AM EST) Chopin, lesbians, polyester, oatmeal (all tags)
The B.A.D.TM

Like you're favourite blue shirt...



  • Bah. I have work to do. I'm not doing it. My voice-mail light has been taunting me all morning, I'm not giving in to it. Indeed, am I nothing but a simple minded slave, akin to Pavlov's dog?? My voice-mail light flashes and I salivate???? I think not. I'm my own man and I'll check my voice-mail when I darn well feel like it and not a moment before!
  • Yesterday I went to visit Dr. Bombay, to get the bump on my hand checked out and whatnot. Firstly, she gave me the riot act cause I haven't been in for about 5 years. Heck, I haven't been sick or injured (except the broken finger, but it's not like she could do anything about that) so why add burden to the already effed up health system?? We differed on that point.

    The bump is indeed a ganglion cyst, as I had diagnosed, but I didn't have the heart to tell her that she wasted all those years in med school now that we have the ability to diagnose ourselves with the Internet. Still it was nice to get that one small point affirmed. She pretty much said to see if it goes away on it's own which was my plan as well. Then she jabbed at me and poked and prodded at me and stuff and generally decided I'm the most fit and healthy bloke on the planet, except she diagnosed me as having too much blood -n- urine in my system and sent me down to the lab to take care of that poste haste. So there you have it, unless I get bad news back from the blood and urine people I'm good for another 5 years!!

  • Right. The secret to my great health is nothing other than the hammy sammy, which I will ceremoniously cram down my snickers-hole for lunch today.
  • Hey boys -n- Gurlz... guess what time it is!! Go ahead!! Guess!! It's Spring Training Time!! Take me out to the friggin ballgame!! Take me out to the friggin park!!! Cram my pie-hole with some peanuts and cracker jacks!! Woooo!!! I don't care if I ever get back!!! You know what that means, right? It means that warm weather is just around the corner!
  • You've got to give my ol pal Scott McClellan some credit for trying a new tack yesterday... I mean, I'm guessing he thought he could be pro-active and stop the hounds from going on and on about the whole thing if he made some levity and whatnot. But really, if I'm a family member of the guy that Cheney gunned down in cold blood, well, I'm probably not finding any jocularity there. Especially as the guy is now teetering on the brink of death. It's interesting that this regime (You know about the Scooter Libby indictments, right) doesn't seem to learn that it's best to just come out with the truth and get it over with cause it's going to come out anyways and you just look stupid by trying to hide and cloak stuff. Nimrods.
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Putting the fun in fundamental | 18 comments (18 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
Bob, by MillMan (2.00 / 0) #1 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:24:28 AM EST
this may be the last year of the Minnesota Twins.

Noam Chomsky: Well, forget about the hippies and so on and so forth.

Yeah by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:35:52 AM EST
They've been teetering on the brink of leaving town for quite a while, no? Is this related to the stadium issue?

Be that as it may, I'm picking them to bounce back this year and compete for the Central. In fact I look for the ChiSox to run into some injuries and bad luck and come back to earth this season so the Central should be wide open. Sadly the Tribe hasn't improved much over the off-season so I'm counting them as a bit of a long shot as it stands right now. Still, at least we won't totally suck, which is what really matters.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
they might be contracted by MillMan (2.00 / 0) #5 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:41:31 AM EST
They are out of their stadium lease after this year by court order. The last time this was attempted, their inability to get out of the lease was the only hangup that I know of. I think the execs learned their lesson after that debacle and are now in stealth mode with nothing coming out about it, until official word comes out in July or so. At that point they'll be contracted or there will magically be $600 million in public money for a new stadium.

I doubt they'll move...there aren't any markets large to move to in order to make it worthwhile(and I don't buy the Vegas option).

Noam Chomsky: Well, forget about the hippies and so on and so forth.

[ Parent ]
I'd be surprised by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #7 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:52:27 AM EST
Really I think the whole contraction thing is politics but then again nobody ever thought the Browns would leave Clevia back in the 90's.

I don't understand why they can't get a new stadium pushed through. Heck, both Baltimore and Detroit, arguably the armpits of the planet, got nice new stadiums. Minn surely can work it out.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
David Gregory by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:35:46 AM EST

should be demoted for long enough to figure out how to call local law enforcement agencies to check their blotters. I guess being part of the Big Shot White House Press Corpse means you don't have to do any legwork to get the stories your corporate masters use to sell Nivea, Volkswagon, and Coke.


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
It's show biz! by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:46:03 AM EST
Frankly I like the nutty guy from the NY Post (I think that's his paper) that always has those long winded conspiracy questions that make no sense what-so-ever.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
Personally, I can't wait by MohammedNiyalSayeed (2.00 / 0) #8 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:58:29 AM EST

until reporters have to start embedding product plugs in their questions. That's gonna be friggin' SWEET!


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You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
Really though by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #11 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 07:04:19 AM EST
The whole thing is a farce and has been for some time.

The Press Secretary is just a party shill that puts out more spin than Dick Cheney on a hunting trip when the game is afoot, and the press corp really has no choice but to hammer away on questions they know they won't get a straight answer on.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
Name me one by ad hoc (4.00 / 3) #4 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:39:13 AM EST
administration who thought it was best to come out with the truth right away instead of being forced to later?

I'm not one who believes Bush is Hitler. He's much more like Stalin.
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Why do they call it "lactose intolerant?" They should call it "lactose inconsiderate."

I think he's more along the lines of by MillMan (4.00 / 2) #9 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 06:58:35 AM EST
an inbred, ineffectual old-European aristocrat. He's never had to deal with limits or consequences - good example is his tax cutting and jacked up spending. He has little understanding of what life is like for anyone outside of his social class and has a very thinly veiled contempt for everyone outside of it. He's also got that air of detachment from reality and related confusion that comes with that territory. If he had drive and intelligence he would really scare me.

Noam Chomsky: Well, forget about the hippies and so on and so forth.

[ Parent ]
The Carter Administration? by wiredog (4.00 / 1) #16 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 10:25:43 AM EST
Which was voted out of office as soon as was practicable, but still.

Earth First!
(We can strip mine the rest later.)

[ Parent ]
I'm trying to think of a scandal. by ad hoc (2.00 / 0) #17 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 10:40:33 AM EST
While he was truthful and forthright, I can't really recall much of a scandal that he had to come clean about. Maybe Hamilton Jordon's cocaine use? (or was it Jody Powell?)

Granted, he wasn't a great president, but not particularly scandal ridden as I recall.

Even this list doesn't come up with much.
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Why do they call it "lactose intolerant?" They should call it "lactose inconsiderate."

[ Parent ]
Too much blood and urine by DesiredUsername (2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 07:02:40 AM EST
You must have dropped out of Internet Medical School a little too early, since there's a cure for that, too.

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Now accepting suggestions for a new sigline
Yeah by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #12 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 07:15:46 AM EST
We disagreed on that small point (the whole blood letting point) too, but she won that battle, and heck, the giant insurance company is footing the bill so what do I care!

The blood lady was a real pro though, there's just a tiny little mark where she impaled me and no bruising at all.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
hi bob by LilFlightTest (2.00 / 0) #13 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 07:43:18 AM EST
as the resident sammich expert, what's your favorite type of bun/roll thing?
Send me to Austria!
Hello Pickles! by Bob Abooey (2.00 / 0) #14 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 08:17:36 AM EST
I've been a function over form kinda guy lately, sticking with whole wheat buns as that's the best carb choice, I think.

Other than that I would say it depends on the type of sammich or what's on sale at the bakery department.

Warmest regards,
--Your best pal Bob

[ Parent ]
Blood in Urine by molasses (2.00 / 0) #15 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 09:51:57 AM EST
i've had it for the past 4 years running.  I've been prodded and poke and all sorts of uncomfortable things, and the found...

nothing.

some people just have it they say.  weird.  i don't see it, so they watch it every year to make sure nothing else is going on.

the first time i went in to get it checked out, they looked at my gallbladder (they were sonogramming my bladder).  three weeks later they took out the galbladder - it was FULL of stones.  This was not causing the blood in my urine,but i'm glad they found it.  My insurance ran out right after the surgery.

horray!

You should slam a big book on that lump by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #18 Wed Feb 15, 2006 at 11:57:31 AM EST
'Cause... uh... it'll help break it up.  Most likely.  plspstmp3ofscream.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
Putting the fun in fundamental | 18 comments (18 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback