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Ranting
By codemonkey uk (Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 12:42:28 AM EST) (all tags)
You know one thing that really pisses me off? No? Well I'm going to tell you (real swearing included).


People who don't know how to queue.

Yes, that's right, I'm talking to you, the otherwise good people of Austria, and what the hell, pretty much everywhere other than Great Briton and perhaps the United States of America.

People who either get on the train without letting people get of first, and people who push into line, or queue jump, need a good stabbing.

Andie actually had to make me leave the hospital today where we were supposed to be getting her a blood test before I made a scene. Or if you ask her, because I made a scene.

But I digress.

A good stabbing would teach those fucks some manners.

Ahem.

Anyway, other than that, I'm having a lovely week with Andie and Dylan.

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Radio 4 by sL1mB0y (5.00 / 1) #1 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 12:49:13 AM EST
Had something about that the other night ... some new book out about "Watching the English" or something ... how Britain is the easiest place to queue-jump (it's rare to complain loudly about it) but also where among natives it's the rarest

Lemmy loves you




I fuckin' hate that by BadDoggie (6.00 / 3) #2 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 12:53:14 AM EST
These clueless twonks who have push their way into the train/subway/bus while people are trying to get out.

I puff out the chest, spread the arms a bit and repeat very loudly, "ERST aussteigen, DANN einsteigen" (Airst OWSS'-shty-gn, DON' Ine-shty-gn) as I push through the bastards.

While they don't listen too well and sometimes get huffy about being pushed out of the way, I certainly get no small amount of satisfaction occasionally knocking some of the rude bastards out of the way. the thing is, they know them's the rules and still push through.

I could really go off on a rant here...

woof.

"Non videri sed esse." — Tycho Brahe
"Not to be seen but to be."


you taught us how to pronounce it but by Nigga (3.00 / 1) #13 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 02:46:39 AM EST
we dono wtf it means... what's it mean?



[ Parent ]

First get off, by ambrosen (5.00 / 1) #14 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 02:56:41 AM EST
Then get on.

Although an idiomatic translation into English English would probably be "Let everyone get off first".

[ Parent ]

Although not a stabbing.... by Alice Pulley (6.00 / 1) #3 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 12:58:13 AM EST
An amusing story for you non-the less. Was waiting for a cab with Mark K (for anyone other than Codemonkey, Mark is 6ft 4 inches and apr 17 stones or for USians 238lbs) and a couple of other pals.

Group of annoying yoofs pushed not only in front of us (which frankly I wouldn't be too bothered about) but also in front of a group of young girls who'd been waiting for ages.

Mark K politely (well, maybe not) told the yoofs to get to the back of the queue but was subject to an attempted assault. I say attempted because the yoof in question was about 1/3 of Marks size. Mark then preceeded to simply hold the person by the throat until they stopped being an ass. In the meantime all his mates were kicking off (although not physically doing anything). Getting bored of this, Nick who was with us (a policeman but a really cool bloke) had them arrested them for being drunk and disorderly by some nearby coppers.

Laugh - I nearly dropped my kebab.

Copyright - Classy Harlow Nights Out Inc.

--

'But they're adults and perfectly capable of working it out themselves. And if not, well, fuck em.' - Nebbish '06.



You would get on well with Mrs Creo. by creo (5.00 / 1) #4 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:06:06 AM EST
She is perpetually bitching about queuing in Europe. Mind you, her bitching (as almost certainly is yours) is fully justified.

If you line up for anything (line up in the loosest sense of the term) and you pause for a fraction of a second, then POW, someone is in there.

If you don't push forward yourself then the person behind you starts trying to push you forward.

We have found this in all European countries we have travelled except the UK and Malta. Oh, and Tallinn, but in Tallin there is generally not enough people to foram a queue.

I guess it's just an Anglo thing to be polite in terms of queuing.

A classic mrs Creo quote goes along the lines of...

me: It's just a cultural thing, get used to it.
her: Bullshit - they are just rude bastards.

Cheers
Creo.

"I shall do what I believe to be right and honourable" - Guderian


Couldn't agree more. by yicky yacky (5.00 / 1) #5 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:06:13 AM EST

What is interesting, though, are those circumstances where it's perfectly acceptable to ignore "the rules" - the "all bets are off" scenarios.

You know the ones I mean. Trolley full of sustainance, eleven people between you and checkout satisfaction, air conditioning has gone, everybody watched you just so they could decide to shop at exactly the same time. Suddenly - 10 o'clock - new till front opening up - 'No way, fucker; that's mine...'


----
Vacuity abhors a vacuum.


New till by codemonkey uk (5.00 / 1) #6 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:16:05 AM EST
Well, in the absence of a civilized system, such as I have seen implemented in Sainsburys of Oxford, where by there is a single queue served by multiple tills, the opening of a new till is,as they say, open season. You plays the game, you takes your chances. There is no queue for the new till yet, but there will be, and if you go for it you loose you place in the current queue...

--- Thad ---
Growing a mustache for charity.
[ Parent ]

Indeed. The gamble mitigates all guilt. [nt] by yicky yacky (5.00 / 1) #9 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:31:30 AM EST

----
Vacuity abhors a vacuum.
[ Parent ]

ahh by Politburo (3.00 / 0) #30 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 10:45:07 AM EST
where by there is a single queue served by multiple tills

Anytime I am at the store, or any other place with multiple lines, I wonder why this isn't the case more often. Oh, that's right, you have to stand in line at the store so they can try to sell you more crap...

[ Parent ]

queuing by Merekat (5.00 / 1) #7 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:21:29 AM EST
Having queued for cablecars in Austria with my hand in plaster, I see precisely where you are coming from.



What I'm thinking by theboz (5.00 / 2) #8 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 01:21:38 AM EST
People who either get on the train without letting people get of first, and people who push into line, or queue jump, need a good stabbing.

I'm thinking that they need a good stabbing through the ear with a bull's dick.
- - - - -
That's what I always say about you, boz, you have a good memory for random facts about pussy. -- joh3n


Queuing is over rated, and Londoners don't queue. by fritz the cat (2.00 / 2) #10 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 02:20:55 AM EST
Jesus, you Brits love banging on about your supposed 'superiority', don't you?

First of all, this queueing thing may happen in the provinces, but in London nobody queues. Ever. The clearest proof is underneath the city, in the underground, where people pushes each other out of the way quite viciously. And it's the Londoners who do this, not the tourists, most of which are utterly unprepared for this and sometimes end up pushed onto the wrong train.

Secondly, queueing is not necessarily the mark of a higher civilisation. An alternative view is that it is the sign of a lack of wits.
According to this alternative theory, queueing is a mechanism designed to allow people in a group to interact with each other without talking and without physical contact. It takes a lot of skills to push your way to the front without queueing - a little smile here, an apology, a funny comment, or an insult said with exactly the right tone of voice at the right momen in time, a knee stuck strategically into the precise spot which will ensure you move up two positions within half an hour.
All this skills are, unfortunately, lacking amongst the Brits, and therefore the authorities had to invent queueing, which, as also the side effect of creating a sheep-like mentality amongst the masses.

Yes, that's right, I'm talking to you, the otherwise good people of Austria, and what the hell, pretty much everywhere other than Great Briton and perhaps the United States of America.
Funny how you assume the Brits are more similar to the Yanks than the rest of Europe - you don't travel much, do you?
Even if they queued in the States, it would be because everyone carry guns, and people don't want to get shot down while waiting for a Whopper Meal.


[Ed.: currently a dormant account - posting on behalf of extremely tedious HuSer]


The states by ucblockhead (3.00 / 0) #18 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 03:45:09 AM EST
People often line up in the States.

On the train I take every morning, there's a system about it. Trains go three different directions. You'll see two lines for each door. As the train approaches, those who won't be taking the train step to the outside and those who are boarding do so down the center in an orderly fashion.

You can always tell the foreign (non-english speaking) tourists in the tourist areas, as they're the ones crowding everybody.
---
[ucblockhead is] useless and subhuman
[ Parent ]

We ARE superior, and you're jealous by Cwis (3.00 / 0) #20 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:08:27 AM EST
Get over it.

[ Parent ]

Nonsense. by fritz the cat (3.00 / 0) #21 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:18:12 AM EST
How many World Cups did you win, again?

[Ed.: currently a dormant account - posting on behalf of extremely tedious HuSer]
[ Parent ]

Mmmm by Cwis (3.00 / 0) #23 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:33:53 AM EST
And you were on the winning side of exactly how many wars?

[ Parent ]

The same as you by fritz the cat (3.00 / 0) #24 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:37:00 AM EST
At least we don't pretend we wont them single-handedly ;-)

[Ed.: currently a dormant account - posting on behalf of extremely tedious HuSer]
[ Parent ]

Do we? by Cwis (3.00 / 0) #25 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:53:30 AM EST
Yeah - but did you start on the same side you finished on? ;-)

Bollocks to that - I think we'd both agree that everyone was fighting against a particular group of people from a number of countries rather than the actual countries themselves - unfortunately they were in power....

As an average UKian, I don't think anyone born here will ever forget the help we received from all over the world - my grandfather was actually in the Czech army....

[ Parent ]

Well, by ambrosen (6.00 / 1) #11 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 02:39:31 AM EST
at least the non-UKians know well enough exactly where to put crisp packets, chocolate wrappers, drinks cans, fag ends, etc. (Hint for my fellow-citizens: it's far more complicated than just letting go of it)



Heh. by i (5.00 / 1) #15 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 03:00:25 AM EST
Especially the Spaniards.


[ Parent ]

queues are for retards by Nigga (3.00 / 1) #12 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 02:43:48 AM EST
If an establishment wants to get so technical about it then let people take a number...  standing in line (as they say it in USA) is just a pointless waste of time... give me a number so i can go sit down or leave and come back or whatever.   Otherwise, just be assertive but also aware of who came in before you... it's not that hard.





Talk about over engineering! by codemonkey uk (3.00 / 0) #17 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 03:43:09 AM EST
What, take a number for wiating for a lift? Getting on a bus/train? Buying a loaf of bread? Don't be a dick. These things are done and over with in less than five minutes, if everyone queues up and waits their turn. Or, if people push and shove, then some people save, like 30 seconds, but the frail, shy or physically disabled end up waiting a lot longer. Imagine if car drivers acted in the same way on the road!

--- Thad ---
Growing a mustache for charity.
[ Parent ]

to those of you who reckon pushing is better by flowergrrl (6.00 / 1) #16 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 03:28:20 AM EST
pregnant people JUST DONT!!! (until actually giving birth that is)

I am way too sickly to be sick all over me as well as everyone else!!

besides, this was a very slow queue of like 4 people, noone complained at the jumpee (who was turkish, does that make a difference??)

So Austrians dont seem to complain either, they just suck at queueing and dont complain!!

Andie



Threatening to puke by komet (3.00 / 0) #19 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 03:47:21 AM EST
is a great way to encourage others to get out of your way.

"Ich muss gleich kotzen" = "I'm about to puke". Try it sometime.

--
<ni> komet: You are functionally illiterate as regards trashy erotica.
[ Parent ]

Do not push by Herring (3.00 / 0) #28 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 06:24:12 AM EST
Until you are fully dilated.

[ Parent ]

You Goddamn British Fucks don't queue by greyrat (3.00 / 0) #22 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 04:24:13 AM EST
any better than anybody else. At least the Goddamned snaggle-toothed, unwashed loud-mouthed, whiney Limeys I've seen at various tourist attractions in various countries don't know how to queue.

Maybe you act better when the queen is near enought to bitch-slap you...



Skewed Sample by codemonkey uk (4.00 / 1) #26 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 05:42:04 AM EST
Tourists don't count. Your conclusions are based on a skewed sample set.

--- Thad ---
Growing a mustache for charity.
[ Parent ]

Touists. Right back at you, mate. by greyrat (3.00 / 0) #27 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 06:14:07 AM EST
And, just to be sure, you do know that the <SARCASM> <IRONY> and <HUMOR> tags are active in this chain?

[ Parent ]

Yeah, those Koren Monks really piss me of. by codemonkey uk (3.00 / 0) #29 Thu Apr 29, 2004 at 06:54:32 AM EST
Yeah, I know they are open, because I opened them up there in the body of the diary. Unless someone closed them in the meantime and I didn't notice...

--- Thad ---
Growing a mustache for charity.
[ Parent ]

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