Perhaps I thought people here had wizened up and learned from their past mistakes. Yet it doesn't seem to be the case.
What I have learned is to not put value on what negative people like yourself say about me. If I can do that, then it does not hurt as much.
Alas I cannot live and experience and learn and influence others due to the mental illnesses that I have. I am able to learn and experience, and I do want to influence others for the greater good. But I keep being discriminated against because of my mental illnesses, and it keeps me down.
When I did work, I helped others learn how to program, as many were hired with a Comp Sci degree but had problems learning how to program. I trained them and tutored them until they had a better understanding. When I was in college I tutored other students in programming and debugged their programs. Those were happier times for me, but those days are over.
It is hard for me to adjust to this world that discriminates against the mentally ill. Because I am mentally ill and it causes behavior in me, I often get the wrong ideas people make about me. There is a stigmata against the mentally ill in that we are the type to be assholes, or trolls, or bad people, because he have behavior that the mental illness creates that we have a hard time controlling. It is noticeable even on the Internet.
If I could be free of these mental illnesses I would be happier. But there is no cure. No hope. Just people who discriminate against me and confuse my mental illness for sanity. Yet I've been out of work since 2002 and my family have suffered for that too. Very few here have even bothered to try to see things from my point of view, and most don't and accuse me of being an asshole or troll without ever seeing things from my point of view or walking a mile in my shoes.
I don't even know why I considered giving Husi a second chance, or that I wouldn't be discriminated against again. I thought Husi had matured and grown up, guess I was wrong?
I had hoped to see Michael Crawford still posting on here, but like me he seems to have left due to discrimination against his mental illnesses. Which establishes a pattern with certain Husi members.
These few messages are the first time I remember ever responding to you, yet already you write me off as an enemy. So be it.-- This is not a psychotic episode. It is a cleansing moment of clarity.[ Parent ]
I am not writing you off as an enemy, just someone who doesn't understand me yet. Your few posts currently do have a negative effect on me, so that is why I thought you were a negative person. I guess with all the others attacking me in this thread I sort of get used to the idea of everyone here ganging up on me. Sorry about that, it is my paranoia talking.
We're not ganging up on you, we just have highly tuned bullshit detectors, and right now mine is off the scale; I've known genuinely ill people, and you just don't feel right.
Oh, and I most certainly am a negative person, but I haven't even begun to be negative towards you yet (ok, apart from maybe that last sentence). I simply don't believe you - schizo affective disorder I'll take on trust, but your employer poisoning you and you not suing? Bullshit. -- This is not a psychotic episode. It is a cleansing moment of clarity.[ Parent ]
