I managed to follow along well enough, though that may be in part to having thoroughly read the ST:TNG Technical Manual and enjoyed its pseudoscience during my nerdier days [if I can claim to have "nerdier" days].

So yeah, keep writing!  At the very least it gives me something to do while at work.... err, on my lunch break, that is.  Of course!

I loved the atmosphere you created. The writing style was perfect for the sort of narrative that it was. Yes, it would've helped my understanding to have a character to identify with, but I think plot is a highly overrated literary device. ;-)
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I've got more than one membership to more than one club, and I owe my life to the people that I love. - Ani DiFranco

And I don't think it's as incoherent as you make it out to be. It made fine sense to me at the time, and I liked the narrator's voice. The fact that she (I got a female vibe that I can't entirely account for) isn't very specific, I thought, was part of the point -- the "everypersonness" of the little people ("our stories are all the same"). That doesn't work for every story, but it did for this one: both the rehabilitation of the planet and the story that describes it operate on a scale larger than the individual. So it fits. Though I kinda wanted Prochlorococcus to be the little "people" of the story.

Nicely done. I hope you write more for future WFCs.

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"later" meant either "when you walk around the corner" or "oatmeal."