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Diary
By CwazyWabbit (Wed Aug 10, 2005 at 09:19:18 PM EST) (all tags)
Every time I hear a gobby idiot talking about integration in the multiculturalism debate I wonder if we should apply the cricket test to anybody migrating across the country. How many Sun readers would support the idea that they owe their loyalty to the football club they live closest to rather than the one they grew up supporting? We could have entrance exams across counties, boroughs even in London. Actually, London would probably collapse after deporting all the scousers and geordies.


In other news, my company has "Caution! Hot water!" signs above the centre of each  sink in the toilets. Since one expects hot water from the hot tap, I am worried that this placement indicates it may issue from unexpected locations. Hence, I am letting the cold tap run a bit and trying to stay out of the range of a surprise plug hole ejaculation. Please pray for my safety.
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Caution! Hot water! by monkeymind (3.50 / 2) #1 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 12:02:38 AM EST
One employer I had posted "For the Health of All. Please wash you hands after each visit." signs posted in every bathroom. Well I didn't check the ladies. So I wrote with a half page treaties entitled.

Modern Hyper Cleanliness and its role in increasing Asthma and other allergies"

I stuck this next to each sign. The next day it was gone. So I stuck them up again. This time with wall paper glue.

Yeah, that would have been funny by Rogerborg (4.00 / 2) #4 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 01:08:13 AM EST
You should have done that in real life as well.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
busted. by monkeymind (2.00 / 0) #5 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 02:04:21 AM EST
ok, so the bit about the wallpaper glue was crap. But hey, who wants complete honesty all the time?

[ Parent ]
Not me by Rogerborg (4.00 / 1) #6 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 02:13:16 AM EST
I feel sullied by knowing that you're living in a Walter Mitty fantasy world.  At least have the common conservative values of continuing the lie to the bitter end.

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Metus amatores matrum compescit, non clementia.
[ Parent ]
I feel more insulted by monkeymind (4.00 / 2) #7 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 02:40:48 AM EST
being called a conservative than a lier

[ Parent ]
Anyway the terrorists by jump the ladder (4.00 / 3) #2 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 12:05:17 AM EST
Would have passed the  cricket test. Wasn't one of the 21/7 bombers wearing an England shirt?

What?! by gazbo (4.00 / 5) #3 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 12:30:06 AM EST
Those cunning bastards!

I recommend always assuming 7th normal form where items in a text column are not allowed to rhyme.

[ Parent ]
A reminder by ad hoc (4.00 / 1) #8 Thu Aug 11, 2005 at 05:48:42 AM EST

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You jest by nebbish (4.00 / 1) #9 Mon Aug 15, 2005 at 06:26:06 AM EST
But here's an idiot who poured just-boiled water over his hand yesterday because someone asked him a question whilst he was making a cup of tea. I need signs like that everywhere to be honest.

It didn't hurt as much as it should have done, which I put down to not having enough intellect to feel pain.

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It's political correctness gone mad!

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