Print Story Harsh: A WFC4 Post-Mortem
Diary
By toxicfur (Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 03:23:37 PM EST) (all tags)
Yes, I wrote A Harsh Mistress. Really, I tried to write a heterosexual story. Really. I did try.

Didn't work.



I had this idea that I'd take the whole sex theme and kind of turn it on its head. I wanted to play with the stereotypes of sex-obsessed men and frigid women and turn it on its head. So my idea was to have the male character watching cheesy porn and his girlfriend coming in and making fun of the porn, then trying to get him to have sex, when that wasn't actually what he wanted. I had no idea how to end the story, though, until the homoerotic stuff showed up in the porn film. I can't write heterosexuality, it seems.

I actually think I managed to accomplish my goal, except for one part: I wanted it to walk that line between funny in a geeky way and uncomfortable in a "hey, I dated that bitch" way, and I erred far too far on the side of uncomfortable. I blame that on my recent dark mood. I should've written about death and pretended it was some sort of deep metaphor for sex.

So, the reviews:

fleece: at least it makes sense. i had to google for Heinlein to understand what Heinlein porn was. kept me reading, anyway.
I realized after I'd posted that I hadn't actually said what the title of the film was and why it would be Heinlein porn. The title of the film was, of course, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress (thus, the title of the story). I had somewhat naively assumed that most people would be familiar with the book, but I should have written the story so that it would be understandable without the knowledge, but have a bit more depth with the knowledge. Thanks, fleece, for saying that it kept you reading, though - was nice to hear.

2 plus 3 equals 5: I loved this one, but I'm a Heinlein geek. This was funny, in a cringe-producing way. I don't want a girlfriend like that.
Funny in a cringe-producing way was kind of what I was going for, so I'm glad that came through for some people. In regards to the girlfriend, yeah, exactly. Both characters were based on me - the part of me who digs porn, and the part of me who can't help but make fun of the porn, especially in the company of others. I did ask ana the physics questions, though.

persimmon: Hottest scene involving flaccid penis I've ever read. Also, Heinlein. Voted.
Hah! This review made me laugh, especially since the scene was anything but hot when I was writing it. My feeble attempts at writing serious erotica showed me I shouldn't try to do that. Ever again.

Kellnerin: Excruciating. Meant to be, I think.
Scrymarch: Meditations on squirming.
256: i'm not convinced i enjoyed this story. it was well crafted, but the awkwardness was too palpable for reading it to be fun. still, it gets a vote purely on the merit of having caused me to have a heinleinian sex dream the night after reading it.
These, I'm doing together, since they all talk about the major point of failing with this story. But first off, I loved K's reviews. By far the most creative way to talk about a group of stories. Also, 256 made me laugh, though I really don't think I want the details of that dream.

As I said above, the story was meant to be somewhat uncomfortable, but more funny than excruciating and not meant to induce lots of squirmage. That was part of my failure. That, and changing tense for one paragraph (which K was kind enough not to point out). I really shouldn't try to write humor with $evil_project hanging over my head.

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Harsh: A WFC4 Post-Mortem | 16 comments (16 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
stop fucking guys by maynard (2.00 / 0) #1 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:01:36 PM EST
supposedly you'll become heterosexual given enough time. Might even become married, buy a house with a white picket fence, and raise 2.5 kids.

I fuck fish, but it sounds pretty lame to me too.

You may not know this... by toxicfur (4.00 / 3) #2 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:06:35 PM EST
but I am biologically female, and I am legally married to someone with a different biology. On the surface, I look like the typical suburban wife. I think my queerness (yeah, I've fucked girls and guys both; happend to fall in love with someone who's a bit of both) has to come out somehow.
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inspiritation: the effect of irritating someone so much it inspires them to do something about it. --BuggEye
[ Parent ]
You may not know this... by MohammedNiyalSayeed (4.00 / 4) #3 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:11:32 PM EST

but You Two look about as opposite as could be possible than the typical suburban married couple. Also note that this is intended to be a compliment, not any sort of offense.


-
You can build the most elegant fountain in the world, but eventually a winged rat will be using it as a drinking bowl.
[ Parent ]
And you... by toxicfur (4.00 / 1) #5 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:18:39 PM EST
have just made me very happy by saying that. I certainly take it as a compliment, since the very last thing I want to be is part of a typical suburban married couple. I can't think of anything more boring (no offense to those who are perfectly happy being a part of a typical suburban married couple).
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inspiritation: the effect of irritating someone so much it inspires them to do something about it. --BuggEye
[ Parent ]
does it deserve a compliment? by persimmon (2.00 / 0) #7 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:22:45 PM EST
Certainly it's funny and sweet.

It might even be dramatic irony.
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"Nature is such a fucking plagarist."

[ Parent ]
You're right, I didn't know. by maynard (4.00 / 1) #4 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:13:24 PM EST
Not sure it changes my comment though...

[ Parent ]
And it probably shouldn't. by toxicfur (4.00 / 1) #6 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:20:14 PM EST
I think I would've been happy to be a gay guy. Turned out I'm just an oddly queer woman, who tends to be less woman and more queer from time to time.
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inspiritation: the effect of irritating someone so much it inspires them to do something about it. --BuggEye
[ Parent ]
Not me. by maynard (2.00 / 0) #9 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:47:28 PM EST
Have you ever seen a cock in a gym athletic center? Guys with hair and dudes who act like -- all -- jock and shit? Fuck that. I'm sorry, there is nothing fuckable about men. Or, if there is, this man doesn't understand.

Which is OK. I'm heterosexual and don't want it homo-fucking. I'm OK with those who do... but when gay sex comes up all ... I can think about is watching two chicks.

*sigh* Suppose that's more me than two women.

[ Parent ]
typical suburban wife by MillMan (4.00 / 3) #10 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 09:41:57 PM EST
that made me lol. I may have said "lollerskates" out loud as well.

When I'm imprisoned as an enemy combatant, will you blog about it?

[ Parent ]
I don't think the fence is white by iGrrrl (4.00 / 1) #15 Tue Nov 07, 2006 at 05:12:21 AM EST
But they do have the house and the dog and cats.  Do animals have some conversion factor for kid equivalence?

"Beautiful wine, talking of scattered everythings"
(and thanks to Scrymarch)

[ Parent ]
i read this with trepidation, due to comments by persimmon (4.00 / 1) #8 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 04:26:43 PM EST
And at first I thought I would hate it. I dragged myself through all the porn-mocking.

Then I got to the part about the nails, and it pulled it all together for me.
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"Nature is such a fucking plagarist."

You and Stephen Fry by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #11 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 11:16:34 PM EST
He's written some interesting stories but when it comes to heteros and their sexual ways he hasn't got a fucking clue.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

Not to say that YOU don't have a clue by ReallyEvilCanine (4.00 / 1) #12 Mon Nov 06, 2006 at 11:31:04 PM EST
Just mentioning that a really well-known homosexual writer can't write anything which has to do with sex if any character involved is a breeder. The interactions of sex just can't be written well without having experienced them. Clearly you're further along than Fry.

the internet: amplifier of stupidity -- discordia

[ Parent ]
Heinlein porn by 2 plus 3 equals 5 (4.00 / 1) #13 Tue Nov 07, 2006 at 04:21:14 AM EST
The mere idea amused the fuck out of me.  I wonder how they handled Professor Bernardo de la Paz?

-- Do the math.
Good question... by toxicfur (4.00 / 1) #14 Tue Nov 07, 2006 at 04:33:18 AM EST
In the backstory I had in my head, the producers of the film were responsible for the creation of a series of SF porn, and basically went through the classics and skimmed enough of the ones with double-entendre-able titles to make a film. They didn't get, for instance, the idea that weight on the moon is quite different, and they probably ignored the subtleties - like, you know, the actual plot. So in this case, the Warden was female and the insurgents were young, virile men. Prof may not have shown up at all, or, if he did, it would be as a bit part.

I actually had a much better idea of what was going on in the film than I did what was going on with the two main characters. That certainly didn't help my story any.
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inspiritation: the effect of irritating someone so much it inspires them to do something about it. --BuggEye

[ Parent ]
I thought by Scrymarch (4.00 / 1) #16 Tue Nov 07, 2006 at 10:26:04 AM EST
... the unspoken porn-pun title of the movie was amusingly implicit.

The Political Science Department of the University of Woolloomooloo

Harsh: A WFC4 Post-Mortem | 16 comments (16 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback