Print Story Interesting 'weekend' and more
By CountSpatula (Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 05:36:34 AM EST) (all tags)
Today is my 'Monday', as I have had the past two days off.  And what an interesting weekend it was!

Inside:  Weird email, description of said gay guy, circle massage, nephew fun!

Got this weird email from a friend of mine that lives in Milwaukee.  Here goes:

hey this is red-headed-mohawk when i was out in
lacrosse last time jeff. jenny said that you had
g-mail invites, i would like one, and she said youd
gimme one. so gimme dammit, i want fucking gmail.
sorry, im drunk n stoned right now.

thank you for your time mr gmail person thingy of


ps: stoned and drunk!

pps: that gay guy at the party sucked.

I particularly enjoy that 'ps: stoned and drunk!' at the end.  I don't believe I've received a more amusing email.

The gay guy whom he mentions at the end of the email was this particular individual who has now been officially uninvited to all occurrences at this house, and is specifically banned from entering the premises.  Here's the story behind that.

We had a housewarming about three weeks ago, and I was enjoying myself, drinking a nice dry wine and chilling out.  The mood was very calm and relaxed, and all attendees, save one, were being friendly, cordial and intimate (not in that way, perverts!).  This gay guy and I were chatting, and I mentioned that I was going to buy my gay brother a shirt that reads "I'm so gay, I'm almost straight!"  So this guy takes that to mean that I'm actually gay, and just repressing myself.  At first, I laugh it off as a gay guy just needing to get laid, and tell him that actually I'm pretty hot for ladies around 30 to 45, preferably (but not required) eastern European.  Accents melt my knees, too.  But, he doesn't accept this and goes on, for two whole fucking hours, about how I'm gay.  Complete buzzkill.  I retire, and this guy, the next day, gets the axe.  And good for him, too.

We had a circle massage on Sunday down in the dining room, and now my shoulders ache again.  Had you walked in to the house and not seen what was going on, you'd swear we were having a gang bang.  The only thing that sucked about that is that now I need another shoulder massage, and nobody is around to give it to me.  Bugger!

Saw more cool pictures of my nephew.


I can't wait until he's old enough for me to really spoil him.  I believe my sister will probably assassinate me, or something like that.  But, it's her fault for giving me a cool nephew!  hehehe.

Anyhow, have a fun day, kids.  I've got a nice, relaxing noon to 8:30 today, with two closings following on Friday and Saturday.  Easy work.  I can't believe they pay me as much as they do for this.  Wait, strike that, I need the money, and I think it's proper I get paid to stock shelves and check out the MILFs.

Have a good one, people!

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Interesting 'weekend' and more | 5 comments (5 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback
You seem awfully defensive and touchy by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #1 Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 05:40:36 AM EST
about being called gay. Maybe the gay guys's Gaydar was more finly tuned than you realize.

I don't mind being called gay. by CountSpatula (2.00 / 0) #2 Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 05:47:31 AM EST
Hell, I experimented once.  Didn't really like it, though, so I'm pretty much a straight guy.  And, it doesn't bother me when someone's gaydar goes off at me.  I mean, I love theatre, watch lots of musicals, dress well and sit with my legs tightly crossed.  Oh yeah, gaydar goes off at me sometimes.  But, to be told I'm gay, for two hours straight, by a guy that's sometimes yelling, and will not stop, yeah, that fucking bothers me, especially when I'm trying to have a good time and meet new people.

Honestly, this guy was just a total dick, and wouldn't stop.  That's why I got pissed at him.

"I've never been more afraid of a diary comment EVAR." - RapidHamster

[ Parent ]
+1FP eyebanging MILFS. [nt] by vorheesleatherface (4.00 / 1) #3 Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 04:45:50 PM EST

The cool thing is... by CountSpatula (4.00 / 1) #4 Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 08:19:24 PM EST
...they have no idea, really, that they're being watched.  At least, that's how it seems.  Maybe they just don't care, though.  That is within the realm of possibility.

"I've never been more afraid of a diary comment EVAR." - RapidHamster
[ Parent ]
I think they know by vorheesleatherface (2.00 / 0) #5 Thu Oct 20, 2005 at 10:11:47 PM EST
While "eyebanging milfs" is most likely an offensive phrase to some females, it echos truth. Men just love to get an eyeful of a sexy mature woman.

While blatantly leering and drooling is obviously not something a woman would enjoy, realising that they are being descretely admired would, I would assume, be quite flattering to any woman. People like feeling sexy.

[ Parent ]
Interesting 'weekend' and more | 5 comments (5 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback